This Is Normal Right ??

Summary: Robert Downey juniors teenage daughter lives with her mum, after her parents divorce. Robert doesn’t get any access to see her, and knows nothing about her life. After her abusive step dad goes to far and puts him in hospital, can Robert save her before

Basically I’m going to take on the evil step sister approach but make it male version. But whilst adding in physical abuse

Warnings: abuse, depression, hospitals.

“Y/N” your dad screamed from the kitchen. You couldn’t remember a time your dad hadn’t been screaming. Your house echoed so much you could have sworn that half of the bloody town could hear your mums shreak.

“I’m comming” you yell from your room. Big mistake. But it was to late now. You should have just kept your mouth shut, but then again, that outcome wouldn’t have been any better of an outcome.

You slowly make your way down the stairs into the kitchen where you see your two step brothers, and step father sitting around the kitchen table. You know sneaking in unnoticed isn’t an option so you except your defeat.

“What have I told you about yelling” says your stepfather in a sturn voice. You don’t reply, instead you keep your head down and look into your lap

“WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU” he screeches at you throwing his plate at your shoulder causing it to shatter and cut into your shoulder blade, making you wince

“Answer me you worthless piece of shit ” he screames at you and you can see your step brother preparing to throw their plates

“Not to do it” you mumble.

“ WHAT WAS THAT” he roared at you, slowly raising from the table, causing you to fall back off your stool and against a wall.

“Nothing sir, you told me not to do it” you say clearly with the small bit of confidence you have left. Suddenly a sharp object collides with your eye and you feel a stinging, painfully burning sensation. Your chew down in your lip to not make a scene.

“Was that talking back” you hear your oldest step brother say, whilst slowly decreasing to ground between you.

“ANSWER US” you hear your brother screech throughout the ringing in your ear.

“I’m sorry sirs, it won’t happen again” you say hiding your face in your hands.

Suddenly a foot collides with your tiny figure and you feel a snap, you know you’ve broken your second rib in a week, but there’s nothing you can do.

“I have heard that excuse far to much Y/N, I think you deserve a punishment” said your father breaking the ground between you and the group of towering men.

You wished that your mum was still alive. Maybe everything would be peaceful if your mum was still alive. If you hadn’t caused her death, as your father said.

“Please no” You beg, before you were sudenly shoved against a wall hearing even more bones crack.

“No more talking back” said your step dad dragging you by the hair up to stairs and into his bedroom door, locking it after being followed by your “brothers”. You closed your eyes as tight as you could, trying to ignore the horrendous pain that littered your body, and distract yourself from what you prayed would never come.

The screames of protest and pain that came next could have woken up the whole country if anyone listened hard enough, however living in a very remote part of the town meant no one could hear the cruel ness that your “family” was subjecting you to.

Xxxx

Robert was trying to sleep, he had to be up early for filming tomorrow, however there was something else on his mind. You. You were officially turning 16 tomorrow, and for a parent that is a very scary time, however this birthday was fillled with sadness and regret.

He had fought long and hard for custody over you for two years untill the court concluded that your mum could take better care of you. The last he ever saw of you was a seven year old little girl crying because she would never see her father again. Your mother would not let him ever speak to you, no matter how hard he tried, and he could not find you on any social media. He wished you were safe but something in his gut was telling him that something was wrong.

He couldn’t act on his feeling however as he was not granted any access to see you, therefor he would be breaking the law.

The last he remembered of you was your long ( hair colour) hair, and smiling face ripped away from him. He was sure you’d grown up by now and had changed physically greatly. However he wished you remembered him. He wished you and his current family could live together happily celebrating big milestones together.

“Can’t sleep” said a voice from behind him. Robert hadn’t noticed he’d moved from the inside of his trailer to the outside seating area.

“Umm, I’m just thinking” he said

“I’s this about Y/N ?” Said Chris Hemsworth taking a seat next to him.

“Yeah” said Robert sadly.

The entire avengers cast new about You. It had come out on a drunk night on the town, however no one had seen it effect him this much... ever.

“It’s her birthday tomorrow, her 16th” he said sadly.

“I’m sorry mate, I could never imagine not seeing one of my children, even living without them for that fact” said Chris trying to console your father to the best of his abilities.

“Something just isn’t sitting right with me, i know somethings wrong with her” said Robert.

“Have you tried getting custody again, even just visiting rights” asked Chris

“The case is to small, It’ll just be dismissed” said Robert sadly

“Keep your head up mate. Not long untill she leaves home , and then I’m sure she’ll want to meet her father” said Chris

“I guess your right” said your dad sighing in defeat”. However he still couldn’t shake the feeing something was wrong. He’d been feeling it a lot lately, and a fathers gut is never wrong

Xxxxx

“Y/N, pick up the pace” said your gym instructor. Of course today was the day you ran the mile. Every bone in your body was aching, and you were sure your body was running on adrenaline. You couldn’t get the disgusting feeling of betrail, and violation off you. You remembered every moment from the previous night, from the almost shattered shoulder bone, to the moment you were violated and entered. It made you want to cry however crying was a weakness. Crying was more reason for them to beat the emotion out of You.

You weren’t the slowest runner, actually you were quiet good, that’s why your gym teacher was so tough on you, she knew you had potential, if only she knew what was going on at home.

You finish the Lap slower than your usual time, however you could feel your body start to shut down.

“Everyone go get a drink.... Y/N not you, I wanna talk” said your coach watching everyone leave. You could see your vision start to loose focus, causing you to reach for your bottle, and chug half of it down.

“Honey, what’s going on. Your average is dropping, I’m getting worried”

You couldn’t reply, your ears started to ring, and your long sport top was causing you to sweat and fall of the seat, onto the floor, hitting your head. You could hear the distant ringing of your name however your to far gone. You feel your body start to go limp, and everything to go dark, you start to fade out of consciousness and the last thing you heard was screaming to call 911.

Xxxxxxxx

Robert had just finished filming and it was lunch time for the avengers crew. Almost all the crew members were there today, it was a big day for shooting and very busy, so getting to finally eat lunch was a blessing.

He took a seat around a table seating, Scarlett, Mark, Jeremy, Chris Evans, Chris Hemsworth, and Tom hidleston. They were all in the middle of a conversation when they saw Him sit down.

“Hey, you doing alright” said scarlet dropping the previous discussion.

“Peachy” he replied taking a bite of a sandwich. He suddenly saw one of the producers running up to the table with a frantic look on him face holding the main phone.

“You need to answer this. It’s important”the feeling of dread once again sat in the bottom of his stomach. he instantly answered the phone, his face Pailing almost imidiately, causing the other members of the cast to drop their food and commence worry.

“ I’ll be there as soon as I can” said your dad hanging up the phone.

He looked towards the manager receiving a nod.

“Take all the time you need, we’ll rearrange the schedule, let us know how it goes” said the director taking back the phone.

Robert quickly took of from the set, already on the phone to his wife.

“Honey I’ve got to go to Arizona, Y/N’s in the hospital

Xxxxxxx

You could feel your head pounding. The beeping around you didn’t stop. The fact that you couldn’t move your body didn’t help much either. The black vision slowly started to become brighter causing you to squint your eyes in pain. A forced wince came out of your mouth. Slowly you opened your eyes and started to see the white hospital room around you.

You could see the countless wires connected to you and the beeping of the heart monitor, was ringing in your ears. You tried to sit yourself up but you found that your body was restricted, and you were struggling to sit up.

“That’s not going to work honey, you’ve cracked your ribs, and we can’t risk them breaking again” said the nurse walking in.

“Oh” you say in a quiet voice resting your head back on the pillow.

“How are you feeling honey” said the nurse bustling around the room.

“I’m fine”

“Sweetheart, I’ve had my fair share patients. And the lies I’ve heard... I can’t help you unless you tell me the truth” she said

You sigh and look down to your lap.

“Everything hurts” you say in a quiet voice, trying not to gain any attention

“I suspected, your not afraid of needles are you” asked the nurse kindly.

“Not really no” you say.

