💖💐🪴🌇🌈🪐

"tits or ass?" "I like personality" okay well I have a personality disorder, so you better learn to appreciate my tits and ass

vampires are obligate carnivores stop diet shaming them

although this does once again bring up my favorite philosophical talking point: is a blood-based diet vegetarian?

college professor just said “you’re probably too young to even remember this” and brought up something that happened in 2011

Better than my professer that said we’d “probably recognize this from Saturday morning cartoons” then showed us a cartoon from 1935…

New immortal vs. old immortal

normalize hand tattoos for people with boring, normal careers 2023

i plead oopsies dasies your honor

guy who installs an adblocker and forgets about it and lives in a beautiful world where online ads have become much less frequent

lalala world so beautiful advertisements so extinct (opens website on mobile)AAAAAH!!!!!!! OH GOD MY EYES!!!!!!!!!!!

everyone more pretentious than me is an insufferable poseur and everyone less pretentious than me is a clueless philistine

ⓘ this user is a dyke

we’re all boring to someone, annoying to someone, ugly to someone, but it’s not that deep

listen to me. listen. your actual job in life, and it sucks that your 5th grader teacher didnt explain this adequately enough, is to ask for help when you need it and to accept charity when it would take a weight from your shoulders. Otherwise you end up like Sisyphus- or even worse, Walter White

listen to me. listen. your actual job in life, and it sucks that your 5th grader teacher didnt explain this adequately enough, is to ask for help when you need it and to accept charity when it would take a weight from your shoulders. Otherwise you end up like Sisyphus- or even worse, Walter White

HEARTBREAKING: Poor girl has to get out of the soft warm bed even though she is so so so so comfy

HEARTWARMING: Since it is night, girl finally gets to crawl back underneath the covers and be so so so so comfy

HEARTWRENCHING: Morning has come again, poor girl suspects she might be stuck in a Sisyphean curse