whisper to your houseplants

Halloween season is upon us 👻🎃💀

so here's some things to watch out for with recreational drug use:

planning your day around drugs e.g "i'll give myself an extra half hour before heading out so i can get high first"

rapidly switching emotions around drugs. you love them but you hate that you love them so much. you hate the way you feel on them but you hate being sober. feeling guilty after using even when you didn't give a crap beforehand.

caring less about spending money. if you are budgeting for drugs like they are food, you are likely prioritizing them more than is healthy.

getting high to do household chores and other unpleasant things because it would suck less and be more bearable on drugs

feeling anxious or restless while sober, not knowing what to do with oneself, feeling lost or ungrounded.

thinking about doing drugs constantly even while sober. maybe it's the first thing you think of when you wake up. maybe when you're bored or otherwise have free time, drugs are one of the first things you can think of to occupy yourself with.

going to work or school while under the influence, especially if it happens regularly and if you're seeing your performance suffer as a result.

the idea of taking a 'tolerance break' sounds good to you until it's actually break time, at which point you can come up with 20 very reasonable sounding points to explain why it wouldn't benefit you actually and you should just keep doing drugs regardless.

even if you succeed at quitting the drug, you keep your dealer's number on your phone "just in case"

you pretend to be sober when you aren't. you worry about other people noticing how much time you spend high. you make efforts to hide your drug use or minimize how much other people think you're using. you're scared of other people's judgement if they were to find out.

you have mood swings laced with self-hatred, regret, financial worries, and guilt. these mood swings are then very quickly wiped away by feelings of "but it doesn't matter, i can do what i want, and clearly i'm doing just fine while using drugs frequently". news flash, if you are rapidly switching between feeling numb-ok and hating yourself more than anything because of your drug use, you are mentally ill.

"i would like to be remembered as somebody who lived well, loved well, was a seeker and his paramount thing is he wants to help people. that's what i want."

They’re finally finished and I’m so happy with them!!

Some progress shots:

“I've had a lot of ups and downs in my life. I'm still working through it personally, but the best thing about me is that if an alcoholic or drug addict comes up to me and says, 'Will you help me?' I will always say, 'Yes, I know how to do that. I will do that for you, even if I can't always do it for myself! So I do that, whenever I can. In groups, or one on one.

And I created the Perry House in Malibu, a sober-living facility for men. I also wrote my play The End of Longing, which is a personal message to the world, an exaggerated form of me as a drunk. I had something important to say to people like me, and to people who love people like me.

When I die, I know people will talk about Friends, Friends, Friends. And I'm glad of that, happy l've done some solid work as an actor, as well as given people multiple chances to make fun of my struggles on the world wide web...

but when I die, as far as my so-called accomplishments go, it would be nice if Friends were listed far behind the things I did to try to help other people.

I know it won't happen, but it would be nice.”

- Matthew Langford Perry

Happy black cat day!!

fan fiction has become too mainstream. it’s not meant to be something you talk about on The Voice, and you shouldn’t be reading fics on tik tok and hashtagging them so that millions and millions of people see them. because when that sort of thing happens, we get this push to sanitize everything - the RPF, the kink, the dark fic. this is the same fight as “there shouldn’t be kink at pride because uwu makes me uncomfy”. rpf, like all other fan fiction, is FICTION, and thus there are no moral lines in it about “well, it’s ok, but don’t write about them killing anyone” or “well, it’s fine, but don’t ship anyone underage.” y’all are the same as the book banners going to libraries and weeding out “objectionable” books, you’re just too caught up in “but it makes me feel weird” to realize it.