“Y/N, You have to be honest with me. I’m only trying to help you” said the nurse politely.

“Umm.. I haven’t had a needle since I was 7. I’d have no way of knowing” you say as honest as you could.

“It’ll just be a pinch, you’ll be fine”. Said the nurse.

Suddenly you feel a pinch in your arm. You’d been through much worse, this felt like nothing.

“All done” said the nurse putting a plaster on your arm.

“Can I ask you a question”

“Go ahead”

“What’s going to happen the them” you ask.

A small sigh left her lips. not knowing if you were ready for the news she hesitated...

“All three of them are missing. Found out you were in the hospital and did a runner. The police have locked down the surrounding boarders to try and find them” said the nurse.

You sighed and nodded your head.

“Why are they taking such large measures” you said.

“Y/N there’s some things you haven’t been told... how much to do you know about your father. Asked the nurse with a smile on her face.

“Mum never talked about him. I haven’t even heard him mentioned since I was seven. I didn’t think he’d want anything to do with me” you say slowly lowering your head towards your lap.

“I can assure you hon he wanted so much to have you in his life. He’s right outside that door and he wants to see his little girl”

“What do you mean” you asked.

Suddenly there was a nock on the door, and In walked another woman, in a very fancy dress suit

“Hello Y/N” said the lady taking a seat beside the white framed bed.

“What’s going on” you asked sinking deeper into the sheets of the knitted white sheets.

“ I have your father outside this door as I’m sure you’ve been told... and he’s very keen to meet you... how would you feel about meeting him”

You didn’t get to sat another word before a medium sized man walked into the room. You couldn’t believe your eyes... the world had to be playing tricks on you... there was no way.. no way at all.

“You have to be kidding me”

Summary: the readers boyfriend is in the navy and had been deployed for the past year and a half. The boys surprise the reader at a con, and the whole audience knows. And at the end he proposes.

Warnings: crying, fluff, laughing, basic Jared and Jensen joking.

Please give me feedback I’ve wanted to write this for a while I’ve just struggled

You and they boys were currently at a con. You had been going to cons since you were eighteen; and you were now 21. Honestly you knew the boys had been doing it a lot longer, but for you cons freaked you out. You tended to be one of those people who didn’t care however when it came to cons you cared the most. Everything had been going pretty smothly so far. You always enjoyed cons with Jared and Jensen because they were the two funniest people you know.

Xxxxxxx

“My question is for Y/N” said the audience member which made Jared her fake angry and Jensen to just seriously judge Jared.

“Don’t worry about them sweetie, Jared’s just a two year old in disguise. What your question” you ask politely ignoring Jared hurt expression.

“Well, we know about everyone one else’s love life but we don’t know about yours. I understand if it’s to personal but I was curious if there was possibly a boyfriend in your life” asked the lady from the audience. Suddenly everything when’d quiet, which made you feel uncomfortable.

“Umm... I didn’t really think it was ever that much of a secret but yeah, I do have a boyfriend. I haven’t seen him for a year and a half since he’s been deployed in the army” you say in honestly. The audience just smile and Jared and Jensen look at you making you feel even more uncomfortable.

“Okay next question” says Jared noticing how uncomfortable you were getting. Jared picks another woman in the audience whom also has another question for you.

“So I also have a boyfriend in the military, however he’s only been deployed for about a month. I was wondering what it’s like having such a long distance relationship” said the lady. You sad smile understanding what she was going through.

“Honestly it get easier but harder at the same time. Because you become used to being by yourself without him next to you all the time. But it’s also hard because you can go weeks without a letter and be terrified because you have no if your boyfriend is still alive. And sometimes it gets really hard to think about all the things your missing. I think though, I can give you one word of advice. If you miss him just think about all the good he is doing for you and so many other people. Because without people in the military than the world would fall apart” you say smiling. The lady smiles and passes the mic back to the man.

Xxxxx

“Okay guys so we’re going to have a little competition. Y/N, and Jared are going to see how many darts they can get closest to the bullseye. But there’s a catch, if they win, then they get a suprise”. Said jensen causing the audince to cheer 

“When he says surprise, he means, there isn’t a surprise. he just wants to see weaher a girl can beet a guy at a simple task such as sharades” you say causing audiene to once again laugh and jared and jensen to glare at you. 

jensen brought out the targets and the games began. it wasn’t much of a competition seeing as jared could hardly get a shot in without it bouncing off the metal. you however managed to get almost every shot smack bang centre. honestly you were suspicious . jared was always pretty good witch accuracy and never had an off day, ever. and it wasn’t like jared to just loose and sit back and take it. he always threw a very fake overdramatic tantrum. 

“And Y/N finally won somethin against jared” mocked jensen making you put your hnds on your hips. 

“Seriously, am i the only one who thinks thats a bit fishy” you ask to the audience, all of which reply with a shake of there heads, indicating that they did not see anything wrong. What you didn’t know was that they were in on everything.

“Let me guess, I win a bag of snail shells, and an extra week of planking from the two of you” you say with sarcasm.

“We aren’t that mean Y/N” said Jared mock hurt.

“Sure you aren’t” you say rolling your eyes making the audience laugh.

“Here read this out loud” said Jensen passing you a letter.

“Hey baby, this note is currently being written a day before I leave you. If your reading this it means that times are getting tougher. Stay strong Y/N, I love you so much” you finish whispering and trying to stop the tears escaping your eyes.

“Why would you make me read that” you say trying to contain the emotions that you felt.

“ turn around” says Jared making you look at the screen behind you, suddenly is on the screen. The very last picture you had of you and your boyfriend.

“Why are you torturing me like this” you say, unable to contain the emotions. Not realisisng what had happened untill you heard a familiar voice behind you, one you never thought you would hear again.

“Because I asked them to” said the voice. You turned around so slowly you couldn’t believe your eyes. Suddenly nigers falls started falling from your eyes as you gripped onto your boyfriend for dear life, letting his uniform soak the tears you had in your eyes. The audience were flashing photos and gen and Daneel who were backstage with the kids couldn’t stop the tears from falling down there cheeks.

“I missed you baby” he said not removing you from his embrace. Unable to reply you removed your head from his shoulder and smashed your lips into his, causing the audience to erupt in cheers. The kids was very rough, but contained all the emotions that you had. Gen and daneel came out of the wings to go and be with there husbands. They were no where near taking your moment away, but they were not about to miss what was going to happen.

After the kiss ended you just stood there falling into his embrace.

“I love you” you say loud enough for the audience to hear but muffled by his shirt.

“I know you do” he says pulling you tighter to his chest. During that time many fans had not turned of there phones continuing to record everything that was happening. Daneel and Jensen were crying, and Jensen and Jared had smiles from ear to ear.

“You were all in on this, weren’t you” you say pulling away from your boyfriend and looking at them.

“Maybe said Jensen and Jared in unison making you smile. You ran into there arms, not sparing anytime in giving all four of them big hugs, thanking each and everyone one of them individually. What you didn’t notice was that a video started playing behind you. What alerted you however was the sound of the audience starting to sing falling in love by lily Reinhart.

You looked up frozen in your place as you watched the videos and photos from you and your boyfriends 4 years of dating, even the ones where you were so little. You couldn’t help the water works as they once again flowed freely out of your eyes. Once the video had stopped you looked over to Jared and Jensen who were gesturing to you to turn around, slowly you turned around and saw your boyfriend on one knee holding a box with a beautiful ring.

You instantly broke into one of the biggest rages of sobs you had ever experienced. Your boyfriend smiled and everyone elses “awwed”

“ Y/N Y/L/N, I have loved you for four years, and I can’t imagine my life without you, and I never want to go another day in fear that I’m going to loose the one woman who u would do anything for. You are so special to me and never want to loose you, not ever. You make me the happiest man alive , and bring a smile to my face every time I see you. So Y/N, Will you marry me” finished your boyfriend running a finger through is H/C hair.

You break down for what felt like the 100th time and run into his hands once again making his uniform soaked. You stood there for a few minutes sharing a deep kiss trying to tell him how much you love him.

