billy

sick + insomniac + can’t stop thinking about cooking bacon + absolutely obsessed with the feeling described during “awake for 81 hours” in dirty laundry = someone tell me to go to sleep and NOT stay up all night cooking and eating bacon just to see what happens

i wish i was fucking joking. i’m going to stay awake for fun. and i won’t have any reservations once i’m out of the air conditioned bedroom i’m just naked and cold right now so i have to take the first step

the polar plunge of cooking bacon at midnight

i ate a bagel and drank a bigass cup of lemonade but i’m still awake

im helping

a dude at the gym just reached in his bag, pulled out a bottle of Hershey’s chocolate syrup, smiled & shook his head like that’s just something that happens to people, put it back and then pulled out a bottle of water instead

dude have you watched arcade. it's based on a game called leading legends but it's actually good as fuck. even parents watch it.

no dude it's so cool how attached you are to that character who is singled out and ostracized due to the external monstrousness that clashes with their internal spark of humanity. and i love how drawn you are to themes of horror and love, nature versus nurture, otherness, isolation, and the abject. i bet you have normal feelings about your own personhood

i'm having a bad day. someone is going to die today (remembers suicide jokes are bad for my mental health) and it's not going to be me. (gets scared someone will report me to the police) people around the world die of natural causes every day. (remembers i want people to think i'm smart) and i know who it's going to be (remembers i want to retain an air of mystery) but i'm not telling.