Lesbianism: The Blog: The Life

A note on Knighthood:

Knights were a specific, highly trained profession often (but not always) associated with landownership, either someone who was in the household of the landowner, or who was the landowner themself. The trappings of knighthood (weapons, armour, and horse) were quite expensive and belonging to a family of knights implies a specific degree of social status in and of itself.

While a sovereign can in theory bestow any title they want on anyone at any time, usually this requires that there be some service rendered for which this is a gift. (Fucking them, or just being hella attractive, counts.) Because of this, there is a wide variety of things “Knight” can mean, but here we will presume it means some degree of professionalism and attachment to a social status that is both someone who collects taxes from subjects and pays them to a sovereign in turn.

IIII

Skyward Sword =

There is no evidence of centralized government in Skyward Sword, therefore the taxes are going to whoever is in charge of the settlement. They were likely paid in kind (material goods), although Skyloft does have coin. Given we know who’s basically running Skyloft, we can guess they were paid to Gaepora, and at least one tax-funded organization: the Knight’s Academy.

Did students pay taxes? Graduates might be exempt from some taxes if still in service to the city. Afterwards, given he’s usually presumed to be married to Zelda, we can say Link is either paying taxes (or hearing about it personally at dinner), and/or helping collect and distribute taxes to others.

Or, even funnier, setting taxes on the new community because they need supplies to build it.

Minish Cap =

There is a central government in Minish Cap, because they have a monarch! This is probably a small territory: some “kings” have a few villages and fields and that’s it, but it is a castle which requires taxed goods to function because it’s not producing its own.

Link’s grandfather is a blacksmith, and also alive therefore if the census tax is paid per household, Link has nothing to do with it. If its paid per business, he’s an apprentice or employee so it’s still paid by his grandfather. Depending on which taxes were being paid when, they might pay coin or in kind (eg. Labour or goods produced.) While people absolutely did lie and cheat and not pay taxes, I expect the con artistry didn’t involve “refunds” in a modern sense, but that’s probably tax history specialization territory...

Four Swords =

This game doesn’t have enough of a framing story to comment on its social structures, but is superficially similar enough to Minish Cap we can assume the situation matches.

Ocarina of Time =

We literally see Talon paying his taxes in kind in the game. Like, you can’t pay milk as a lump sum so delivering it reliably to the castle could be counted towards his taxes, or he’s getting paid enough for it that will be paying for it later. Either way, supplies are delivered from Lon Lon Ranch by its owner who is still alive after the game and presumably will continue to be responsible for it until he is no longer owner of Lon Lon Ranch.

(Malon likely is a valid heir to Lon Lon Ranch. There is no reason to assume marriage affects her legal claim to Lon Lon Ranch. It is not common for a woman to lose her property in marriage – British law is the exception to historical norms – so even if Talon died she could still be sole and/or primary owner of Lon Lon Ranch, whether or not she is married.)

Link starts out the game not even on a Hyrulean census, with no property to his name, and no social connections. He is not paying taxes because he does not legally exist. Until he is counted on a poll as a resident of either Castletown or Lon Lon Ranch, and until he’s considered an adult (usually by means of acquiring personal property or skill of any value) he’s unlikely to be taxed.

Now, if we include into the assumed connections to the Hero’s Shade who died in elaborate plate mail we get a very different answer. Someone who owns elaborate plate mail of that sort has significant money. He may have received it as a gift for service to the crown, but if so it likely wasn’t the only gift. Plate mail is often associated with knights; a knight of some consequence is likely attached by some means or another to property. Knights under a King usually collected taxes for them... So, in a world where Link has platemail and is a valued knight of the Hylian Crown he may also, like Skyloft, be the person collecting taxes to pass them on. Whether or not that means he now technically owns Lon Lon Ranch by means of owning the land it’s on.... I leave that up to you.

Wind Waker =

Outset Island most likely operates like Skyloft: there is a headman or prominent family who collects surplus to give as aid, either in terms of money or food or services. Within that space, Link living with an invalid grandmother and also underage sister was probably one of those families receiving surplus as social support, possibly on top of whatever his grandmother was still capable of in her old age.

However, Link is implied post-game to leave with Tetra. What taxes did a ship and its crew owe? Harbour dues, customs, and other duties! This varied a lot and was usually addressed whenever someone docked at a controlled port. Often questions were asked about where the materials came from, more or less scrupulously. Sometimes people cared if you just happened to have something without a sound origin, that you had taken from someone else... like we see Tetra’s crew doing in-game...

