DECOY

™from the future: this is my second draft. The first one turned out to be like a really shitty fanfic, which was NOT in my intentions, so I decided to make a new post from scratch. If you'll like these headcanons – I'll post that draft. It's basically the headcanons that I'm gonna list here, but in a story form I guess idk I will NOT reread that

™from the future's future: originally this was supposed to include Hemlock and Benny, but I got lazy lol

For this post you'll have to know the "Life before Dead as Disco" section from the Dex Headcanons post (it's at the very end), so if you haven't read that – go now.

Apartment at the edge of the world

Dex and Charlie had known one another since they were kids.

Once Charlie had reached the age of 16, Stix kicked him out of the bar, because "it's too costly to keep ya 'round", and, besides, the kid has to learn stuff on his own, too. I'm saying 16, because at The Encore we can see how Charlie's height has been documented when he was 5 and 11, so if we're assuming that he checked his height every six years, the next check would be when he'd turn 17.

Coming back to the "ever since childhood" thing; Dex would be the first one about whom Charlie would think when Stix would shut the door in front of his face, clearly stating that from now on he wants to see his face ONLY when it's his shift. Cruel, but necessary.

I'd say "for some reason, Dex lived in the middle of nowhere", but I won't, because I'm pretty sure that he ran away from his home and didn't have much money to let himself live in the city centre. Now add a nicotine and energy drink addiction, no stable job and poor mental health to that.

Eventually, Dex would only afford a sketchy apartment at the 15th floor of a suspiciously tall and unsafe looking building, with one bedroom that was also the kitchen, and a bathroom with no warm water.

Charlie wouldn't know in what conditions Dex was living in, since he wouldn't share something so "embarrassing" with Charlie, yet he'd know his address (Dex shared it with him when he moved two years ago) ((he did it by accident)).

Warning: depression, neglect, addiction, and self harm mention below

Now, let's talk about the aforementioned conditions a little more:

Very limited space. One bedroom that's also a kitchen, and a bathroom is NOT enough space for a grown man, even if he's 18. No balcony, barely any space in the extremely compact rooms and only one window is also pretty pressuring, especially when you live in a place like this on a daily basis.

No warm water. While for some warm water might seem something rather comfort bringing than a necessity, it is important in everyday life. No warm water means constant pressure and stress while showering, and also doing it as quickly as possible, which may lead to poor hygiene.

Barely any money. All that Dex could afford was to rent the place, buy cigarettes, energy drinks and sometimes a pack of instant noodles or two for a whole month. Yes, people can survive on such a diet, but not for too long.

And how these points would affect Dex's mental and physical health:

Neglect of his surroundings. Because of Dex's energy drink and nicotine addiction, his place soon would turn into a scrapyard of different cheap cigarette packs and energy drink cans. He'd try to clean it up at the beginning, but would quickly give up, as the trash is piling up faster than he can throw it away. After some time he'd barely leave the bed, because there'd be no space for him to put his cane.

Clean, but at what cost. Dex wouldn't let himself skip any shower if he felt like he needed one, but after some time showering would associate with constant tension for him, and that – with constant pain.

Surviving, but not living. Dex might be living separately from his family, but his life has turned into a survival game where he has to steal in order to make it to the next day. He gave up on legal testosterone, gave up on almost everything, just so he can be alone.

End of the content warning

No matter how much Dex would want to tell Charlie to fuck off, he wouldn't. Everybody loves Charlie, it includes him, too. He'd let him in, expecting Charlie to judge his ways of living and telling something like "yea yea you can keep the opinion to yourself" while closing the door (all Charlie did was cough because of the marinated cigarette stench).

I believe they'd fight a lot. A fucking lot, but only at the beginning. Dex is used to living alone, rotting in bed and practicing all in the same place all day long, but Charlie demands changes.

I'm going to be obnoxious here and say that since Charlie is a janitor he'd clean Dex's house. He is so used to everything being clean, that the state Dex's place in would drive him nuts only after being there for ten minutes.

The guy has a whole bunk bed and the lower bed isn't even usable because of the junk. The freezer can't open, and the stench is so bad Charlie almost passed out. Putting simply: horrible conditions.

I don't think Dex would mind the cleanup – he'd mind the fact that he couldn't do it himself; that Charlie was better and could do it. He wouldn't thank him or even mention it. Charlie wouldn't push.

After a month they'd settle down. No more fights alike "why do you even live here if you don't fucking like the place" or "I can manage shit by myself Charlie, I don't need you". Now it's more bickering than anything. Like roommates.

It'd take a long time, but I believe Charlie would help Dex finish his bed rotting streak. It'd be a small start with Dex actually getting down from the bed and smoking outside of the apartment, growing into Dex's habit of cooking them breakfast, because he is not letting Charlie cook. Ever. The guy can make some drinks, but not food.

Dex would be alike a house wife, except he'd be a house rascal more than a wife. Yes, he'd cook for them and even make something for Charlie to bring to The Encore (aw, Dex, you shouldn't have..) (okay I'm taking it back), but he'd also do everything to keep the aforementioned awake at the only hours he has for sleep.

Life together

Their first and last major (started by Charlie) argument would be because Dex kept practicing at night/early in the morning. Energy drinks and cigarettes do everything but help you sleep, not even gonna start with the side effects like anxiety.

Even though the music went straight to his ears via earphones, it was still loud, and the pulled strings were perfectly heard from Charlie's bed, as Dex would either be playing on his own bed or at the kitchen table.

Charlie would be patient, though. He'd keep asking Dex nicely to practice only in the daytime or, at least, when he's off for work, but he wouldn't get it the nice way. So after a month of enduring, he'd snap.

After that, Dex would stop. It'd be the guilt. Charlie is the only one who gets money from the two of them, and Dex can't even leave the house to get his bulked testosterone or food.