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in his last year in boston, ilya calls shaneโs number a lot, mostly to listen to his boring voicemail message:
hi, youโve reached shane hollander. iโm sorry i canโt take your call right now. iโll get back to you as soon as i can. thank you!
one night, with the bribe of a lot of soft kisses, shane finally finds out why he always has so many missed calls from ilya.
โyour voice makes me relaxed, shane,โ ilya tells him. โis like youโre talking to me. iโi miss you, a lot.โ
so shane records a new voicemail greeting every week, referencing something he loves about ilya, or jokes that only ilya could understand.
it became their little secret.
and yuna wonders why shane, who has never changed his voicemail message since he first got a cellphone, is suddenly doing all this.
shane cockwarming ilya this, shane cockwarming ilya thatโฆ this fandom tends to forget that ilya is a throat goat and freaking loves to suck a dick, he swallows cause he โdoes not mindโ (i.e. moans harder when shane cums down his throat than shane himself.. you know - the person cumming)
add to it that ilya loves resting his head in peoples laps, getting his hair played with.. and has an oral fixation
so what i am saying is that ilya loves, loves, LOVES! cockwarming shane - sometimes they just chill on the couch, watching a renovation show or a movie ilya isnโt particularly interested in so while he rests his head in shaneโs lap he simply turns around, tugs shaneโs sweats down and puts shaneโs cock in his mouth
they stay like that for a long time, ilya gets all floaty and sleepy bc shaneโs hand is stroking through his hair, lightly scratching at his scalp and his cock is in his mouth
when ilya gets antsy again he starts sucking him off and gets him to come quickly, swallowing at the end of course and goes back to cockwarming him if shane wants to continue watching his show
heโs so happy to drive a zamboni
Dropping the latest Sketch-a-Wish, voted on by my lovely Patreon members for the month of February! (Still behind, but catching uuuup) Featuring Will and Tessa from the Infernal Devices by Cassie Clare, precariously sneaking a smooch before the inevitable plot interruption!
Gosh there so much detail on her dress that's being covered up by the balcony rail, but perfectly set up for a possible animated version - always good to have that prepped!

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Im gonna lock in in August so hard you dont even knowwwww <- lying
shane looooovesss shaping ilyaโs curls into hearts. the problem is they are curls, so a tiny action could send all his work to waste at once, so both shane and ilya has to be very very still for this whole ordeal. usually shane would find curls that already sort of faces each other and guide them to the desired position, but sometimes the curls beat him and he has to find another one. my point is, one time shane makes a whole head of heart curls (this is an exaggeration, he probably made 5 sporadically) on ilya and he snaps a photo of it. it has ilyaโs lovesick eyes looking at him too and so it becomes shaneโs homescreen wallpaper (his lockscreen is them hoisting the cup together, thank you very much).
they have a fun interview with harris one day and harris asks to see their lock and home screen photos. it goes semi viral on hockey twt and one of the most popular rt was โrozโs ass down horrendously bad for his husband his hair is proclaiming love lmfaoโ. that was retweeted by bood, accidentally, after laughing and showing it to cassie.
Hayden is invited to one of Bood's barbeques some time down the line. It's a nice evening and the Centaurs are good people. But Hayden can't shake this weird feeling of unfamiliarity all night. And at first he chalks it up to him being at a Bood barbeque the first time, hanging out with a team that isn't his. And so he always ends up looking for Shane in the crowd because that's his best friend, that's his familiar person. Except the feeling doesn't go away as he watches Shane throughout the evening.
Shane is playing with the curls at Ilya's neck. He's laughing at a joke from Luca. He rolls his eyes at a chirp from Ilya who in turn presses an exaggerated kiss to his cheek. He's playing mario kart with Wyatt and Young at some point, all of them yelling and swearing loudly. He's holding Ilya's hand in both of his. He's talking to Harris about going back to the restaurant they went to the other day, you guys want to join us? He's hooking his ankle over Ilya's. He's beaming at Harris as he takes a picture of the couple. He's grinning at something Ilya whispers to him in Russia.
After dinner, Hayden's standing on the patio with a beer in his hand watching as Shane and Ilya chase each other around Bood's yard, a spectacle that is accompanied by loud cheers from the rookies that are watching them. At one point Shane full on tackles Ilya and they end up on the grass laughing and wrestling. Wyatt whoops and shouts "Hollzy Rozy wrestling championship back the fuck on!" joining the rookies, half of them chanting "Rozy" while the other is chanting "Hollzy".
And suddenly the weird feeling takes on a painful shape. Because it's not the team or the house that's causing this deep sense of unfamiliarity. It's seeing Shane, happy and carefree with his boyfriend and his friends in a way that Hayden has never really seen before.
REAL FANS SAVE BANDS
REAL BANDS SAVE FANS
Water Feature, San Francisco -- July 15th, 2024
Etsy