“You never answered my question” he said once again going to one knee, the audience stopped and sat in anticipation while j2 held there wives closer.

“Of course you Idiot” you say looking into his eyes whilst the audience applaud, and Jared and Jensen cat whistle. He slide the ring onto your finger and you wipe your eyes. He embrace you in a hug not letting you go. The cheering of the audience started to blur out whilst you were in your lovers embrace, nothing else mattered at that time, just that you were with the person you love most, and would love most for the rest of you’re life.

“Let’s give it up for loving couple everyone” you hear Jared say into the mic, making you pull you chest away from your now fiancés. You smiled into the audience and help up both your hands, making them cheer even louder.

There were very few moments you had ever experienced emotions as strong as this. You once again hugged (boyfriend name) and weren’t letting go. He tightened his grip around you indicating that he was never letting you go.

You knew for the first time in a long time that you would fall into a easy sleep, with (boyfriend name) holding you, and the people you considered your family right beside you

Summary: Jareds teenage daughter is going through a tough time with depression and anxiety, but hasn’t told either of her parents. After a tough few week and a call with Jensen, they finally realise what’s going on. Unfortunately they aren’t early enough to stop anything bad happen. (I’m crap at summary’s)

warnings: Mentions of self harm, low self worth, anxiety attacks, father jared fluff, mother gen fluff. 

If you are struggling please reach out. my inbox is always welcome, and im usualy always active. 

You were lying on your bed. legit thats all that you were doing. you couldn’t bring yourself to do much more. You had lost all of your friends, and your anxiety continued to be a regular hinderence. You felt so overwhelmed however found comfort within the knitted sheets. You could hear your siblings running around the corridor, however you couldn’t bring yourself to join in.

Flashback: 

“Hey Y/N” Are you still able to come to allies 15th” Asked your best friend 

“umm, i can’t sorry” you mumbled, hating to let your friends down. 

“Come on Y/N you do this every time.” Said your friend clearly annoyed. 

“I’m sorry, i just can’t do it. My parents need to me to watch over my siblings. And my anxiety had been pretty bad lately so I’m not exactly in the mood to party” you say 

“Anxiety my arse. you just want attention. if you were a true friend then you would come” said your friend turing away. 

“I am your true friend” you snap. 

“Well we never were. we friended you because your dads pretty well known around like...everywhere. and we thought that you would be of some use to us, but we know your just like everyone else” screeched your friend through the halls. 

The students that were walking along the coridor paused to listen to the drama. 

You just sighed. you knew that no one would truley be your friend. You had been having the same problem for years, and you had become used to it.

“Don’t worry about the party, and don’t worry about ever talking to me, ally, or lucy ever again. we don’t need some filth like you following us around. 

“I’m sorry you think that way” you said walking of, into your chemistry class. you had gotten used to all the vile insults and the fact that you never had friends. You just learn’t to roll with it. But you were reaching your breaking point, and didn’t think you could do it for much longer

End flashback. 

You heard a nock on your door, snapping out of your thoughts and collecting yourself. You didn’t know how long they had been nocking. 

“Come in” you yelled, trying not to let the disspointment show in your voice. Your mother entered the room and smiled at you. you tried to smile back but you knew it was useless. 

“Everything okay sweetie” asked your mum from the door. 

“Everythings okay, Did you want something” You asked kindly. 

“Your father and i have to go to some meetings tomorow night. could you look after Your siblings for us” asked your mum polietly. you resisted the urge to sigh. you couldn’t say no to your parents, certainly not when they have four children. you put on your best fake smile. 

“Sure mum” You say trying not to sound distant. 

your mum smiled and took a seat at the end of your bed. 

“It’s okay if you want to do something else. we aren’t forcing you. You look after them alot you know” said your mother 

“No no, it’s not a problem”. you said trying not to let the tears fall. 

“Thank you honey” said you’re mum leaving your door. 

as soon as the door shut you burst into tears. Your dad was very busy so everything was up to your mum. you wanted to tell your father about your depression because he would know how to help you. but at the same time you didn’t want to be a burden, you didn’t want to add to his stress, even more then you were. 

You heard a small nock from your door. knowing that one of your brothers would be on the other side you opened your door, You dragged yourself of your bed and to the door handle. Standing there in their pajamas were your little brothers, Tom and Austin.

“Hey little tykes” you say knealing down to be at there level

“We heard you crying” Said tom from the door looking up at you with the cutest eyes. 

“We wanted to make sure you were okay” Said austin from behind. 

“I’m alright guys, nothing you two little muchkins need to worry about” you say ruffling there hair and making them giggle. 

“Have you eaten” you asked them. 

“Yes” they both say in unison. 

“Good boys” you say. 

“Oddets crying again” Said tom. 

“I remember when you two were her age you cried just as much. when she’s older she wont cry as much anymore” You said trying not to cry from the memories. 

“Okay Y/N”. said austin, hugging you followed closely by tom, you embraced them and then let them go. 

“How about you run back off to mum” You say. 

“Okay” they both reply running off. you smile, remembering when your life was as simple as there’s. You walk down the stairs to see oddette playing with the baby blocks. She smiles when she notices you, reaching her arms out for you to grab her. You pick her up with no hesitation and take a seat on the couch.

“She’s been asking for you all night you know” said your dad as he walked in with Austin and tom by his side.

“It must be a girl thing” you said lifting oddette above your head making her giggle.

“Maybe, but she didn’t want mum, isn’t that right munchkin ” said your dad grabbing oddette of you and letting Tom and Austin out of his embrace. You smiled.

“Guess I’m the favourite” you say putting on the best fake smile you could muster. Your dad looked at you. Sceptically.

“Is everything okay honey” asked your dad taking his focus of the children.

“Yeah, everything’s good” you said putting on yet another fake smile.

“You know you can talk to any of us right, even Jensen and Danielle” said your dad. For a moment you wanted to tell him how you felt. for a moment you wanted to fall into your fathers embrace and let everything out. but you couldn’t. you couldn’t put that kind of stress on your father. you just smiled. 

“I know” you say, holding back the tears. 

your dad smiled, but you could tell it was forced, and walked off to help feed oddette. you sighed and could feel your body shaking. you knew you were having an anxiety attack. you took a few deep breaths to calm you down, and 10 minuits later you were fine. you silently said goodnight your parents and your siblings, skipping dinner, and making your way to your room. you silently shut your door and slid down the back. you weren’t crying you were just sad. you picked yourself up and walked to your dresser pulling on a long hoodie, and some leggings. you set your alarm, and slid into bed ready for the day that was about the ensue. 

........................................................... 

jared didn’t worry. not about alot. but when it came to his family he worried the most. he had been noticing some differences lately. normally he would just push them aside and blame “Teenage years” however he was begining to become more worried. 

“Gen” Asked your dad as he saw his wife come into the room.

“Yeah” she said lying next to him in the bed. 

“I’m worried about Y/N” Said your dad. 

“I am two honey” Said gen. 

“I think we should talk to her” said your father thinking. 

"I think we should let her come to us, she’s a teenager now. I don’t think it’s right to invade her privacy” said gen.

“I’m not sure what to think” said Jared.

“ we’ll figure it out tomorrow. Let’s let her rest for the night” said gen. Flicking of the lamp. And pulling up the covers. Jared’s mind was still running. Very much worried about you. He knew something was wrong, but he couldn’t place his finger on it.

Xxxxxxxx

The following morning, your alarm went off at exactly 6 am. But of course you were already awake. You hit the button and swung your legs over the side of the bed.

As the oldest child you normally got Tom and shep ready in the morning. You’re parents needed to sleep, and oddette would wake them up not long after anyway.

What surprised you though was that your dad was awake and sitting on the kitchen counter. You were sure that he wouldn’t wake up untill at least 7. It was filming break between supernatural so he had a few months off.

“Morning dad” you say pulling down your jumper sleeves.

“Morning hon” said your dad putting down the paper he was looking at.

“Watcha doing” you ask making yourself a coffee on the opposite bench.

“ looking through your school report”. Said your dad. You instantly paled but kept making your coffee.

