BUNK BED JUNCTION!

YET ANOTHER ROUNDUP OF ASOLUTELY UNHINGED COMEDIC RELIEF

ASSORTED SENTENCE STARTERS FROM AROUND THE INTERNET, including quotes from Tumblr, Pinterest, TikTok, and X (formerly known as Twitter), for when a muse wants to be a bit silly <333

CHANGE gendered words and in-universe phrases as needed.

SPECIFY muse for multimuses.

❛ I am not merely a clown; I’m the entire damn circus! ❜

❛ I will bite you if you continue this behavior. ❜

❛ Being a dramatic ass bitch isn’t a personality trait; it’s a lifestyle! ❜

❛ Trauma? Oh … you mean, my lore? ❜

❛ why must I cite sources? is it not enough to just say ‘trust me, bro’? ❜

❛ sorry for being a perfect sweetie and a genius it will likely happen again. ❜

❛ forget about touching grass; I need to touch WATER I NEED TO GO INTO THE OCEAN I NEED TO DIVE INTO THE SEA!!! ❜

❛ I’m attracted to men with muppet energy and no i will not be explaining. ❜

❛ you want me to make friends with people? the thing that killed julius caesar? ❜

❛ what’s your birthstone? mine is rock bottom. ❜

❛ I absolutely hate that I’m not bioluminescent. Pathetic. ❜

❛ ohhhhh my god i have got to stop mourning the past or whatever. ❜

❛ you expect me to act like a normal human being? I’m wearing a turtleneck! ❜

❛ i don’t struggle with same sex attraction I’m actually very good at it. ❜

❛ unfortunately i often find out without even getting the chance to fuck around. ❜

❛ I’m bisexual which means that I’m attracted to anybody who can defeat me in physical combat. ❜

❛ all anyone needs to know about me is that i’m a dumbass and i love women. ❜

❛ sorry but philosophers aren’t impressive i came up with stuff like that when i was 12. ❜

❛ I pay my own bills; I can cuss all I want! ❜

❛ I don’t have rizz; I have sad eyes and a weird presence. ❜

❛ my demons are chasing me and they’re doing the Naruto run. ❜

❛ honey we are ALL doomed by the narrative. it's not that serious. have some fun with it. ❜

❛ dating me is like interviewing a psych ward patient. ❜

❛ being a girl with very large brown eyes comes with great responsibility. ❜

❛ i’m autistic in ways that you can’t even begin to imagine. ❜

❛ being a loser may be a phase to you but its a lifestyle for me. ❜

❛ entering a magical portal in the woods would fix me. ❜

❛ I’m lonely but not in a hot mysterious way; more like in a pathetic way. ❜

❛ life is so unserious just say womp womp and move on! ❜

❛ you’re vibing? In this economy? ❜

❛ just because I’m small doesn’t mean I can’t kick your ass. ❜

❛ my primary motivators are fear, spite, and aesthetic longing. ❜

❛ sorry about the chaos; I needed attention. ❜

❛ WHAT IS UP GIRL you look foreboding and malicious! ❜

❛ baby i can be your problematic bi wife. ❜

❛ i don’t think any of you understand how important i am to the plot. ❜

❛ what if we are both red flags? what then? ❜

❛ any dream can be a prophetic dream if you’re willing to do some really weird shit. ❜

❛ my hobbies include being right, being gay, and being a hater. ❜

❛ i have a phd in Loving The Color Pink And Also Glitter. ❜

" is there anything about yourself that you haven't told me ? "

" will you come back to visit me ? "

" what could it mean ? "

" this is not the correct way , and you know it . "

" this is truly a room worth admiring . "

" your obsession borders on creepy . "

" this reflects poorly on your overall personality . "

" maybe this is why everyone left you . "

" are you just sitting around waiting for more dialogue ? "

" no one gets to tell me what to do . "

" everyone thinks you are very powerful . "

" there is nothing in the broom closet . no reason to still be here . "

" you're not even doing anything ! "

" please offer me some explanation here ; i'm genuinely confused . "

" the broom closet ending is my favourite . "

" you're fat and ugly and really , really stupid . "

" you're addicted to drugs and hookers ! "

" that kind of anxiety isn't healthy . "

" i'm not your enemy . really , i'm not . "

" i think perhaps we've gotten off on the wrong foot here . "

" how i wish to destroy you . how i wish to control you . "

" investing your trust in someone is difficult . "

" please , stop trying to make every decision by yourself . "

" this is it . your chance to redeem yourself . "

" i can't believe i've been so mistaken . "

" you and i don't even know each other . we're like strangers . "

" i still don't know you . and you don't know me . "

" you like being alone , don't you ? "

" perhaps you'll see me again , if you can find me . "

" i've escaped from that dull office and pesky narrator . "

" what are you talking about ?! "

" this is so stupid . why are we even doing this ? "