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Kit gets jealous in a suicidal way and ty gets jealous in a murderous way
somewhere right now in toronto they're bolting a chair to the floor for the trophy room scene never kill yourself babe
i don't see nearly enough people talking about how shane, wyatt, and bood are going to be such a fun trio on the cens. like on montreal shane's best friends were dumbass extraordinaire hayden pike and slightly more observant slightly less dumbass extraordinaire jj boiziau. he's going to feel right at home with thing1 and thing2. dumb and dumber. it also helps that bood and wyatt are damn good at what they do and shane already respects them so he doesn't have to get past the why the fuck are you so okay with losing attitude that a lot of the others have. i have no worries about shane being loved by the cens but i think he deserves two particularly close friends to fill the gap hayden and jj are leaving
tuna meltdown au where shane freaks out at the first name calling but instead of running away gets held by ilya so tightly that he canโt squirm out and shane is like let me go you asshole!! and ilya is like no ๐ก so they end up in this weirdly erotic slippery kerfuffle of wrestling and bitchslapping but ilya keeps squeezing shane so closely and violently that they end up just fucking about it on the couch
after his shower, shane joins ilya on the couch for movie night, hair still wet
ilya pulls shane into his side and turns his head to breathe in the smell of his freshly washed husband.
he inhales into shaneโs neck and shane giggles at the ticklish feeling. but something is differentโilya pulls away immediately
โyou smell weirdโ
โoh. mom got me some new shampoo and body washโ
โwhy does it smell like that?โ
โitโs cinnamon,โ shane says casually, then glances over at ilya curiously. โwhy, do you not like it?โ
ilya huffs in discontent and they watch their movie
โโ
the next morning, ilya awakens with shane draped over his chest. ilya leans in to plant a kiss on shaneโs head. he pulls back immediately with disgust.
ugh. cinnamon.
โโ
the next day, ilya is out at a restaurant with troy and harris. shane is meeting them after his personal training session.
shane walks in, and ilya stands up to give him a kiss, and immediately recoils with a wrinkled nose
โwhat?โ shane asks
โcinnamon.โ ilya death glares. shane just laughs and laughs at his husbandโs expression
โโ
this goes on for a weekโilya forgetting about the new shampoo and then complaining when he gets a wiff.
eventually, ilya takes to hiding the shampoo & soap so shane canโt use it. shane usually easily locates his hiding spots and finds ilyaโs one-sided feud with the bath products amusing
until finally, one day, ilya canโt take it anymore. heโs crawling into bed after shaneโs shower with tears in his eyes. โshane please i canโt take it anymore. i hate the cinnamon so much. itโs spicy and it burns my noseโ
shane takes pity on him and goes back to his seaweed shampoo, but keeps the cinnamon in case he ever wants to play a prank on ilya again.
yuna gets a text the next day from her son-in-law: โdo not ever. buy cinnamon shampoo again.โ yuna screenshots it and sends it to shane and they both crack up and never let ilya live it down

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If you enjoyed this book you should read every other book in the world for extra textual context. All things are intricately related to one another.