“Your grades haven’t changed much. However most of your comments say that you need to participate more in class” said your dad.

“I would participate if people didn’t constantly throw paper at the back of my head, telling me to stop being a smart ass” you mumbled.

“What was that” said your dad.

“Nothing. I’ll try harder, sorry”. You said .

“Honey, are you sure everything’s okay, you haven’t been yourself lately” said your dad eying you down.

“Nothing I cant handle” you say giving him a small smile. You quickly look down at your watch seeing that you should go and wake Tom and shep up.

“I should probably go wake the boys up” you say heading to there shared bedroom, and flicking on the light. 2 groans could be heard from the room, and a smile was planted on your face.

“Do you always wake them up in such a cruel way” laughed your dad.

“Those two slugs could sleep through bloody murder is you let them. They should be up and moving in about 5 minutes, If they don’t, spray them with the water bottle in the cupboard above the sink”. You say smirking and going into your bedroom.

5 minutes later you were dressed in some jeans and a yellow cropped jumper. You brushed your hair and braided both sides, letting them down the middle on your back. You packed up your books and laptop, switched off your light and made your way back to the kitchen.

“Morning Y/N” said shep from the table.

“Morning shep, morning Tom” you said, planting a kiss on there heads.

“You leaving already” asked your dad who was sitting next to your mum.

“Yeah, I have to finish an art project. I’ll walk shep and Tom home from school this afternoon, and pick oddette up from mels. Have fun at your meeting, have fun at school tykes” you say walking out the door.

“Hey Y/N” said your mum stopping you walking out the door.

“Yeah” you say stopping.

“Stay safe” she said, you smiled and nodded you’re head.

You shut the door and walked the 20 minute route to your school. Shep and Toms school was across the road. Mels house wasn’t far from the school, so oddette would be picked up after you collected the boys.

You made your way to school without a detour, and set your stuff up in the art room.

“Y/N. I didn’t think I would see you this morning” said the art teacher walking into the art room.

“Well I need to add some finishing touches to my painting. Wanted to finish it today” you say smiling.

“It looks great, I can’t wait to see what it looks like when it’s done” smiles your art teacher.

You smiled back and set to work on your painting. You were finished in less than 20 minuits and packed up your stuff.

“Thank you miss turner” you said about to leave.

“No problem Y/N... hey is everything okay” asked miss turner as you were leaving.

“Everything okay, nothing I can’t handle” you smile and leave the room. Your teacher wasn’t so convinced, but let it slide.

Xxxxxxx

“I’m not sure what’s wrong Jensen, she’s been pretty quiet” said your dad over the phone.

“I’m happy JJ isn’t even close to being a teenager yet. I’m sure it’s probably jut a phase” said Jensen through the phone.

“I know it’s not, something isn’t right, but I can’t place my finger on it” said your dad.

“Hey, I remember when something similar happened to you. You closed yourself off and it took us a while to get you to open up. Do you remember that ?” Said Jensen. Suddenly your dads face paled, how did he not notice.

“You don’t think...”

“I’m no doctor but it could definitely be. Depression is hereditary, and I know you don’t want your daughter to go through the same thing you went through, but... I think you should talk to her about it” said Jensen.

“Now I feel like a crap father, how did I not notice” said your dad putting his head in his hands.

“This isn’t your fault Jared. She’s hiding it, and that’s normally for teenagers. But now you think you know, it’s worth talking to her. Don’t blame yourself Jared” said Jensen.

“Thanks for your help mate” said your dad.

“No problem. Let me know how you get on” said Jensen.

“Will do” said your dad hanging up the phone.

“What was that about” said your mum taking a seat next to your dad.

“ I think I know what’s wrong with Y/N. But I know one thing. as soon as we get back from these meetings we need to talk to her” said your dad once again putting his head in his hands.

Xxxxxxx

“Shep come on, stop picking on your brother” you say putting shep on the opposite side of the footpath.

“But Y/N...”

“No buts, or I’ll make sure you don’t get any ice cream for desert; you’ll have an apple instead” you say making shep look down to the floor.

“Come on you two, I’m going to put oddette to sleep. You two go unpack your bags and grab your homework” you say unlocking the door and letting your brothers in.

“But Y/N-“

“No buts- no television untill you finish your homework, I’ll help you if your lucky” you say causing the brothers to smile and grab there homework.

You put oddette down to sleep in her crib, gave her a kiss on the head and, left the door open.

You sat down with Tom and shep and helped them with there homework. It was basic multiplication and addition so it was finished in no time.

“Y/N, what’s that on your arm” asked Tom. You froze. Your sleeve must have risen up. You quickly pulled it down.

“Don’t worry, it’s nothing. I just tripped and cut my arm on some glass” you say giving them a smile. True to their age, they both smiled and just ran over to the tv. You did a quick once over there work to make sure that it was all correct. You look over to see both of your brothers on the couch laughing at a cartoon that was playing. You feel a pang in your heart. You miss the days where go could curl up on a couch and laugh your heart out to some pointless cartoon.

Xxxxxxxxx

“Boys come on time for bed” you called switching of the tv. They both new very well that bed time was bedtime. After a two sets of bedtime routines both Tom and shep had fallen asleep. You kiss them both and closed there door. You sighed and walked to the lounge room. Flicking off the tv, and packing up the dinner dishes, you walk back to your bedroom and closed the door. Then you heard a nock. You just wanted to be alone.

Xxxxxxxxx

Your dad and mum got home not long after you put your siblings to bed.

“Daddy” said Tom as he kissed his head.

“Hey squirt go back to sleep, we’re home” said your dad trying to send him into sleep mode.

“Daddy, we saw something on Y/Ns arm. Like a mark, and she said she tripped”. Your dads face paled. He knew you didn’t trip. He just didn’t think he caught you so late. Late enough that you had already hurt yourself.

“Don’t worry Tom, it’s nothing that you should be worried about. She’ll be right as rain soon” said your dad ruffling his hair.

Xxxxxxxxx

“Sweetie” asked your dad from the other side of the door.

“Come in” you say. Your dad walks into your room to see you sitting on your desk, doing an assignment.

“Hey dad, is everything okay” you ask seing your dad just looking at you.

“Honey, I think we need to talk” said your dad, sitting at the end of the bed. You look at him questioningly, as he pats the middle of the bed.

“Where’s mum” you ask, taking a spot on the bed.

“I’m here honey, just tucking oddette into bed” said your mum closing the door from where she walked in.

“Honey. Is there something your not telling us” said your mum, taking a seat on the other side of you.

“U-um - what- do-y-you m-mea-“

“Y/N, show us your arms” asked your dad a look of concern on his face. You sighed, and lifted up your sleeves revealing the light cuts that littered your arm.

“Oh Y/N” said your mother pulling you into a hug. You just hugged back, letting a tear fall down your cheek.

“I just feel so... empty” you chocked out between sobs.

Your dad instantly took over, and started hugging you.

“Why wouldn’t you tell us” said your dad clearly hurt.

“I didn’t want to burden you. You have the others to worry about. I’m a teenager, I should be able to handle my own problems”. You say leaning your head on his shoulder.

“Not for something like this. You shouldn’t be keeping this to yourself” said your mum. Pulling your hair out of your face.

“ I felt the same way at your age. And it took so long for me to realise what was happening. I remember when things got tough your mum and Jensen were there to help through it. You are in no way a burden for feeling this way. You are our daughter and we love you so much” said your dad making you cry even more.

It felt like a weight had been lifted off your shoulder. And the tears were flowing freely.

“I’m sick of feeling this way, I need help” You hiccuped, making your parents hearts shatter even more.

“We know honey, and we’ll get you some help” said your mum once again brushing the hair away from your face.

“How did you know about the cuts” you asked.

“Tom was worried. I knew for a fact you didn’t trip”. Said your dad as you pulled away.

“Yeah, that kids to smart for his own good” you say slightly smiling.

“We love you, you know that right” said your mum, grabbing your hand.

“Yeah, I do” you say giving her a smile.

