Talks in Haikus

Me, fighting a yoga mom in the organic food market circa 2023: take your hand off that peach or I’ll vaccinate your children against polio

fascinating post I made in 2018

my chemical romance is the funniest and weirdest band ever. They’re all fucking losers who would genuinely rather play dnd than hook up with groupies. The singer used to work at Cartoon Network. The bassist is on the fbi watchlist for crimes against disney. One guitarist is a guitar god but he also used to keep a little action figure of spiderman in his pocket all the time, the other is like a little lap dog of a man, but he’s also on the fbi watchlist for death threats against a us president. They refused to be on the twilight soundtrack, one of the most popular franchises at the time but then they preformed on yo gabba gabba and re-recorded one of their songs in simlish.

This blew up. I have more insanity. For all those asking it’s so important to me you know that mikey is on the fbi watchlist for bootlegging/pirating Disney movies to fuel his smashing pumpkins addiction. He’s now married to a Disney adult influencer. He also fucked pete wentz at least once and is the reason we have a decent chunk of fall out boys discography. They wrote and recorded their third album in the paramour mansion, which is super haunted and almost drove them all insane. The singer is he/they and has a Joan of arc complex, and they almost exclusively sing about themself through the lens of femininity. gerard was the inspiration for Edward Cullen and they got so upset about it they wrote a diss track to Stephanie Meyer and their record label. They also wrote the umbrella academy while on tour. Two of them used to do the most insanely homoerotic stuff together on stage while the others two just ignored it. They did a song with Liza Minnelli. They have a cursed song (drowning lessons) that they can’t play live because every time they do something bad happens. They have always always stood up for their mostly female and gay fanbase, even at the cost of their own reputation. They are lyrical and musical geniuses. Gerard didn’t shower for like a year once.

Last batch of weird. Ray has a degree in film. He’s been called the Brian may of his generation and when the band played with Brian may of the rock band of all time Queen, he said ray was a delight to play with. Ray also refuses to play in any band that isn’t mcr and the only time he played on stage when they were broken up was for some charity event the muppets held. Frank is mcrs number one fan and when they asked him to join the band he had to pretend to be too high to answer because he was so excited. His father is considered the best drummer on the east coast and was the last person to speak to John Lennon before he was assassinated. Mikey has been involved in every single one of Gerards projects in some shape or form. Gerards oc in the comic book universe that their fouth album ties into has a canon piss kink. Gerard created penny Parker from into the spiderverse. She’s very different in the comics. They have a cat named lotion. They also put an anthro version of lotion in doom patrol that one of the main characters fucks. All of these dudes have drunk piss.

Moral purity is impossible. Just do the best you can.

i’m sorry but there is no way you could have stopped me from standing on my chair and screeching like a banshee if i saw this live…

What

how

HOW

“ballet isn’t a sport”

The thing about this is, you can barely see their muscles straining from effort. The effort to keep each other and themselves balanced, definitely, but that guy’s hand is barely shaking. The amount of training and strength and balance to go into this is fucking insane.

Ballet is raw AF

Okay but someone make a pins or stickers with “our little white ass aren’t the only ones that matter” and I promise I’ll buy it