sup homes?

Lately I haven’t been able to control my emotions.

I’ve been spontaneously crying at least once a day, for no reason.

I’ve been thinking about all the reasons, what makes my heart break a little further each day.

Maybe it’s not even you, or your perfect everything.

Maybe it’s not even the way you look at me or say my name.

Maybe it’s not even the way your eyes disappear into your face when you laugh or smile.

Maybe it’s not even the way your voice makes my day, every day.

Maybe it’s not even your random phone calls.

Maybe it’s not even your thoughtless need to inform me of all those other girls you have lined up, either in front or behind me.

Maybe it’s not even your rejection or non-acceptance of the person I am.

Maybe it’s me, my fear of abandonment, my constant need to fix what my childhood ripped up.

Maybe it’s not even you, maybe it’s just me.

Maybe I cry ‘cos I can’t tell you all of this.

Maybe I cry ‘cos I’m scared you’ll leave me if I tell you how I feel, ‘cos everyone else did.

Maybe I’m scared you won’t stay.