Xxxxxxxxx

You got the help you needed, and soon you were feeling better. You started participating in group events again and no longer kept your feelings a secret. Your parents were the best comfort you had, and you were forever that you had such amazing people in your life. after your parents found out what was going on at your school they pulled you out and transfered you to a school closer to your home. Yes things were hard, and sometimes you fell back into a pit of darkness, but there was always someone to help you out of it. No you were not okay, but you were working your way there. And with time and support, you knew youwould be back to your old self in no time. 

Summary: after a rough few weeks the readers depression becomes to much and decides to stop fighting. however the attempt is unsuccesful, and jensen, jared, gen, and daneel are left to pick up the pieces, but is that such a bad thing. 

Warnings: suicide, self harm, over dosing, anxiety, fluff from j2 daneel and gen, slight anorexia, insomnia. 

Side note: please reach out for help if you need it, and review. i appreciate all feedback. enjoy the story 

you are the 15 year old cast member of supernatural that played the whinchesters younger sister. You had been introduced in season 4 at just 6 years old. The fandom loved you, especially your character. You were essentially a little sister to every cast member. Jared and Jensen had become very close with you, especially as you spent the most time with them. 

over the years your character had matured into a beautiful, strong, and powerful young woman. Everyone had seen you grow up, and never once did anyone see you unhappy, or not smiling. At least they thought you were happy.

You had been hiding the anxiety, and depression you had been feeling for a year from everyone you knew. It would come in waves, and you had becoming accustomed to hiding your pain. But lately it had been adding up. You were managing well with school and filming, following a schedule that would keep you busy. However very important finals had been added onto your plate and you were feeling the stress.

Because of filming you had become distant from most of your friends. Without physical contact and interaction, you had drifted. You were doing most of your schooling online, and your friends were all learning in a classroom. You were a pretty smart kid, maintaining good grades, however even this was becoming a stretch. You were in your last few years of school, and struggling in silence, not wanting to alert anyone that you were In pain, and particularly not wanting to be a burden to anyone else.

Xxxxxxxxxxx

You sighed, dropping your pen on your paper. You had been filming for most of the day and you had to complete your 4 hours of school work. You had been completing most of it during breaks however, the lack of sleep you had been getting was catching up to you. You decided to pack up your stuff. You had already submitted the work that was due for the day and decided that you would finish the rest another times. Just as you were about to pack up your laptop you got a call from your friend.

You slid across the answer button, to see them at some sort of sleepover.

“Where are you” you asked with a smile on your face.

“At (friends) birthday sleepover” said your friend laughing. Suddenly your face dropped. You completely forgot about it was (friends) birthday. You felt a strong guilt in your chest.

“Earth to Y/N” asked your friend through the screen snapping you out of your daze.

“I completely forgot. She hates me doesn’t she” you said a tear streaming down your face.

“She’s a little upset, but she doesn’t seem to phased” said your friend shaking of your concern.

“I’m such a crap friend” you mumbled into your hands trying to wipe the tears.

“ it’s nothing to bad, she knows your busy” said your best friend stuffing her face with candy.

“I sent a present last week, let me know when she gets It will ya” you said.

“Sure will. I have to go, but chat later” she says, hanging up the call. You didn’t even get to say goodbye.

You sigh once again and pile your school stuff back into your bag. You switch of the lights to your trailer and locked the door. Making your way to the filming set. Jensen and Jared were filming a final scene so you decided to go and check it out. You see Misha sitting on one of the benches behind the cameras you take a quick seat next to him.

“Hey Y/N, how are you doing” he asks lifting his head to look at you.

“I’m okay. Just thought I would come and see what you guys were up to before I headed home” you say tying up the lace of your shoe.

You were one of the lucky ones. The filming set of supernatural was a 20 minute walk from your house. The other actors had been staying in there trailers however you were allowed to go home.

“Well, stay safe” said Misha smiling. You returned it picking up your bag. As soon as the director yelled cut, the boys broke out laughing. You waved to them signaling that you were leaving. They waved back, only Jared looked at you for a little longer. Concern evident on his features. You sighed and walked away, along the pavement that led to your house. It took about 30 minutes for you to get home, as you had to walk slower to ensure that you would not collapse from lack of sleep or food.

You usually kept your body healthy, but due to everything going on, you had been living off coffee, to maximise your Time. You didn’t know how you were doing it but you were still very much walking. You slowly unlocked to the door making sure to not make anything loud enough to wake up your aunt and uncle. You slid of your shoes and coat and hang them up nex to the door.

You slowly make your way up to the stairs and into your bedroom. You flick on the light and take a seat at the end of your bed. Suddenly your phone vibrates and you see a message from one of your friends.

“A video” you say to yourself. You flick it on and are shocked by what you see you. YOUR BOYFRIEND kissing your friend. On her birthday.

“So much for not angry” you whisper to yourself letting the tears fall from your eyes. You didn’t need another thing adding onto your life workload, but now there was. Your aunt was sure to be in bed. And your uncle was probably doing the same.

Your boyfriend was one of the only people keeping you sane, and now he went and broke your heart. You wanted th throw something god you wanted to scream, but your body could not handle that and you did not want to wake up your aunt and uncle.

You sat on the floor of your bed, you had no more tears left to cry. The cheating you could deal with, but the betrayal of your friend pushed you over the edge. Leaving you to your thoughts during the night, especially in the emotional space you are in, was not a good idea.

You didn’t want to live in pain anymore. You weren’t as strong as Jared, you didn’t open up about your feelings, and you were sick of putting on a mask. You were sick of all this stress, and pain of loosing the people that you love. You didn’t want to put other people through the pain that you felt but you didn’t want to live like this. If you made it quick then, no one would be left to pick up the pieces that would be left of you. You’d be dead.

You mustered all the energy you could and got up from your bedroom floor. Pulling off your winter clothes you changed into some long pajama pants and a singlet top. You walk into your bathroom. You open the bathroom cabinet and grab your depression medication out from the top shelf. You grab one of the pairs of scissors lying around your room and locked your bathroom door. You didn’t want anyone to find you untill you were dead. You couldn’t bare to see the looks on anyone’s face once they realised how broken you were.

You shoved the medication down your throat and took a seat against the bath tub. You cried out in pain, the feeling of the medication entering your system made you collapse onto the floor.

“ Y/N, honey are you okay” asked your aunt from the other side of the door. You didn’t want to put her through the pain of seeing you dying on the floor. You put the scissors to your wrist making 2 cuts on each arm, making your cry out again.

“Y/N honey, I’m coming in” said your aunt. She opened the door and saw your dying form lying there.

“Oh my Y/N- (uncle name) call an ambulance, oh honey hold on” said your aunt holding your form in her hands, you thought you locked the door. Guilt settled in your stomach, making you want to die more.

No longer than 10 minutes later an ambulance arrived and family’s from around the street were coming out to see what the commotion was about. You remember loosing consciousness in your uncles arms after he carried you out to the ambulance. The rest of it was fuzzy. But you knew one thing you had fucked up your life in one single night.

Xxxxxxx

The next day the cast walked onto to set. Jared was the first one to pick up on your absense. There was no laughing coming from the makeup trailer, and no lights on in your trailer. For filming today gen and Daneel were also tagging along. After asking around Jared is told by the producers that you are sick. That struck everyone as weird. They even called Misha, as he wasn’t on for filming today, however he said he hadn’t heard from you. You had never once missed a day of filming unless it was for school purposes. And when you were sick you would tough it out anyway.

Not long after jared receive a call from your cell however it wasn’t you. Of course... they didn’t know that. It was your Aunty.

“Hey Y/N, heard you were sick, how ya feeling” asked Jared into the phone, grabbing everyone’s attention. However the voice that responded was not you, it was your Aunty. As soon as Jared had heard what had happened his face paled. Shock evident on his features alerting everyone that something was wrong.

“Jared, what’s wrong” asked Jensen knowing it involved you.

“ Y/N... she uh-she u-uh” said Jared trying to get the words out of him mouth.

