(Insert hipsterish title here)

i was on the train and 3 drunk girls saw me and said i had nice brown eyes so they sang “brown eyed girl” to me

I threw up at a frat party and I was crying in the bathroom and a drunk girl went upstairs to get me a shirt and came back with a sweater and a kitten.

At the last party I went to three drunk girls fishtail braided my hair by committee

a drunk girl drew an eye on the back of my hand and then patted it with satisfaction and  whispered “count olaf”

once at a barbecue a drunk girl gave the surgical scar on my shoulder a butterfly kiss and said “you’re cured”

A drunk girl at a bar I was at became worried that I wasn’t getting enough nutrition and proceeded to hold peanuts to my lips and just keep saying “peanut peanut” until I would eat it. And after I allowed her to feed me a peanut she pet my hair and said “Thank you”.

Drunk girls, saving your life one wtf at a time.

Girls are a fucking gift don’t let anyone tell you otherwise

me when i conclude an essay with an obvious empical fact bc my argument has nothing to stand on and it’s 1am

damn. he did that 😳

…………continue

i almost spit out my water lolol

I WAS JUST TALKING ABOUT THIS WITH MY GIRLFRIEND I CANT BREATHE

one of my favorite creepy stories on the internet. I remember the first time I read this, it terrified me. Not just the haunting part, but the idea that either someone was fucking with this guy or whatever’s left of his dead lover is suffering.

WANT.

I’ll let the bad parts in, the bad parts in.