excerpts from my journal

i love how books give you this indescribable power and turn you into a storyteller when you’re actually the one the story’s being told to. it’s like you are writing the story as you read, even though it’s written. like it won’t be completed until you finish it. you’re somehow the master puppeteer but also the audience of this grand spectacle and i think it’s beautiful.

i just needed to forget about you so i could forget that i cannot have you

my best friend only ever uses yellow hearts when she texts and i do the same with purple ones because purple is her favourite colour and yellow is mine. if pure love really does exist this is the closest i’ve come to feeling it.

i’m so genuinely scared of the calloway sisters movie/show adaption because the cast can never ever compare to the fancast and the place they have in our hearts

to be honest, i just want to have kids so i can tuck them into bed as i read harry potter to them and see their eyes twinkle with wonder. is that too much to ask?

an hour of scrabble with white wine, blankets and kisses in between is literally all i’m asking for

when we get enchanted (taylor’s version) produced by jack antonoff then what?

boggart- a word i learned when i was thirteen. when i was lost, yet again, in the pages of a world i longed for, in the corridors of sweet fiction. a boggart takes form of your worst fear-it is the sum of nothingness- splits you open to inspect and haunts you like a nightmare. a boggart is a fear you birth. a boggart lives in the closet of my mind. a shape shifter that digs it’s claws into my hopes and gives me filtered darkness- in form of a rainy street in paris that i never get to walk. a stone walled university i never get into. a brown eyed boy in the library aisles that i never meet. that one long love- neither reciprocated nor fully denied the warm walls of a home soon to go cold and dry. the scattered misfits i gathered, going their own ways again. the love from family never being paid back in full returns. of never finding peace. of never knowing love. of never getting there.of never resting.