“Hey j calm down, just tell us what happened” said gen, trying to calm her boyfriend down.

“Umm... Y/N attempted suicide last night” Jared said between cries.

Everyone instantly stopped, all clearly shocked at the news. they didn’t realise that you was struggling so much.

“Is- is she okay” asked Jensen comforting his wife.

“Umm... she’s alive, definitely not alright though” said Jared hugging gen to keep themselves together. The entire set suddenly turned somber. The mood instantly dropping

“Something must have happened last night to... make her feel... to lead to this” said Jensen. Trying not to cry.

“Her aunt said she found her on the bathroom floor, Over dosed on pills and wrists slit. God how did I not notice the signs, I should have been there for her” Jared sobbed into gens shirt.

“It’s not your fault Jared, none of us knew she felt this way. Don’t you dare blame yourself” said Daneel, still consoling her husband.

“I say we pay her a visit. Now that we know she isn’t going through this alone” said gen. They knew you were going to be broken but they were going to be there for you every step of the way.

Xxxxxxx

“Oh it’s lovely to see you” said your aunt ushering them all inside.

“How’s she doing” asked Jared once again concerned.

“Honestly I don’t know. She won’t talk to me we only got home from the hospital an hour ago. She hasn’t said a word since we got back. (Uncle) can’t even get through to her” said your aunt.

“Where is she at the moment” asking Jensen.

“ Y/Ns in her room. I sent her to get some shut eye but I don’t think she’s sleeping” said your aunt.

Everyone just gave each other looks. They knew Y/N hadn’t been sleeping, but they also thought she was keeping on top of things.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about this earlier. She didn’t want me to tell you, but I couldn’t let you find out some other way. She said she didn’t want to be seen as less of a human, especially not to you guys” said your aunt handing out cups of hot tea. Many thankyous were spared and an uncomfortable silence filled the air.

“Did you notice anything about Y/N, like something that would give a hint that she would do this” asked your aunt taking a sip from the cup.

“we all just though it was exam stress. The skipping meals, spending most of her time doing school work, or sitting in her trailer. We thought it would pass. She never once mentioned that she was... suicidal” said gen. Fiddling with the sleeves of her jumper.

“ as a child, Y/Ns parents used to put a lot of pressure on her to be a good kid. She also learnt to hide her pain. Me and (uncle) have been trying to tell her for years that it’s normall to feel pain, but I guess it’s hard to comprehend that when most out your life your told different” said your aunt.

“She never really ever mentioned her parents, to any of us” said Daneel, sympathy in her eyes.

“I can’t blame the poor kid. She was abused for years before I even realised that my sister had a child. Ever since she was little she’s always been quiet and co-operative. She’s still pretty scarred, and doesn’t talk about it”. Said your uncle walking in.

“How is she” asked your aunt.

“Not doing to good. She won’t tell me anything. I’m getting worried” said your uncle

“ I know this is a big ask but could we possibly see her” asked Jensen.

“Of course, I’m not sure what state she’s in” said your aunt allowing them to follow up the stairs and into your room. Nothing in the room would have ever suggested that you felt this way.

Suddenly there attention was drawn to the water running in the bathroom.

“ Y/N. Honey, let me know your okay please” asked your aunt panic filling your voice.

“I’ll be out in a minute” replied your quiet voice through the door. Her panic subsided when she hears your voice. They 4 adults walk back to the kitchen following your aunt. None of them could believe how quiet you were.The once outgoing and bubbly girl that you used to be, was now reduced to silence.

“You know, she was adamant about coming to set today. As soon as we got home from the hospital she started getting ready. Me and (aunt name) had to give her medication to make her sleep. She didn’t want this attempt to make anyone see her different” said your uncle as they returned from your bedroom. A few minutes passed.

After a little bit of time of awkward conversation , you came down with your head hung low and grabbed a mug of coffee. During that time no one dares to talk to you. They didn’t want to put you under stress. They didn’t want to put you in a situation you felt you couldn’t escape from. However there shock returned once they saw how frail you were.how your eyes had sunken into your head and your clothes remained baggy on your frame. You walked back in the direction of your room not bothering to grab any food.

“Honey, do us a favour and keep your door open” said your aunt as you were leaving the room. You just stopped in your tracks, nodded, and walked away.

“I think I’m going to talk to her. She needs someone who has gone through what she’s gone through. I’m the only one diagnosed with depression. I’m going to try and get her to open up, break out of her. We’re getting the old Y/N back”. Said Jared standing up and making his way to your bedroom.

He nocks a few times on your open door, only so see you sitting on the end of the bed, holding a picture frame of you and a guy.

“Who’s that” asked Jared taking a seat next to you.

“My boyfriend... well my ex boyfriend now I guess”

“What happened” asked Jared genuinely concerned.

“My “best friend” sent me a video, of him and another friend hooking up last night. Found out when I got back from the hospital that they slept together as well” You said with no emotion on your face He didn’t hesitate to pull you into a hug and suddenly you broke, and started crying.

You told him how your boyfriend cheating was the last straw. That you didn’t know what you were doing when you enetered the bathroom, you crumbled, and didn’t want to constantly feel this pain inside your chest, that kept dragging you down and making you feel worthless.

He pulls you closer and gently lifts up your sleeves to reveal the bandages that were covering up stitches on your arm.

“Your like a daughter to me, and I can’t imagine my life without you. You shouldn’t feel an obligation cover this up. Your experiences make you into the person today and you shouldn’t be afraid to show the war you lossed. He told you that it is nothing you should cover up. Your scars make you stronger, and change you into the person you are today” he told you, not loosening his grip once.

Hearing those words make you break down even more. he tells you that Your aunt told them why you lived with her. You opened up and told. him that the memories that come back surrounding that topic also tipped you over the edge. And that in your delusional state you believed the words your dad said to you. You believed that you would be better dead, that you were a burden, and a mistake.

Jared decided to shoot Jen a text in this time, in the time that you are him we’re hugging. Not even a minute later gen is In the room, and her heart breaks to see you like this. You look up and try and calm your tears in fear of embarrassment. She had never once recalled a time where you had even cried let alone be this emotional. She gave Jared a kind smile and instantly sat next to Jared. When you tears subsided a little bit she gave you a warm embrace, to which you leaned into. She mumbled small word of encouragement, and calming.

“I’m not sorry for doing it, I’m sorry that It didn’t work, I still wanna die. I feel like I’m such a burden to everyone”. You said into her chest. Her and Jared shared a look, both deciding to keep this talk till after you had settled down.

“Honey when was the last time you ate” asked gen.

“Umm. Not properly for a while. Things just got carried away, so it didn’t cross my mind” you said, your tears comming to a Hault.

“You need to eat something” said Jared, noticing the rest of the group standing at the door, with some toast in there hand.

“I’m not hungry” you mumble, being stubborn, hanging your head.

“Sweetie, we aren’t leaving untill you eat what’s on this plate” said Jensen, grabbing the plate from de’s hand. You looked up only just noticing the two extra bodies in your room. You sighed seeing that they only put a few pieces of toast on the plate.

“Come on, do it for us, for your Family” said Daneel handing over he plate to, which you carefully took.

You stood up and slid down the end of your bed, onto the floor, Jensen and Daneel sitting next to you, deciding it was there turn to be the parent figures they should be, and Jared and Gen sitting on the floor across from you against the wall opposite the bed.

You grabbed the toast and took small bites, desperately trying to keep the food down. After you had finished you wanted to go to the bathroom however no one would let you because they knew that you were likely to purge.

“Y/N, sweetie, I know we’re asking a lot of questions but have you slept a lot recently” asked gen, looking directly at You. You looked up and sighed.

“Like I said, I’ve been busy. Everything’s been so Jammed pack, especially managing school, and filming. I haven’t really had the time ”. You admit pulling your knees to your chest. D and Jensen both put there arms around your shoulder.

“Did you get any sleep last night” asked Jensen and Jared at the same time.

“Not really. I lost consciousness for about an hour, but I haven’t really slept” you say, rubbing your face with your hand.

