Our Interests Lie Elsewhere
Note: This has also been posted on AO3 under the same user and title. It is my work.
The announcement of the Admiralβs arrival had created quite a stir around the town square. Everybody knew about it, from the highest lords to the scullery maids and women for hire, all gossipping about who this gentleman could be. Recently retired from the Navy under mysterious circumstances, by the Queen herself, many wondered why he was so young and in his situation.
It just so happened that his arrival coincided with the opening of the season and therefore Lady Danburyβs soiree, held at her country house, not too far outside the city. Almost everybody had been invited, and all who had, had accepted instantly, excited to see potential debutantes or suitors, and perhaps even a glimpse of the mysterious gentleman himself.
Benedict had never been one to truly enjoy these events, not in the sense that many others did, hoping to find someone to court. He enjoyed it for the drama instead, and only went for those reasons, knowing he would never be able to anything else. Courting had never been an option. It was something he outrightly refused to do; after all, how was it fair to the woman who ended up with him when he couldnβt give her what she wanted?
It is to say that his interests lay elsewhere.
His sisters had promised him that this season would be the one where he finds someone, though he couldnβt tell them otherwise, choosing to keep that part of him to himself and the parties held by his dear friends across town.
The night was soon underway though, and Benedict found himself enjoying the company of a glass of lemonade and dancing with his sister, who seemed ever so uncomfortable at the idea of dancing with frumpy old men (he himself shuddered at the thought).
Laughter and conversation filled the room, accompanied by the orchestra that sat playing different dances on the stage set up at the end of the room. Everything felt normal and proper, just as a season filled with very little drama should have been.
Then he walked in, unaccompanied and a cane by his side.
Benedict could not help but stare. Neither could anyone else really, for it was the Admiral himself, dressed in his uniform, looking ever so handsome. The men fell into feelings of jealousy and disappointment and the women swooned, blushing hard as they fanned themselves and giggled amongst one another.
That was until they saw his face.
Scars ran their way from his collar to his hairline, covered only slightly by the brown hair that fell there. They looked angry and red, and people looked away as though they themselves might catch this physical affliction should they stare too long.
But Benedict could not tear his eyes away. There was something about the man that drew him in, and left him floundering for air as he drained his drink and whisked another off the tray of a passing footman, whose head was lowered, should he too be caught staring at the Admiral.
Slowly the man walked about the room, sticking to the outskirts as the music continued and the dances began again. It was like a ghost passing by- some unknown forces clearing a path as people moved and bent to his will, not truly realising what they were doing. He hardly made a sound and yet Benedict felt as though he heard it all and knew that he would want to hear it everyday until he died.
A wisp of envy settled itself in Benedictβs heart as he watched Lady Danbury making her way over, prepared to introduce her ward, Miss Emmeline Dupont, from France. He drew closer, feigning interest in a painting on the wall, though not uncommon for him to do so, reprimanding himself for giving into such jealous acts of eavesdropping.
βAdmiral! It is wonderful to have you here.β
He watched as the Admiral kissed both of their hands, delicate and with his eyes lowered, as though uncomfortable at the idea of social interaction or the possibility of being pawned off as a possible suitor.
βMy name is Lady Danbury, and this here is my ward, Miss Emmeline Dupont.β She ushered the younger girl forward slightly, forcing her closer to the man.
The young girl spoke, her accent lilting and prominent. βIt is a pleasure to meet you, Admiralβ¦β She trailed off, not knowing the name of the man she had just been propositioned to.
βAdmiral Cyrus Adair, Miss Dupont. And it is a pleasure to meet you too. Both of you.β Benedict disguised a laugh with a cough as he watched the man speak out of the corner of his eye, grimacing as he spoke those words.
One can imagine his surprise when the other man looked up at him, eyes sharp and inquisitive.
Cursing his curiosity and insatiable desire to know the man more, Benedict quickly turned away, yet again feigning interest in other pictures further away from the handsome man, hoping to make an escape to the garden and fresh air, where he could clear his head and return to some of his senses.
It was pure luck that the terrace was empty and he could drop ungraciously into one of the chairs, head in hands as he groaned, frustrated with himself.
βAre you alright? You left in such a rush that I didnβt have the chance to speak to you.β The voice startled him, knocking him out of his state of self-admonishment. His eyes flashed upwards, taking in the figure of the man who had caused him to fall into such a way, leaning on his cane.
The voice that was usually so witty and sharp suddenly caught in his throat and he found it difficult to breathe under the gaze of the hazel eyes. At last he found it though, and steadied himself before speaking. βYes, I am quite alright. Forgive me I just needed some air. Sometimes it can be quite stifling in a room full of overbearing mothers and debutantes throwing themselves at any available man.β
Cyrus huffed out a laugh, settling himself in the chair beside Benedict, much more gracefully than he had done so. βI understand. Though, I didnβt happen to notice anyone throwing themselves at you. I canβt begin to fathom why.β A sly smile spread across his face, eyes glittering as he watched the other become flushed.
Benedict stuttered, βI- Well- Yes, Iβve been a rake since my first season. Itβs been long enough that many have given up trying to court the second Bridgerton brother. My interests lie elsewhere, you see.β He stopped sharply, realising what he had just confessed outloud to a total stranger, despite knowing full well where he could end up should it be revealed to anyone of authority, and panic began to set in as his new companion sat silent.
It was just like him to go and ruin what could have possibly been a friendship, by opening his mouth and not thinking before he spoke. What a friendship it would have been though, his unrequited feelings would eventually burn him until there was nothing remaining but ashes.
βYou know, we are in agreement there too Mr Bridgerton. I have found that many years in the Navy have led me down a similar path. Perhaps we could discuss it sometime? Maybe in a more private setting?β
The night was a night of surprises for Benedict and he found himself feeling extremely cast out with the emotional turmoil that he had put himself through. Never in a million years had he expected the Admiral to be in the same situation as himself and it took a moment for his brain to catch up to the questions he had just been asked.
βO-Of course. I would love that very much indeed. May I suggest afternoon tea at my house tomorrow?β He had suggested tomorrow because he didnβt think he could wait any longer to see the man again, curious to know more about what the dashing exterior hid.
βVery well; afternoon tea it is.β
It appeared to Benedict that perhaps these events were good for something besides drama.
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