augh

New York: “the trees are losing their leaves, I’m losing my mind”

Florida: “fit to get hawk tuah from a bop”

+

California: “fit to go ponder where it all went wrong”

vs

meaning, you have a ~22 more chance of being bitten by a New Yorker than a shark.

also I found this funny

-Florida has a doorless jeep wrangler, neon orange or pink, I can’t decide

-not a hc but I love how massyork is finally getting more recognition. You can’t just say “nobody can kill you but me” and brush it off as normal saying

-Mass yells at children in airports and train stations and makes them cry. It isn’t his fault they aren’t moving 🙄.

-Maryland curses. A lot. Virginia has to put him in the corner but he always escapes.

-I think New York’s hair grows really fast so like one week he has a buzz cut and then like two weeks later he has a mullet.

-I like the idea of the states being famous and having social media platforms. I feel they would post the stupidest things ever of each other. (They all have gov blocked too)

-wyoming’s only weakness is swimming.

-the national guard has been called on each northeast state on more than one occasion.

-all you hear in Times Square is “Welcome To New York”, “Empire State of Mind” or, “New York, New York” (TS, Jay-Z +Alicia Keys, and Frank Sinatra) If NY can hear car honks and yelling and stuff, I fear he would hear these songs ON REPEAT. (poor guy)

^imagine like crying and just constantly hearing: “In new yooorkk, concrete jungle where dreams are made of!! There’s nothing you can’t dooo!”