“ Y/N, you need to sleep”. Said Jared about to stand up and throw you on the bed.

“No point, insomnia is a bitch. Especially now. I’m not allowed any medications now so I’m getting less sleep now than ever” you say sighing.

Once again a shared look went around the circle. The anxiety you felt caused you to start picked at the skin on your arm.

“No Y/N, don’t” said gen pulling your hand away from for arm. You sighed and bent your head back.

“ Y/N why didn’t you come to us. We could have helped you. Been there for you” said Jared, a tear sliding down his cheek.

“ I didn’t want to add onto the stress you had. I’m only a teenager besides for most of my life I was a told to not voice my opninion. So it’s kinda stuck” you say.

“Oh sweetie” said Daneel wrapping you in an embrace. You didn’t cry just rested your head on shoulder warming into her embrace.

“I don’t want to die, I just... I’m sick of this pain. The overwhelming crushing feeling. It just became to much” you say into daneels shoulder, she hugged you even tighter.

“Where here now. And you need to talk to us when to feel like this. No keeping it to yourself” said Jensen.

“ your like a daughter to all of us Y/N. Don’t forget that” said Daneel.

“ and no letting everything pile up until you hit breaking point” said gen.

“ and definitely no your an adult don’t worry about my problems talk” said Jared.

“Yeah yeah. I know I promise I won’t keep things to myself” you say lifting your head and showing a genuine smile.

“There’s the smile we know and love” said Jared ruffling your head.

Xxxxxx

“ I wonder what they’re up to” said your aunt to  your uncle.

“They’ve been up there for a while” said your uncle agreeing.

“Come on” said your uncle making his way up the stairs. what he saw surprised him , but made him smile none the less.

“ honey have a look at this”. Said your uncle from the door way, gesturing for your aunt.

There you were lying the middle of the bed tv playing surrounded by Jared, Jensen, gen, and Daneel, all fast asleep head on each other shoulder.

“I don’t think I’ve seen her sleep for a while” said your aunt putting her arm around your uncles neck.

“I think things are going to be okay” said your uncle planting a kiss on your aunts head.

“I think as long as she has these four, she’ll be fine in no time” said your aunt.

summary: You are jensens 15 year old daughter and your parents have been spending there time with your younger siblings. you start to become lonely and start thinking how everyone would be better off without you. Jensen and daniel get a call from your friend, raising her concern for you ,and they learn how bad your mentall health actually is.

Warnings: Possible self harm, suicidal thoughts, self hating language, attempted suicide, bullying, father jensen and mother daniel fluff. 

Please if this is happening to you, or you feel like this tell someone. i know what it’s like to keep your feeling bottled up. please don’t do it. my messages are always open

xxxxxx

you were sitting on your bed staring at the phone screen. it didn’t matter how hard you tried you couldn’t tear your eyes away from it. the hurtful words made you feel something. Everyone assumed That being Y/N Ackles made your life great. and of course your dad and Daniel loved you, but they were far to busy these days for you to bother them with your problems.

Ever since you were a child it had always been you and your dad. your mum didn’t want you so when she gave birth to you, she gave you straight to your father and ran. you were always a quiet kid, never causing any problems. but that meant you learned to  keep your problems to yourself. your father was far to busy with his acting to deal with your miner todler problems.

when daniel came along your father had finally found love again. being 12 years old at the time you understood that they both loved eachother. She treated you like her child, and loved you as much as a mother should. you loved daniel with all of your heart, and so did your father. 

When j, Zeplin, and arrow came along you felt complete. you had always wanted younger siblings, and you finally had them. you loved them, you really did, but sometimes you wished your parents would have more time for you. 

2 months ago your family moved houses and you had to start at a new school. your siblings were all to young to start school, whilst you were starting your 10th grade. being 15 was hard enough, but having to start at a whole knew school was nothing good. normally you would have no problem making friends. everyone knew the name Ackles. sometimes you wished you had actuall friends who didn’t just hang around with you for the exposure. sometimes you wished you were lucky enough to score real friends.

but this time you knew it wouldn’t be the same. you knew from day one that you were not welcome at that school. from the very start you were called horrible names, and contantly hurt, shoved, pushed, tripped, and more when you were just collecting your books. you couldn’t add on to your parents stress and you knew that your siblings were to young to understand, so you kept quiet. 

sometimes you would video chat (Insert best friend name here). your best friend from your old school. she was your friend because she loved you as a person, not because of your name. but you knew better than anyone that she didn’t need your problems adding onto her stress. 

xxxxxxx

“Y/N dinner” called daniel from the kitchen. you wiped you eyes and switched your phone screen off. you pulled on you’re jumper and pajama pants and went down stairs. when you arrived you saw your mother feeding arrow and your father feeding zep. Jay was sitting at the table eating her pasta and watching a barbie movie on her Ipad. 

“Your dinners on the bench Y/N, help yourself” Siad your dad gesturing to the bowel of pasta left for you. 

“Thanks” You said taking a small portion of pasta and sitting next to jay. once Daniel noticed the little amount of pasta on your plate she nudged your dad on the shoulder, causing him to look at your plate. 

“Are you not going to eat anymore” Asked Daniel worry evident in her voice. 

“Sorry mum, i’m not that hungry” you mumbled playing with your food. 

“Are you not feeling well honey” asked you dad, taking his eyes of zep. 

“I’m alright, just don’t have much of an appitite” you said shrugging off the  matter. 

Your parents looked at eachother, more worry evident on there features. truth be toold they had a reason to worry. since you moved you hadn’t been eating as much as you should be. you play basketball so you needed to maintain your body. however since moving you had dropped basketball completely. you spen’t most of your lunchbreaks in the library, where food isn’t allowed. you had lost 20 kilograms in the past 2 months, which wasn’t healthy considering you were already small for your age. Your parent’s had been noticing the weight loss, but didn’t really question it considering that they thought you were just stressed. however 2 months in and you were still showing signs. 

“Y/N, can you braid my hair please” asked jay giving you puppy dog eyes. you sighed. 

“Course jay” you said letting jay lead you up to her shared bedroom, leaving your bowl of food untouched. 

xxxxxxxxx

“I’m worried about her” said your mum once you had left the room. 

“Me two” said your dad, concern clearly evident in his voice

“You don’t think she’s anorexic do you” Asked your mum placing arrow down in the high chair. 

“I don’t hink so, she would have lost more weight by now. besides she would be excercising like crazy, she doesn’t seem to leave her bed much now days” said your father placing zepline in the chair opposite arrow. 

“Maybe she’s going through exams, that could be why she’s loosing all the weight” said your mum, trying to find a reason for your weight loss. 

“The school wrang me yesterday”. said your dad just as he remembered. 

“You’re only telling me this now, what did they say” asked your mother. 

“Her lunch pass hasn’t been used in over a month. they also said that she dropped out of basketball and drama, they were worried about her” said your dad. 

“Maybe we should give her some space untill she opens up” said your mum cleaning up the dishes. 

“Yeah maybe”. said your dad. he knew something was wrong, but he didn’t know what. 

xxxxxxxxxxxx

The following day at school you kept your head down and avioded the crowds of poeple walking the halls you quickly grabbed you’re books and headed to the bathroom. shutting the stool door you pulled up your jumper revealing the many cuts and burns running up your hip, you silently let a tear fall down you’re face knowing that you were so lost. you pulled back down you’re jumper and walked over to the mirror, your appearence looked tired. your hair looked dead and your eyes had purple bags under them, your face looked deathly pale and slim, far different from the girl you used to be. you washed your face picked up your bags and hastily exsited the bathroom. 

after ariving to you’re first class you found your seat in the midle of the classroom and pulled out your laptop, you stopped when you saww it. the top of it was covered in notes full of hatefull words, drawn on in permanent marker, you opemed it to see more written on you’re screen. 

you let the tears full freely down your face, you didn’t know why but you started reading them. 

