Yesterday I was hanging out with a couple of friends on discord - one of them from my city, one of them from a little village in the north of Ukraine. We're talking about dnd, because meeting for a game 3 times a week is not enough for us, apparently. At some point one of my friends interrupts the conversation with a little remark - "damn, the shooting is louder then usual today'. I suggest "cellar time" for his safety. We laugh. All 3 of us joke about how none of us have appropriate shelter nearby and how annoying it is when the sirens start blasting as you're walking your dog. Conversation moves on.
Some 10 minutes later the same friend interrupts the conversation again, audibly startled. "Fuck, guys, I gotta go" - and mutes himself.
That is harder to ignore. We stay silent for a minute.
Still, he is muted and not out - so his house probably isn't blown up. He took the time to warn us, so he personally is probably fine. And we know that discord does pick up the sound of explosion if it's happening close enough, and we haven't heard anything, so his immediate family is probably safe.
Further than that, there's no use to speculate. We won't know until - if - he comes back.
Slowly, we pick the conversation back up.
He comes back some 15 minutes later: "Guys, our hayloft is on fire". "How on fire?" - I ask. "Fully on fire". The cracking of the wood was loud enough to mistake it for the shooting, so it took awhile to notice anything out of the ordinary.
It's no big deal, apparently - no one was in the hayloft, not even the cat that likes to sleep there. The firefighters arrived 20 minutes later and even managed to save some of the hay. We chatted about dnd and the first season of arcane for 2 more hours.
It's a fun story, a cute one, even. But it takes it's place among others: the fact that every time I go to a bus stop I have to walk by my school currently constructing an underground facility so children don't have to stop classes with every air raid alarm that goes off. The fact that I celebrated my joint birthday with my uncle in candle light because of another attack on our power system. The fact that every explosion that i can faintly hear on discord as I talk to my friends, or that shakes the ground as I do groceries, or wakes me up at 2 am - carries real people with it being killed and injured. The fact that hearing the sound of shooting is enough for us to assume that "things are normal".
The normalcy of war is a terrifying and infectious thing - even for us, people living under under occupation and constant attacks. I can imagine it only gets worse as you get farther from the action. As we slowly approach the end of the 3rd year of this war going on, please, don't let yourself believe this is okay.
If you're able to, advocate with your officials for more help being sent to Ukraine. Donate to Come Back Alive, if you're able to. If you're able to, enjoy the peace.