It may indeed be possible Tetra (and her crew) are wanted for tax evasion and Link gets to be included in that, whatever his age.

Spirit Tracks =

This boy works for the centralized government’s transit system. If he doesn’t pay taxes, it’s because he doesn’t owe taxes because he’s working a tax-funded job and likely has been since he was an apprentice. He is possibly also union and knows the local tax law in extremely nuanced detail. He will judge you for not paying your taxes.

Twilight Princess =

The start of the story is also framed around the village blacksmith making some kind of tax-like offering to the royal family and setting Link up to take it. This is likely not a normal tax, but it does tell us that Ordon Village is considered a designated social unit within Hyrule and therefore we may assume that “Ordon Village” is a taxable entity in its own right. Link, as a resident of Ordon Village, would pay his portion of the village’s tax to the Mayor who arranged for its delivery. If Link marries Ilia, you can expect once again this is someone who either hears about taxes over dinner, or is helping collect them.

If Link leaves and moves to Castle Town, he’d have the joys of all the things large city residents pay for, up front or not, that village residents who are not transporting food and goods long distances but those will be sales and customs taxes, not per-person taxes based off the census or his vocation.

Four Swords Adventures [Game + Comic] =

Link’s family is explicitly positioned as either a knight family, or a legacy castle guard family with close personal ties to the royal family. He also has a living father, who is implied to survive the game/comic. As such, with Link a minor, he’s not paying taxes because he’s not liable for taxes. He also may be paying taxes by means of collecting taxed goods from the lands over which his family has ownership and paying a portion of that income to the Crown themselves.

Interesting, this could also tie into something I’ll mention in more detail below but one form of “evading taxes” can be “refusing to do labour.” If he is from a family whose young men are supposed to provide service to the Crown in the form of military labour, “leaving” is a crime.

Hyrule Warriors =

In this game, Link explicitly starts as a base soldier. It is possible for soldiers to be a form of population tax (and/or control) especially in larger kingdoms or empires. He likely did receive regular pay, but he might also have been considered legal property of the Kingdom, eg a slave. Either way, his upkeep was entirely from the taxes that went into the coffers, whether it was in food or kind. Post-game, he’s likely been involved in rebuilding which again would be in large part executed by taxed goods and labour. He might even be part of the apparatus collecting or setting taxes, especially if he becomes close with Zelda herself.

Link to the Past =

Link is explicitly stated to belong to a knight family, with an adult family member who is (arguably) alive at the end of the game. If he is paying taxes, he’s paying them from taxes paid to his family. Not paying your taxes as a knight family is infinitely more suspicious than not paying them as an individual, because then your monarch wonders what you’re using that money for. Is it rebellion? It better not be rebellion.

Link Between Worlds =

THIS Link is a Blacksmith apprentice. He does not have any known adult family. He may be assessed as part of the household he is apprenticed to; he might be assessed as independent depending on his age and where he is in his training and what the local tax law looks like. If there is a guild he may be assessed by means of his membership... but that may also be a separate tax from what he’s paying per the census. He could likely avoid it altogether, because he’s not exactly important at this age and social rank.

Ravio, on the other hand, is in some way involved with the Royal Family of Lorule (Hilda is personally betrayed he left.) However, Lorule is a failed state. There is no means by which they can collect taxes, nor distribute them... which is likelywhy Hilda has no control over her guards. (People aren’t very obedient when not getting paid.) Recovery to a state where taxation is reliable and people feel it’s worth doing will be a long road.

Zelda I & II =

Same as above: Hyrule is a failed state, at best in the process of recovery in Zelda II. People likely do not trust the tax collectors who do exist to pay their dues to the Crown vs keeping it for themselves. This is a matter of power rules. Link, a minor with no property, is likely of zero interest to anyone unless they sell children. In Zelda II, where he lives close enough to approach Impa with a question, he may be paying taxes if he has a vocation or he may be helping work in the castle, which brings us back to he’s collecting, distributing and/or paid by taxes.

BOTW & TOTK =

Hyrule here is NOT a failed state because they do not have a central government attempting to exert control. Here, things are more like Wind Waker or Skyward Sword: village mayors or prominent families control local taxation. There is limited intercommunity interactions, which are likely a matter of market tax. Link, if he settles in Hateno village, would be accountable to them.

In TOTK, we do see some kind of centralization: there’s the joint effort to construct Lookout Landing and the monster patrols, both of which would require outside support until local agriculture begins. Which communities contribute is hard to say, but most villages at this time are more than prosperous enough to spare the means. A new settlement would reduce overcrowding, increase the land available to farm, and so on: all good things for a prospering world.

