★ ˖ ࣪ ♱ 𝐒𝐇𝐀𝐃𝐘 ♱ ˖ ࣪ ★

the freak circus. you absolutely adored the game. played the game so many times that you were sure you could recite the game dialogue. you subscribed to the creator’s patreon. not only that? you love every single one of them. literally. the tabs on your phone were filled with much fanfiction waiting for an update. your likes on tumblr was literally just the freak circus alone. drawn them in little doodles to even write random headcannons of them. you were consumed into the fandom and always refreshing every page in hopes someone would post something of the five members that had consumed your every waking moment. imagining literal depravity with each and every one of them. the basic things of every person who was a fan of an 18+ game.

the thing was that you did not expect to open your eyes and witness a familiar scene such as this. the chill nipping against your skin. your eyes scanned the scene in front of you. from the cracks along the building. to the many familiar flyers littered across the ground. people were walking and consumed in their daily life. this… this was a little too real. you gaze down your brown apron, seeing your name plastered across the name badge. you hesitantly approached a pole, holding on the flyer. the freak circus of horrors. it was just like the game. it was too vivid. too… real. that you slapped your cheeks over and over. then you realised that this was entirely real. that she got ❛ isekai ❜ into the world of her favourite game. 

you would expect this was amazing. perfect! great! but the realisation hit you like a freight train. the actual idea of someone actually stalking and breaking into your apartment? albeit, pierrot was attractive but the actual implication that everything was real dawned upon you. ❛ of fucking course… ❜

❝ hey!! get out of here weirdo!! ❞ a voice bellowed before the sound of a possible punch rang out throughout the street. you whipped your head to the direction of the noise. your breath hitches when you see the familiar figure of pierrot. oh sweet beautiful pierrot. ❛ no! don’t think of it! don’t even consider it! ❜ you internally yelled at yourself. ❝ ever since you guys showed up, people have been disappearing! go back to whatever hellhole you crawled out of! ❞ the man yelled. you took in the appearance of the unknown man. seeing how he was a balding man, pot bellied and face flushed. ❛ yeesh— that man id definitely drunk ❜ you thought to yourself. but you remembered how this whole disappearance of many had happened even prior to them even arriving in the town. though you couldn’t help but curse at the mc for being so disinterested in the news?? like you hear about people disappearing and you do not pay attention??

❝ i’m talking to you, you freak! get out of our town ❞ you watched the pot bellied man raised his fist. ❛ turn away, turn away and head to work, you idiot ❜ but because you have actual empathy, you jumped in between the man and pierrot. feeling his fist connect to your cheek. you flinched. ❛ fuck that hurt ❜, you were milliseconds a little late. you glared at the man. ❝ that’s enough! you did not need to get so violent. he is just doing his job! ❞ you were almost reciting the words, word for word. ❝ working for the devil, maybe ❞ he huffed. as you glared at him, ❝ i am calling the police. i can report you for assault ❞ you pointed your finger at him. causing the man to back away, ❝ screw that! open your eyes, i hope they take you too ❞ he growled as the man backed away fast. ❛ i hope the fuck not ❜

you turned to pierrot. keeping your hands to yourself. knowing that you should offer your hand. watching him stand. ❛ damn, they were not joking about him being really tall ❜ you thought to yourself. you had to deescalate the situation! you crossed your arms. ❝ you should be careful, you know! some people are kind of hot headed! better not get too close to people ❞ you tried to sound like you were scolding him with an undertone of concern. watching as he nodded. you nodded back. you wanted to give him a bandaid but you stopped yourself. you also got punched and your cheek would start swelling. ❝ well, i gotta go or i’ll be late. be careful next time ❞ you stepped back and held back waving at him before heading your way. 

