𝐶𝑌𝐵𝐸𝑅 / ...𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐨𝐬

the tokyo skyline gleamed through the mammoth windows that lined the sky lounge. titan panes of glass clear as spring water the laid the whole city into neat little segments. she could see her apartments, old and new dotted on opposite ends of the city. she used to live in marble hallways and shiny gold elevators. now music pounded through the thin walls of her one bedroom and her closet had exploded into wire racks that lined the walls of the apartment. she'd been selling her old designer pieces to get by, had nearly sobbed parting with her kelly bag. she'd be forced to get a real job soon enough unable to scrape by on what she made in the mata haris. a car model came to mind, or maybe one of those roadside scam psychics. she groaned into her martini defeated by the prospect of filing her own taxes and working a nine-to-five. it was easy then to sink her claws into eunchae when her dark silhouette appeared. "wow." she slurred face pink with the effort of straightening her back upright. "i'm surprised you're here. i thought for sure you'd be dancing with your siblings in hell like the rest of the demons."

as the taste of tequila burned the back of her throat heart hissed bracing her palm against the side of the bar. light pulsed around her, gradating in shades of green, blue, and pink. some techno-bass drivel thumped over the speakers rattling her down the tips of her stiletto heels. her thumb slipped over the crystal edge of the glass tracing lines along the sticky remnants of lime and salt. inferno had seen her too frequently ever since haneul's ownership had fallen into place. she could have done better by him but she had never been known for her gentle patronage. she wiped the sweat from the back of here neck finding a smear of glitter there and laughed. probably from the woman she'd been dancing with earlier who'd crackled and shined like a disco ball even when heart's vision had gone hazy. she leaned back against the bar dark hair catching in her arms and grinned wildly. "bash!" she yelled pushing off and shoving her way through the crowd gracelessly. "what the fuck are you doing here? i feel like i haven't seen you in forever. come dance with me!"

hand braced against the chipped marbled of her bathroom counter heart pulled her silk slip up to her ribs. soft blue fabric crumpled in the palm of her hand as she traced the raised pink scar just underneath her left breast. it had never healed properly, too much tissue damage they'd said. red nails circled in slow, assiduous movements over the raised patches of skin and she frowned. there was no pain or suffering but every time she saw it she could picture lux hernandez's face clear as crystal in her mind. she let her slip fall and sighed bitterly. she'd always been better at making enemies than friends. a trait of her acerbic wit and generally divisive personality. but the thought of their hands on her ribcage burned like phosphorous. her choices had been petty and selfish but she didn't know how they could inspire someone to hate her that much. she shivered. she didn't know what their secrets had cost them but she knew what it had almost cost her. it was why she'd joined the mata haris in the first place. nobody seemed inclined to forgive her that easily. she padded into the kitchen and pulled a bottle of whiskey from the top shelf. forgoing any glasses (it was just give her more to do later anyways) she took a long, flagellating swig and hissed. a knock pounded on her door her head whipped up. she looked at her phone uneasily, 12:37 am. she wasn't being that loud was she? when she opened her door lips curled into a dismissive frown she swore dark eyes going wide. "oh fuck." she slammed the door as hard as she could and scrambled for the kitchen grabbing the first knife she saw.

"ugh." heart's nose curled in disgust as bitter black coffee washed over the back of her tongue. her headache had only ceased to pound slightly when she curled up, feet tucked underneath her thighs on haneul's couch and gratefully accepted the mug. "that is actually fucking poison i have no idea how you drink that." on nights when loneliess crept up through her lungs and exhaled out in every stubbed chain-smoked cigarette she always found herself here in his familiar company. maybe her reliance wasn't fair to haneul, certainly he had other priorities regardless of whatever pity she had wallowed herself in that evening. but then again if she let go of haneul what else did she have to hold on to? she kicked up her feet on the coffee table knuckles drumming against the ridges of the mug. she looked younger, almost fresh faced were it not for the little lines of mascara that ringed her eyes. "hey" she said softly kicking his knee. "what's more important than me? c'mon, pay attention."

smoke curled in serpentine rings around her hand the faint glow of her cigarette illuminating the alley outside the back door of heaven's night. inside something bass-heavy and sensuous pounded against the brick reverberating out. her heels scratched against the concrete tapping in an anxious rhythm. her nights had morphed into this, melted down from ungodly highs and slithering through sewer drains to this end of town. she looked down at the scuff mark on the toe of her shoe and scoffed dragging her cigarette from her mouth red lipstick pressed in a perfect little ring around the butt. she was used to eyes following her but the hairs of the back of her neck stood on end and her spine straightened racketed with enough tension to snap her in half. she looked up and snorted wryly. "seriously you're alive?" julian's visage was half-shaded by the alley but she knew. "that's a shame. i had hoped you were dead. cigarette?" she shook the pack her face impassive and disinterested.

there are places where sound does not reach in this city. impenetrable by the light speed of vibrations and the symphony that rings in the ears of every poor son-of-a-bitch unlucky enough to still be living here. from this height where heart laid back spread out like a sacrifice she could almost reach the stars. she stretched her fingers upwards and the little gems on her nails glittered in the light pollution. there was no reason to be on the roof, there was no reason to be drinking either. it was simply that it was better to do these things than to not. if she had neatly tucked her heels into the doorway of her shitty apartment and sat in the darkness until her bones ached enough to go to sleep then that would have been her evening. all the nicer to be up here with jack listening to him drone. she sat sat up legs swinging over the side of the plastic chair yellowed with age underneath her. "has anyone ever told you-" she slurred, face flushed with inebriation. "you're like a little mosquito you buzz and buzz around someone's ear and then you bite down and drain all their blood. you're not even a sexy vampire like carmilla. you're nosferatu."