" you've demonstrated such bravery here today . "

" do you have zero consideration for others ?! "

" oh , thank god . you are willing to listen to me . "

" i think i feel ... happy . i actually feel happy . "

" no , wait ... where are you going ? "

" promise me you won't go back there . just - just stay here . "

" you are going to stay here , aren't you ? "

" please , don't take this from me ! "

" nothing good can come from this . "

" we can't be happy if we leave this place . "

" comedic timing is so difficult . i wish i was better at it . "

" it's just a bucket ! it can't think , it can't talk ! "

" i suppose you don't need me anymore . "

" you believe i'm real , don't you ? "

" give it to me ! give me the bucket , i need it ! "

" it's nice to see you again . "

" i'm on your side . we're in this together . "

" obviously the bucket isn't talking to you and telling you to do things . "

" do you see that i really have wanted you to be happy all this time ? "

" are you that convinced i want something bad to happen to you ? "

" that wasn't supposed to be a choice . how did you do that ? "

" can you see ? can you see how much we need one another ? "

" in the vast infiniteness of space , your thoughts and problems are materially insignificant . "

" when every path you can walk has been created for you long in advance , death becomes meaningless , making life the same . "

" although this passageway has the word ' escape ' written on it , the truth is at the end of this hall , you'll meet your violent death . "

reverse it, switch it up a bit, do whatever you want!

[ 01 ] sender discovers receiver trying to take care of their own wound very badly.

[ 02 ] sender discovers receiver trying to see something on their body with the aid of a hand mirror.

[ 03 ] sender discovers receiver attempting an ineffective 'home cure' for their illness.

[ 04 ] sender discovers receiver trying to style their hair but failing.

[ 05 ] sender discovers receiver precariously carrying way too much.

[ 06 ] sender discovers receiver doing home improvement incorrectly / dangerously.

[ 07 ] sender discovers receiver sitting outside after getting locked out.

[ 08 ] sender discovers receiver sitting on the ground trying to attract a street cat.

[ 09 ] sender discovers receiver looking at rings in a jewelry store.

[ 10 ] sender discovers receiver crying alone.

[ 11 ] sender discovers receiver dancing in their underwear.

[ 12 ] sender discovers receiver throwing something across the room.

[ 13 ] sender discovers receiver eating the sender's leftovers.

[ 14 ] sender discovers receiver writing / drawing in their journal.

[ 15 ] sender discovers receiver building a pillow fort.

[ 16 ] sender discovers receiver fast asleep in a weird spot.

[ 17 ] sender discovers receiver yelling at the television / a video game.

[ 18 ] sender discovers receiver terrified of a small bug.

[ 19 ] sender discovers receiver baking / cooking in a messy kitchen.

[ 20 ] sender discovers receiver trying to move something way too heavy.

[ 21 ] sender discovers receiver on the floor after they fell.

[ 22 ] sender discovers receiver drinking their fifth cup of coffee of the day.

[ 23 ] sender discovers receiver curled up on the bathroom floor after being sick.

[ 24 ] sender discovers receiver playing with fire, literally.

[ 25 ] sender discovers receiver snooping around where they shouldn't be.

[ 26 ] sender discovers receiver wrapping a present for sender.

[ 27 ] sender discovers receiver rearranging the room yet again.

[ 28 ] sender discovers receiver watching the latest episode without sender.

[ 29 ] sender discovers receiver with their head in the freezer trying to cool off.

THE  FOOL:  A  cobblestone  bridge  at  dawn.

THE  MAGICIAN:  A  bustling  street  market  under  twilight.

THE  HIGH  PRIESTESS:  A  midnight  masquerade.

THE  EMPRESS:  A  sprawling  garden  in  full  bloom.

THE  EMPEROR:  A  high-rise  office.

THE  HIEROPHANT:  A  grand  cathedral.

THE  LOVERS:  A  secluded  balcony  overlooking  a  bustling  city.

THE  CHARIOT:  A  speeding  train  cutting  through  a  desert

STRENGTH:  A  clearing  in  a  dense  forest

THE  HERMIT:  A  small  cabin  atop  a  snowy  mountain

WHEEL  OF  FORTUNE:  A  crowded  casino  with  spinning  wheels  and  flashing  lights

JUSTICE:  A  dimly  lit  courtroom

THE  HANGED  MAN:  A  deserted  pier  at  sunset

DEATH:  An  abandoned  train  station  at  dusk

TEMPERANCE:  A  quiet  book  shop

THE  DEVIL:  A  lavish  underground  nightclub

THE  TOWER:  A  crumbling  lighthouse  during  a  violent  storm

THE  STAR:  A  lake  under  a  blanket  of  stars

THE  MOON:  A  foggy  forest  path

THE  SUN:  A  sunflower  field  at  golden  hour

JUDGEMENT:  A  forgotten  battlefield  at  sunrise