“GO DIE, YOUR PARENT’S WOULD BE BETTER OFF WITHOUT YOU’ 

“I’M SURE YOURE SIBLINGS WOULD PREFER IT IF YOU JUST LEFT” 

“ YOU DIRTY PIECE OF FILTH, NO ONE LIKES YOU, JUST GO BACK TO THE HELL HOLE YOU CAME FROM’ 

‘ YOU FILTHY SLUT, GO SPREAD YOUR GERMS SOMEWHERE ELSE, YOUR NOT WANTED HER SO DO US ALL A FAVOUR AND DIE” 

You didn’t realise untill you finsihed that the whole class was laughing at you. because it was a study period you didn’t have an assigned teacher so there was no one to tell them to stop. you packed up your stuff and headed to the library where you would signed in and set in the corner. sitting down on a bean bag you curled up and started sobbing. pulling out your phone you looked through the photos. the one of zeplin, jay, and arrow, sitting curled into you while you read to them. the one of you your dad and daniel when you won your first basketball game. the one of you and (Best friend) when you both won the science fair. the one of you and your primary school teacher when you recieved your graduation certificate. you started crying even more, knowing that things would never be the same again. 

You were about to turn off your phone when you saw a call from your dad you wiped the tears from your eyes and answered it. 

“Hey dad” You said as cheery as you could

“Hey bug, how are you” he said 

“Fine, is everything okay” you said knowing that your dad normally didn’t call you during school hours. 

“Everythings fine. me and mum are going to have to stay on set late tonight. the kids are with uncle jared. is it okay if you catch the bus home today. theres dinner in the fridge and the remote on the counter” asked your dad 

“Of course” you said trying not to cry. 

“okay sweetie, we’ll be home as soon as we can. i love you” said your dad hanging up the phone 

“I love you to” you wispered to no one in particular. 

xxxxxxxx

The bus ride home was horrible. you constantly had paper and balls thrown at you, and insults left right and centre. you packed up your stuff and headed off the bus afew stoped before your house, so you could clear your head. on the way out your bus driver grabbed your arm. 

“You okay kid” he asked kindly a sad smile on his lips. you put on your fake smile a replied an “i’m fine” before exsiting the bus. you took your time getting home as you knew it would be hours before anyone else arrived. you unlocked the door and thre you backpack onto the kitchen counter, not caring that your laptop was in the bottom of the bag. you slowly made your accent up the stairs and into your room. 

your room was at the end of the hallway, you parents room was the next door down and your sisters’ room was next to them, across the halls was your brothers room. you sighed and pushed open your door revealing the room that was once full of life. the walls were painted grey and all of your exam papers were lying scattered acroos the floor. your clothes lied on a pile next to the bed and your art supplies was scattered across your desk, like it was a month ago. 

your bathroom looked spotless and clean, much different to your bedroom. you walked back into your bedroom and pulled up your phone, you had a binch of text messages from about 50 unknown numbers. you felt your heart finally shatter. you had never given anyone your number, and now the harrasment would never stop. you threw your phone onto your bed and slid down the wall, letting the tears fall freely. you couldn’t do it anymore. you didn’t have the energy, you just didn’t want to. it had taken everything you had to make it this far, and you just didn’t have the fight anymore, you let the rest of your tears fall before pulling yourself off your floor and sitting on the bed. feeling your phone vibrate you picked it up to see a message with a table. by closer look you saw a petition. not just any petitiion, a petition about you. the “Get Y/N Ackles to dye petition” that already contained 280 signatures, 

you stared at your phones screen, emotionless. it wasn’t untill you felt the phone vibrate again that you saw an incoming call from (Your best friend) you letit ring a bit hoping it would go away, before you lost your patience and slid the answer buttin across. 

“Y/N hey, hey, answer me, are you okay” asked your best friend in a panicked tone. 

‘i’m sorry” you wisper into the phone. 

“What are you sorry for, Y/N, tell me that your okay”. begged your best friend. 

“I’m sorry but i can’t do it anymore... i love you” you say letting more tears fall down your face. 

“NO Y/N stay on the line, come on , i need you, your so much stronger than this” begged (Your best friend). 

“Goodbye (best friend) i love you” you say hanging up the phone and pulling yourself into the bathroom.

slowly you walk yourself into the bathroom, and drag yourself infront of the mirror. 

“I’m sorry mum, dad, jj,(best friend) zeplin, arrow, but this isn’t the right place for me” you say, grabbing medication and a razor from the cupboard. wiht as much energy as you could muster you shover 2 hanfulls of pllis down your throat. after feeling your eyes drop, you dig the razor into your skin cutting the vain open and letting the blood pour freely. 

“I’m sorry, i’m sorry” you say before you drift off into the land of unconciousness.

xxxxxxx

your dad had just finished filming the final sceen when he felt his phone buzz, he pulled it out but didn’t recognize the number, knowing it was probably business he answered it anyway. 

“Hello, jensen ackles speaking” he said through the phone

“Mr ackels it’s (Best friend)” your father heard (best friend) through the phone. only it sounded like she was crying. 

“Hey (best friend) is everything okay” asked your father genuinly worried. 

“Have you been on instagram lately” she asked. 

“Not lately” he said. 

“Can you please have look” said (Your best friend) crying

you dad kept the call running while he opened instagram, what he saw broke his heart. he saw tones and tones of hate messages comments and posts about you. but the one thing that got to him most was a petition, saying for you to kill youself. 

“(best friend name) wheres charlotte” said your father starting to tear up. he hear (Your best friend) started sobbing. 

“I was on the phone to her just before, i think she’s going to commit suicide mr ackles, she hung up on me and won’t answer her phone” cried (your best friend) 

your father felt stupid. how did he not notice, he let the tears flow freely. 

“(Best friend) thank you so much” wispered your dad before hanging up the phone. and serching for another number 

“Hey jensen” said jared through the phone 

“Jared i need you to call an ambulance for our adress, Y/N is home and i got a call from her friend. you’re colser to home than we are, i think she’s going to comit suicide” said your father through the phone crying. 

“Okay, i’ll head over there noe, i’ll leave the kids with gen, just go to the hospital, i’ll go in the ambulance with her” said jared hanging up the phone. 

your dad walked over to your mum with tears running downhis face 

“j, whats wrong” asked your mum, worried, 

“It’s Y/N” 

XXXXX

Your head was heavy, your throat hurt more than anything, and your body felt like it had been dumped. you could hear the beeping of a mechine and imidiately knew you were in the hospital. 

“Y/N” you heard someone say from your bed. 

“Dad” you said opening your eyes and adjusting to the light. 

“Hey bug”. said your dad removing the mas from around your face so you could talk properly. You tried to sit but your dad pushed you back down. 

“Hey don’t move, you need to rest” said your dad pushing you back down and planting a kiss on your head

“You gave us a right good scare sweetie” said your mum grabbing your hand from the other side of the bed. recalling the previous events you started sobbing. 

“I’m sorry” you said your body shaking from the sobs. 

“No, no, don’t appologise, we should be the ones appologising”. said your dad brushing your hair away from your face. 

“but you didn’t do anything” you said. 

“We wern’t the parents you needed. we should have realised something was wrong. thats our job. if (best friend) hadn’t called your dad you wouldn’t be here” said your mum kissing your palm. 

“I’m sorry for scaring you. i just didn’t want to fight anymore” you said leaning into your fathers embrace. 

“ I understand that Y/N, but we need you. were always here to talk. we know that you didn’t talk to us because you thought with the others it was to much. but nothings ever to much. please don’t scare us. talk to us. we are always here” said your mum jumping on the other side of the bed. 

“I know” you said keeping your head down. 

“ were going to work through this together, you don’t have to be strong all the time, but you need to talk to us, deal” said your dad lifting your chin up. 

“Deal” You said smiling. 

“Good, we love you bug” said your mum planting a kiss on your head. 

Sirius black was actually the one who started the marauders.

Everyone be like no James started it.

Fuck that.Sirius would do anything to piss off his parents

And starting a friend group with sure to be Gryffindors was certainly going to do that

Originally Sirius started it off to annoy his parents

But soon he found out that these people were the closest thing he had to family. They accepted him for who he was.

That joke formed a forever friendship