❛ you screwed up. you really screwed up. ❜ you thought as you arrived at the cafe. which took awhile but you got there. seeing your boss. you almost was hyper vigilant. noting how he had heterochromia to his dragon arm tattoo. ❝ you got here just in time. it’s busier than usual with the cold ❞ he spoke. ❝ start as soon as you can, carol’s running late and i’ve been covering for her ❞ he added. while you flinched a bit at the name of carol. you know where she was, you know she was possibly mind controlled by jester and was working as a fool. with her mask, the ticket taker definitely was the one who brought her to the circus. though he had noted you injury and offered to bandaged you up. after following the basic dialogue, you were carrying the coffees to the customers. hearing the same dialogue you were so used to hearing.

but you noticed… in each window after every customer interaction… you saw it. in the first window, there was fog with three hearts that faded soon after. the second time, you nearly had a jumpscare because your soul almost left your body with him peering through the window from in the corner of your eye before heading disappeared once again. then the huge shadow on the first window again of pierrot. ❛ haha. i am so dead ❜ you thought to yourself. while picking up all the flyers that were littered across the tables. even before your boss even suggested you to do so. maybe you should keep one. scrap book it.

until your heart sank… the next event. you turned to the door before the man in blue came in. ❝ welcome! ❞ you automatically spoke out. the perks of working in hospitality. ❝ thanks! i’d like a strong hot coffee ❞ he smiled while you head to the counter. ❝ i’ll bring it right away ❞ you spoke while you were trying not to shake. 

❝ here’s your coffee ❞ you forced a smile. ❛ oh. this is definitely ticket taker ❜ you thought to yourself. ❝ thanks. it’s really cold outside ❞ ticket taker thanked you. like you knew what they were going to say. ❝ what’s with those flyers? ❞ he added. which forced a smile. ❝ someone was handing them out. i had to pick them all up ❞ you smiled. even though it was a dream to talk to ticket taker but currently, you were screaming and yelling ❛ no no no— god no ❜. ❝ how rude to do that in a place of business, right? ❞ he spoke which made you contain yourself from rolling your eyes because they were all his and the circus workers! following the dialogue soon after. 

he then offered that doomed ticket. the pink ticket. ❛ haha. i am not taking that. that is like a instant death ticket ❜. ❝ that’s really kind, but i’m honestly not interested in the circus ❞ she gave him a polite smile. ❝ that’s a shame. i’ll try giving it to someone else, then ❞ he uttered. before he left. leaving her in the cafe alone for a moment. 

"I do...!" Your words come out a bit more desperate. "You... You know you should go enjoy looking at a pretty tree. It's one of the few things you've actually been invited to so—"

"Yes, as your plus one." He needs to...! Unfortunately, going with him to this event is just too... romantic. You can't bear thinking of it that way while he just views it as friendship! It's so demeaning...! And and...! It would really suck, not just for you. There would be some empty pain in you knowing you want something more with Malleus, fated to never have it because of his position. But, it sucks for him too.

He just wants a friend and... You don't really want to be his friend. You want to be something else entirely. Probably not what he needs.

"It's okay. You know they're not going to kick you out just because I'm not there." You fake a cough as the breeze blows by. Malleus steps in the direction the wind comes, his back effectively shielding it from hitting you anymore. "... It's a once every 10 year thing, It'd be nice to see it."

"I can live long enough to see it again." He mentions it casually, and yet... disappointingly. "... It's a pixie dust tree, I will see it very often, whether in town or not."

"Then... You should see it for me." You remember his hand is still on your forehead. It's only when you grab onto it that he remembers it's there. "If you see it, you can tell me, and it would be like I saw it too." You avoid mentioning phones. You doubt he would figure out how to record the sight anyway. His eyes watch as you bring his hand down, your cold fingers leaving his limb even cooler than it was before. But, he doesn't mind.

"Are you sure? I do not mind devoting my time to you. I would never mind it." You can feel your heart beat faster at the phrase. But you remember that he cares deeply for everyone he knows. It's not exactly special. "... I do not mind taking care of you." His fingers trace over the ring on your finger. He's about to reach out before you step into your doorway.

