String Theory

Like, what do you mean you see someone ONCE and instantly think OH I WANT TO SPEND THE REST OF MY LIFE WITH THAT PERSON TAKE MY HEART

I also don’t get unrequited love

because she’s not just his investment anymore.

Favorite Ships

Kaz x Inej from Six of Crows—I think you guys know that i just really love this book but they are the best couple ever and even more so because they coexist and are just perfect together without being super physically intimate, and they are taking things really slow and its amazing.

Wylan x Jesper from Six of Crows—they are just really cute ok.

Ravi x Pip—this is probably the healthiest relationship on this list, but they are REALLY cute and i love how he calls her Sarge and how he protects her and how the case starts to mean more to her as soon as he enters the picture.

Nick x Judy from Zootopia—i really love this ship dynamic in general (the you-have-something-i-want-so-we-have-to-work-together-oh-wait-nevermind-ill-die-for-you dynamic) and they are SO funny. Like she is twice as chaotic but his cynicism is amazing. They’re perfect. and THE WAY HE LOOKS AT HER

Hazel x Augustus from A Fault In Our Stars—doomed romance? yes please. So so sad but so so good.

Eugene x Rapunzel from Tangled—again, the ship dynamic, the snarky-but-actually-really-messed-up thief. peak. (I think i have a type guys)

Veronica x JD from Heathers—idk why they broke up but it made me really sad! This guy was willing to kill for her and die for her and yes i am still delusional about his sociopathic tendencies (he was perfect ok dont talk to me)

Kaine Ferron x Helena Marino from Alchemised—the ANGST. the ROMANCE. I cried so hard over them; they’re far from perfect, but i think they sort of figured it out in the end…(?) i love them.

Least Favorite Ships

Any of the Prince Charming x Disney princess ships—yuck. no. enough said.

Jameson x Avery from Inheritance Games—she should have ended up with Grayson. Also they are ALL OVER EACH OTHER like yuck. 6 feet away, leave room for Jesus, whatever catchphrase you need to use but stop kissing each other.

Miranda x Andy from A Devil Wears Prada—whoever thought this up should be Sached (pun intended but i am not joking. There is nothing there, it’s a gross dynamic, and just eughh no).

any ship from The Picture of Dorian Gray—Dorian x Basil, Dorian x Alan, Henry x Dorian, Dorian x Sybil please just NO. These are all just dark and unhealthy relationships and while i understand the context of the novel i still hate it

Hi Person,

Hope this email finds you well! I acknowledge your message!

Thank you,

Because that is SO AWKWARD.

And for the times when you read the email and just assume that they know you received it, but then they ask you IN PERSON a couple days later if you got it and you have to say “I forgot to reply,” which makes you sound like an irresponsible immature person.

Imagine how much easier it would be if you could just thumbs-up the message. You wouldn’t forget to reply, you wouldn’t have to concoct a whole separate email that gives you severe social anxiety, rsvping for school/work events could just be ‘thumbs-up if you’re coming’ instead of another stupid email or WORSE a google form…

Music majors: none of the practice rooms were open so I couldn’t practice

Philosophy majors: did I do the homework on nihilism? nope. Nothing matters anyway.

Computer science majors: it WORKED on my LAPTOP

Art majors: I painted a gorgeous painting but then my friend drew all over it so I couldn’t bring it to class

Engineering majors: the robot ate it

Ceramics majors: it exploded in the kiln

I realized my mistake only after I’d paid.

anyway i felt very hardcore drinking my black iced coffee and pretending that i was the type of person who enjoys aesthetic suffering

Six of Crows—THE BEST. PEAK. Every character has a unique backstory and personality. 10/10 no notes

Game of Thrones (ASOIAF #1)—this book needs more diversity bc then maybe everyone will stop sleeping with their cousins. or their twin :) 4/10 for the distinct cultures/regions/worldbuilding and the fact that Daenerys finally figured it out #girlpower

The Inheritance Games—my favorite characters here were Libby and Max, but honestly 3/10. When the romantic options for the mc are all related something has definitely gone wrong. the tropes were awful too.

The Devil Wears Prada—I love the idea of a nerdy girl bumbling into a hotshot NYC job at a premier fashion magazine, but she ends up becoming another one of the same high-heeled, fashion-obsessed Clackers that she once hated. Everyone in this book was the same except for the mc (kind of) and Miranda Priestly. 5/10

Project Hail Mary—centers mostly around one guy, but it’s funny, involves the world working together, and also alien representation. 7/10. Also Eva Stratt is a girl boss.

Shogun—I only read the first part bc his portrayal of women and Japanese people in general was awful. 1/10.