|⟨Karisei⟩|

Perkara Tubuh is a song written by Hindia or Baskara. Was released back in 2023 in his second part of his album with the title of Lagipula Hidup Akan Berakhir (Life will End Anyway).

In this song, he talked about feeling of unconformity and anxiousness towards his body -- or we can say, it's like body dysmorphia, a person with low self-esteem for their body.

"And I have great respect for those who are comfortable with their own bodies.”

That's what he said back in the interview with Kumparan.

You can listen to Perkara Tubuh on Spotify, and if you pay attention to the last lyrics of the song. You can hear Baskara said, “Aku tak nyaman dengan batinku/Kau juga kabari jika begitu” or in English is:

“I’m not comfortable with my heart/You also let me know if that’s the case”

He shared a positive message and he tried to let us know that we didn't suffer alone.

And let's talk about the draw that I made back in September '24

I always... ALWAYS hate myself for my own body. Sometimes maybe I look good, and most of the times I don't. People might say, I'm pretty just to boost up my confidence, but deep down in my heart I know that I don't.

I hate myself so much, I want to kill myself for my own body that I have.

I've been lived for more than 2 decades, have met so many nice and wonderful people.

So kind... so pure, yet I don't think I ever deserve any of them.

I'm not talking about deserving as a partner, more like, "Did I deserve to meet them?" I've got so many friends, coworkers, families and so on. Yet, there's an empty space in my heart.

"People come and go."

I know and surprisingly, I don't even think when people leaving me, because I know that I'm not a person that worth to stay for.

Until this person arrived into my stagnant life...

I always thought he's a home, as he always remind me of my family, friends and of course myself.

It's been a year... and... I don't think that I can manage to stay. Ironic, isn't it?

He wants me to be like his preferences, which I'm not the one that he prefers.

So the question, is it worth it to stay for a person that wants you to be someone else?

Years have passed without knowing that I ever made this account for my aesthetic needs,

guess the last time I posted something here since the pandemic, which is back in 2019-2021. When I really need a place to express my feelings towards something especially if it is beautiful.

Thank you, for being my safe space. I love you.

-san01

when you're scared.

Avoid it, hide and run.

It's okay to be weak. You don't have to be strong.

Because, that's part of being human.

But someday,

if you want to go back.

If you find a reason to return.

Gathering like this, scattering like that

And drown yourselves in stagnant happiness?

— Wozwald - Flower.·.

— Illust - WOOMA

"When I the beaming smile of my customers. I feel glad that I stuck with it.

So, even if it's exhausting

I can keep doing it."

These shots

This chapter

This whole damn manga

2. The dark spot switches from person to person.

3. Everyone is the dark spot.

After few volumes, they're finally looking at each other.

"It is full of answers."

USB1

USB2