"I'll be fine, just go before the event starts."

"..."

Malleus watches as you disappear behind the door. Taking a minute to stare at the glass before walking away.

"..."

"Now, why would you do that?"

"... He makes me nervous." For a moment, you and your companion are left silently staring at each other. You come to an agreement when both of you sigh in unison. "Sorry, I don't really know what to do when it comes to that guy..."

"You could've accepted it?" The ghost floats aimlessly above you as you rub your arms, finding frictional warmth.

"Well... Yeah, but no."

"And why is that?"

"He wants to be friends. And I... don't really want to be. It means for both of us—" You stop when cold air waves on your left hand, looking to the side at a pouting specter. "What...?"

"You have a ring on your left ring finger."

"... Yeah...?"

"Who'd you get it from?"

"Malleus...? Where are you going with this exactly—"

"... and this necklace too?" He points at your chest. "You know, dragons use shiny stuff as a courting ritual—"

"Oh, I am not listening to this." You leave before he can finish, fake coughing all the way up to your room. "I am sick get away from me!"

"And I'm already dead! Now listen to me he definitely wants you—"

You groan at the bright light that shines through your window. Seriously... You live on the second floor, and it's night. Where is it even coming from...?

It's changing colors, while pretty, are frankly getting on your nerves. But with each step you take closer to your window, you realize the shifting hues are similar to the... tree in town. And also... flex of gold shift through the air, as if fairies were flying.

There's... this is a joke right?

You change your strides to be faster, your body hitting the windowsill.

The ground is riddled with dirt, as the root rests on top of the ground. But there it is.

... On your front lawn...

"Do you like it?" Malleus suddenly appears beside you, sitting on your ledge. "Since you couldn't come to town, I thought I could just bring the event to you." Your silence has him turning his head, his gaze focused on the way the leaves' lights shine on your face.

"Yeah... I do." You snap out of your trance when fingers touch your skin, looking over to see Malleus swiping away the collar of your clothes. "... Malleus...?" You're shushed when he kisses your shoulder, a soft smile on his lips.

"I wished to spend the New Year's with my dearest, Child of Man." The finger adorned with your ring tingles at his words.

"You... Like me?" Your sentence comes out more awkward than intended, but it's obvious either way would've led to Malleus quirking his eyebrows.

"Of course I do. We are engaged, are we not?" His hands take hold of your left, his black nails gently rubbing over the gem.

"We are...?" Even through the confusion, fairy dust seems to continue scattering through the air. "... I thought you just saw me as a friend..."

"I gave you a wedding ring."

"... Thought it was just a gift."

"I gave you the richest of treasures."

"More gifts."

"I told you I love you several times."

"I thought you were just that type of friend...?"

A beat of silence passes. Several do, and the changing colors of the leaves support this fact. You're about to apologize before you hear quiet laughs, the prince's hair draping over his face as he turns his head down. Malleus remains turned down, his eyes focused solely on your finger.

"Do you feel the same way?"

"I..."

...

Malleus takes hold of your waist, his fingers grasping the clothes on your skin as your arms wrap around his neck. You didn't really expect to be kissing the same fae you claimed had no feelings for you mere hours after saying it.

When you push him away, his lips continue chasing after yours. It's only when he remembers you need to breathe does he separate.

"Malleus... Hold on." You're struck with a realization, your head turning to look at the fairy dust tree. The gold glitter still adorns its leaves as they change hues.

"Yes?"

"Did... Did you rip out the tree?"

"I did. It wasn't very hard to do—" He trails off when you softly hit his chest.

"You realize that tree was the entire event in town, right?"

"Yes? Because of that, I wanted to experience it as you."

"... I have a feeling someone is going to arrive soon." You watch as Malleus furrows his brows, and an obvious obliviousness in his iris.

You both separate when a frantic knocking is heard, Crowley yelling at you to answer your front door.