it's not my fault, it's how I'm programmed to function

𝑀𝑒𝑒𝓉 𝒮𝓊𝑔𝒶𝓇 𝑀𝑜𝓉𝓉𝒶

Santana: I'm making sure everyone knows this, but dibs on Sam.

Nope! I don't need help, I'm perf the way I am.

Everything else? My money is just the sprinkles on top of an already beautiful and deliciously stacked cupcake. 

Offensive that I tied with Raph. DOUBLE offensive that Mr Schue made the co-captains both Junior boys. Literally where is the variety and underclassmen representation? and then TRIPLE offensive that I got manager. I've seen School of Rock, jerks. I know it's where you put the girl who can't sing but will totally sue if you try to call her a groupie.

If I wasn't super into social media and the idea of being a musical manager, I'd totally be raising hell rn. 

• @goldstarraph - Unpleasant, unlikable and unfun. Him tying with cool people like me and Blaine was a joke.  

• @finnhuds - I have no opinion, none of us really questioned how Quinn got knocked up with a whole girlfriend either so I'm not going to call her dumb for that. 

• @kaithummel -we stan a look so I stan her! 

• @artieabrcms - Whomst

• @tinacc - So pretty, literally didn't have to send anyone any sexy selfies but I'm not mad she did!

• @quinnfcbray - She's cool! Sometimes she kind of looks like one of those Victorian dolls that line the walls of a child's room in a scary movie, but she's still crazy pretty.

• @fondueforbritt - QUEEN.

• @sntanalopez - I don't know if I'm just being gay about her or if I want to be her when I grow up, but Santana Lopez literally the best and coolest girl in glee club. I wish the cheerios didn't have uniforms because I just knoooow She'd serve fire looks daily.

• @npuck - "talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing, show stopping, spectacular, never the same, totally unique, completely not ever been done before, unafraid to reference or not reference"

• @mattrutherfcrd - Not to thirst on main but I am PARCHED and that man is out here looking like the coldest drink of water. 

• @michaelaschang - "Hey, queen! Girl, you have done it again, constantly raising the bar for all of us and doing it flawlessly."

• @josiestjames - WE GET IT. YOU WENT TO NATIONALS TWICE ALREADY.  WE'RE TRYING. SHUT UP. 

• @laurcnzizes - I like her! Confidence is sexy!

• @andersonb - Another cute and cool person! I'm going to be straight up and say he's the only actual Glee captain I'm going to listen to. 

Ryder: I thought that said 1990s for a second and was about to say that Id heard the 90s were back but then I read it right and haha 1910, good one. I like those shirts actually, the color sleeve ones! Maybe Ill wear some more of those even if its getting more into flannel weather. I remember the Super Bowls more than the stuff in between but I remember the nip slip i guess, what did JT have to do with it though? I just remember pictures of Janet.

Ryder: I said it so it kind of is? And I know the band but I never paid attention to what they wore, just how much I Will Wait slapped. You know what, you know fashion better than I do, so what shirts do look good on me then? I honestly dont know what he did with Britney and Janet, but Man of the Woods was the one with Filthy in it, right? That was a weird choice. He just looks like a normal famous white guy to me, sorry! I guess his hair is kind of unique?

Ryder: Idk, it was just like a saying! I dont get that reference but no haha Im not, I just know what shirts look good on me! But even if you want to get rid of that one I'm at four and thats good enough for me. Wait, why is JT 🤢🤢🤢? What did he do?

Ryder: I didnt think youd ask, I didnt have them picked out already haha but uh maybe good taste in henleys, music, cute people, and movies? Maybe? And fun dance moves so thats at least five! I havent and now I wont, thanks! It is! Madison suggested Can't Stop the Feeling, what do you think of that one? Is it a good energy match?

Ryder: Hey now, I like to think I have good taste in at least four things, but I'll take it for now. Whats wrong with your thoughts? I like mine half the time 😂 haha I never wouldve thought of her as a bitmoji but thats perfect. Yeah no your right, Sunflower is at like a five and Pocketful is like an eight or nine. Maybe Walking on Sunshine?

Puck: yeah, i guess.

Puck: she is nice. too nice.

Puck: yeah, it was pretty funny.

Puck: i miss her.

Sugar: Since no one guessed Kitty, I'm giving you the money by default since you're the only one who volunteered other than Blaine 🤗

Ryder: I was just watching Easy A, that's why I said that! How is an ear worm not anoying, it leaves you humming it all day 😂 ive never seen Lala Land but a playlist about sun songs like a good place to start! What about that Sunflower song from Spiderman Into the Spiderverse? Or is that too slow?

Ryder: I don't know about you guys but you can't really get more "songs about togetherness" than doing a mashup, right? Anyone have any ideas about songs that could mash up with Pocketful of Sunshine that make it less annoying maybe?

Week 12: Scandal

"I don't really get into scandals and drama like that? I'm simply too pretty. But I really wanted to participate this week, so I'm picking a song with a really messy backstory that you're all free to google for yourselves if you want. But mostly this performance is like a demonstration of exactly why I'll make a great glee captain. I can't sing so I'm showing teamwork and good taste by giving the solo spotlight to Blaine, who I know can actually rock it, while I'll be accompanying him on guitar!"

It's a pretty standard performance if you can ignore Sugar with a heart shaped electric guitar trying her best to live out some random Orianthi fantasy next to Blaine, they both sound good, she's just the most extra person alive about it.

After it's over she tells everyone to look under their chairs (or Wastebasket for Artie) where there are Goodie bags with "VOTE FOR SUGAR" labeled on front and a smaller "(Or Blaine)" sticker pasted on front as an after thought. Inside there's a lot of candy, a Vote for Sugar button with "or blaine" scrawled underneath in thin tipped permanent marker, and a hundred dollar gift card for the local salon.

Michaela: Yeah, sorry about that. I would've messaged you sooner but I saw the word Glist and went into "ignore" mode. Are you actually going to pay someone if they find out who it was?

Michaela: You could use leadership to lead us to a place of not caring about it? There's power in refocusing on what matters. If all the other elects are focused on drama but you're focused on making our team better, you'll stand out in a good way.