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the reason ‘responsive parenting’ in regards to challenging gender norms doesn’t work is that you’d have to assume that the only means of socialising a child are their parents/caregivers, and that is obviously not true. most girls will still want to start wearing dresses and play with dolls when they see that is what other girls are doing and what is encouraged in them by other socialising forces. if you want to actually challenge gender norms as an individual you have to actively work against the society in which you live and, because the norms of the society are so extreme, move in a likewise extreme motion in the opposite direction. assuming that your starting point is neutral when it’s not won’t work, or else trying to hypothesise away the non-neutral starting point by dressing up all other forms of socialisation as “my child’s choice.”

a kind of bigotry that is still absolutely pervasive in feminist and marxist spaces is ableism tbh. the things I have seen. autistic still used as an insult, retard spewed everywhere. but tbh those aren’t the worst of it, the worst is when a ‘discussion point’ comes up about a symptom of disability and suddenly everyone’s real repressed views that disabled people are actually just attention-seeking burdens or liars rise to the surface. actually your ADHD friend is a bad friend when they turn up chronically late to everything, didn’t you realise they’re doing it because they can’t be bothered to give a fuck about you? and everyone will genuinely nod along. also don’t forget to use the ‘truly disabled’, like the blind, as figurative talking points to serve your argument, whilst implicitly arguing that if there weren’t such good accommodations for blindness, you’d leave them to rot too. how dare anyone’s disability ever affects me, I don’t owe anyone anything, this is a violation of my rights. don’t even get me started on the 24 hours everyone was seriously considering that maybe people with tourette’s maybe shouldn’t be allowed to go out in public. just because you’re politically engaged on women’s issues or class doesn’t suddenly mean you’re not still hyper online, use the same edgy 4chan internet speak everyone else online does, and doesn’t mean you know anything about any disability. like it’s ridiculous. so some 15 year olds online are making autism a bit too much of an aesthetic identity so now you think you can laugh at autism? be a fucking adult for two seconds. they’re 15. get a grip

decided I will finish the definitive lana del rey album + song ranking list that I started a few years ago. just rediscovered it and that was actually very fun!

my feminism has limits because unfortunately I do really like media that is an earnest portrayal of male friendship. it’s disgusting I know

it was obvious charli and lorde were going to make that thing cute like that they are both sweetpeas

does anyone have a book recommendation from a critical perspective about the concept of terrorism? by critical I mean someone aware of its political element and its definition being tied to excusing those with significant power (eg the state). I’d love to know about the usages of the word across time, the intricacies of the legal definition and its hypocrisies. potentially also the hypocrisy in distinguishing between political violence you like and political violence you don’t, eg mandela being a terrorist of his time but now he has been rehabilitated in the western imagination (whereas someone like castro has not been). or the suffragettes and how they were viewed at the time versus now where their violence has sort of been obscured. though I’m now talking about numerous books but I’m sure something like this must exist right

at this point it seems like everyone on ariana grande’s team must fucking hate her and also they must hate women so much