Two Stars

Looking for true love looking for true love

None of them are gonna be physically violent

The Reddit users are going to judge you if you express any religious or “unscientific” sentiment

The Catholics run the gamut from “hardcore pro-lifer” to “Nun who invented communism”

The Protestants have brought lots of food but are going to proselytize the entire time you eat

The crystalists are split 60/40 on whether or not vaccines cause autism, and you don’t know who has the majority until you’ve been there an hour

The Anglophiles have good pastries, but 1/3 of them are in Sherlock cosplay

The girlbosses are all within 10° to the left of the center of the political spectrum and will try very hard to get you to invest in their MLM

The vegans brought food but will turn hostile if you let slip that you’ve used animal products in the last year

The reenactors have booze, but your phone is dead and they’re giving a very pro-America history lecture

The influencers have a pool, a jacuzzi, and lots of drugs, but they have a combined net worth that teaches seven digits and won’t let you forget it