(This does NOT imply they are re-establishing the monarchy. None of these groups call themselves “royal”. They’re monster patrols, not royal guards, and Lookout Landing, not a new Castletown. The location has access to already-quarried stone and trade routes going for it, after all.)

Given how Link behaves in both games, it seems likely he would contribute whatever surplus he acquires to these efforts. Out of every Link, I think he is the most likely to be cooperative with taxation... although there may be some arguments about what his taxable means is. Should this be paid in rupees or bokoblin guts? Let’s negotiate!

TL;DR =

Taxes vary wildly across time, space, regions, and forms of government. While some Links live in similar social circumstances, we have at least four really distinct categories: the Knights, the failed states, those with vocations, and the villagers. Similarly, many forms of taxes are for social support, things that Link tends to be characterized as valuing in the games. When people refuse to pay, they either do not see the request or authority as legitimate, or do not have the means to do so.

I don't know why Link would be in charge of Lon Lon Ranch. Unless you mean that fae marries Malon? It wasn't stated in your post so I was confused.

Anyway the major point here is that there is absolutely no way the Kokiri pay taxes. Not in a formal sense, anyway. They're fairies! They don't do this paperwork nonsense! They make Deals with the local mortals which is likely what is entered into the accountants' records instead. Goodwill is extremely important here, much like with the Zoras and their water rights. So for Kokiri I imagine a representative of the crown has negotiated a trade deal where they'll receive goods (grain and dairy goods, which cant be raised/grown in the woods easily, and they have a fondness for) in exchange for forest resources. Say, a woodcutter can collect x amount of wood in exchange for y gallons of milk from her cow, or a mycologist will bring bags of bran in exchange for a certain amount of mushroom collecting. The Kokiri can absolutely enforce their Deals: as we've seen, they can make mortals get lost, and eventually banefully transform into Stalfos.

Honestly OoT Hyrule is such a curiosity for me bc it seems to be a confederation between a central Hylia (for lack of a better word) and other Nations adjacent to it.

Now a very interesting tidbit: Ingo is preparing to pay taxes to Ganondorf. So Ganondorf is doing statecraft (and in the 3ds version, has a portrait of himself comissioned which ingo's miniature is a copy of) and collecting taxes. Furthermore, since Ingo knows that Epona is a "useless" horse whom no one can approach, he's basically committing tax fraud. Unless he can argue that Epona would just need to be broken in? Either way, the implications of this are important to the tax question.

That said, Ganondorf's rule has to be extremely unpopular and i imagine he'd have a lot of difficulty collecting taxes. I mean, with the recent freezing the Zora's Domain he's caused a huge drop in water levels, grossly so as seen in Lake Hylia. This kind of severe drought would impact crops and livestock all along the west and south side of Hyrule and beyond, devastating and starving thousands. Even his own people! I imagine he's very unpopular with the Gerudo since the water they depend on has dropped tremendously.

So yknow realistically Ganondorf would face a farmers rebellion even if Link didn't do something first. (i headcanon that the pre-game civil war was over border disputes and grazing rights)

Now, even more relevant to Link: the Skulltula House. Assuming fae breaks the whole curse, the wealthy family will give Link up to 500 rupees at a time, at any time. Now realistically there's a limit to wealth but the point remains that Link is being gifted a huge amount of money. That must be taxed, yes? In TP with the cursed rich man there would be a similar idea, i imagine...

Pity the tax collector who has to enter the Haunted House to collect taxes from the skulltula'd folks. Or, imagine Sheik watching Link get an absurd amount of money and privately has to pretend he doesnt see that bc he's not acting as Zelda right now and won't care about the unreported wealth.

Now for a goofier idea: Ganondorf seeking Link for Backtaxes. Can you imagine. In my thought, they're in court, Ganondorf representing himself (because of course) and Sheik representing Link.

Sheik would argue that Link was too young, of course! Ganondorf counters that since Kokiri are eternally children, their age of majority is much younger. That's when Sheik has to go to the Great Deku Sprout to get an affadavit that Link is a human and thus would be too young. (the other kokiris would repel any agents of ganondorf but also dont do Paperwork. what are you a cop)

Sheik could argue that Link wasn't in Hyrule, but sleeping in the Sacred Realm, and thus not occupying the country. But wouldn't Link be a citizen regardless? And the Kokiri don't pay taxes formally to begin with.

So yknow even if Link was found guilty of tax evasion, Link could pay in so many pounds of deku seeds and so much timber.