these boys aren't normal about each other

No ship hate! <3

Both of them grew up in abusive households and developed similar ways of coping with that. Rose assumes the worst of everyone and treats social interactions like mental games of wits and dominance. Dave overshares and goes on lengthy tangents because he's desperate for human interaction yet still acts like he's too cool for it because genuine affection is so not cool, right?

And somehow they just work together? They easily have the closest bond out of all the kids. Rose easily pokes holes in Dave's "ironic" image and presses him with questions to pick his mind and make him squirm. Dave sees through Rose's highfalutin act and calls her a fake to her face, something I doubt she'd tolerate from anyone else but him. They can let their masks drop just a bit around each other because they trust each other that much.

They both act distant and aloof, but they care too much for the others in their lives. That's why they sacrificed themselves twice over to save their friends. Even in an alternate timeline, they died together fighting for what was right. And then they were reborn together as gods. If that isn't love then I don't know what is.

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I would like to, at some point, explore the idea of what the hell Ford would do if Stan was out of commission when he got back.

Not dead, to be clear. Just. Unconscious. Sick or something. Maybe he hit his head during the Portal's activation and is out for the count.

Because I think without Stan mediating, Ford would have VERY LITTLE idea what the hell is going on.

Ford gets back to his home dimension, and there are two children (twins, he can tell right off the bat. Chubby cheeked and they look familiar, painfully like the twins in the picture Ford carries in his pocket) and another man that looks like a large hairless gopher. The twins are Mabel and Dipper, and the man is Soos.

All together they drive off the federal agents that were apparently after his brother, for some reason And manage to settle the sick/injured/otherwise unconscious Stan up in the Shack, sleeping peacefully.

Uh. Now what.

At some point during all this another girl shows up brandishing an axe at Ford and being threatening despite the fact she can't be more than fifteen.

Ford does a head count.

Himself, (traveled in the multiverse for 30 years and has no concept of contect for this world, arguably the most responsible. Cannot cook)

Mabel and Dipper (twelve, staying over in Gravity Falls for the summer at their parents wishes, full of questions, cannot cook.)

Soos (Twenty One and very nice, unknown relation but knows the answer every question regarding the Shack or Stans medical care, including medication he has to take which no one else knew about. Can cook)

And Wendy (fifteen, suspicious and protective, unknown relation. Second in terms of knowing things about Stan. Can cook a little)

And Ford takes all of this information, mulls it over, does the math, thinks it through and decides "Ah. Stan has had children since I've been gone. Checks out."

(He probably gains the nerve to ask Wendy where her mother is, thinking Stan's...wife? Is probably out of town or something, but Wendy shoots him a mean look and says "she's dead, actually." And Ford panics so hard about the social blunder he never asks another question)

So for. However long it takes Stan to wake up, Ford is operating on the idea that, in the three decades he's been gone, Stan has built a family (tragic, about his wife. When he asks Mabel though she mentions a divorce, so maybe its not so tragic-?) And a business (which all the kids (soos included) demand stays running even while Stan is recovering because Stan would hate to see it closed) and a happy life.

So, Ford decides he must be a Good Uncle, and steps up. He's proud of Stan, even if his twin did technically steal his identity. He's still mad, a little, but Ford's heart is very quickly melted by Stan's kids.

And they ARE Stan's kids. Ford can absolutely tell.

Mabel and Dipper, despite being a neice and nephew, remind Ford of Stan a lot. The adventures, their personalities, their...inclination towards committing crime with very little hesitation

Seriously Stan, what are you teaching your children?

Soos is, of course, Soos, who is very concerned about Stan's safety and also the rest of the kids, and he takes to his temporary job as head of the Mystery Shack like a duck to water. He reminds Ford of a younger Stanley, eager to please and strong willed, determined to get things done.

Wendy is a wild card in that Ford doesn’t know exactly how best to connect with her, but Soos assures him thats just how Wendy is. Wendy has all the snark and the spark that Stan had in their youth, and Ford sees that right off the bat (its funny because she swings a bat at him at least once)

All in all, by the time Stan is awake again and back in the game, Ford is undeniably smitten with this ragtag bunch of kids Stan has. He's proud of how Stan raised them, proud of Stan for being the father they didn't get.

Consider.

Soos would obviously tell Abuelita that he needs to stay at the Shack for a while (to support Stans..er. predicament.) And Abuelita would absolutely go "I am coming too."

So one day Ford comes into the living room and there is a GRANDMOTHER there who literally just introduces herself as "Abuelita" with no further context so Ford's just like "ah. Stan's wife's mother, obviously."

And again, he never voices this thought OUTLOUD or if he does he does so VERY vaguely, so no one ever corrects him. Also, everyone refers to Abuelita as Abuelita and they all know her, so, it fits.

(Abuelita knows. She knows damn well what Ford thinks, and she's not gonna correct him. In fact, she is going to say things that are JUST on the edge enough that solidify Ford's belief, like "ah yes, Stan put a toolbox in Soos's hand early" or "and all of Stan's kids, you know-" in order to really sell it while still having plausible deniability)

And mind you, Ford asked ONE question and got "my mom's dead actually." He does NOT want to push for more information (even if he is SO SO CURIOUS about Stan's life. He wants stories. Recounts of the past 30 years he's missed. He wants baby pictures dammit.) And hes JUST AWKWARD enough as it is that NONE OF THE KIDS notice this misconception.

Ford is so much Like That that no one suspects (except Abuelita) that he is opportunity on a base of completely incorrect information.

This is probably a good thing, because Mabel would absolutely realize she has the opportunity to just straight up lie, and I feel like she takes after Stan in more than one way and would use said opportunity for evil.

(That being said, I do think Dipper would too. He would tell Ford "United States? No, we're the western most part of the Soviet union." If he had a chance)

(That's to say nothing of Wendy. Wendy would tell Ford that Stan grew them all in a lab from test tubes he stole from the alien crash site)

Here's the thing. The kids, Dipper and Mabel and Wendy and Soos, would all have a healthy suspicion of Ford.

Stan isn't there to smooth things over, he isn't there to tell the story of his life and explain that Ford is his twin. Which means the kids are operating based only on Ford's WORD, and sure, Ford literally looks just like Stan but they've fought a shapeshifter before! Dipper's been tricked about the author of the journals before, and this time Stan is in some backroom injured and the kids take some responsibility about watching this Weird Guy who may or may not be their great uncle.

Which means the kids are suspicious, they act sort of weird, and the don't answer questions. Ford doesn't want to push because again, the time he did landed him in a DEEPLY uncomfortable situation and hes not gonna do that again, but also because it's clear these kids are wary of him. They don't trust him, and worse, they don't trust him around Stanley.

And then. Ford starts to think of maybe what Stan told his kids about him. What stories, what memories, what laughs, what..

Arguments. They might have had.

So now Ford, operating under the belief that perhaps. Stan told these kids EVERYTHING, looks at these kids defending Stan's every choice fiercely in a new light. Ford comments on the ridiculousness of a taxidermy specimen and Dipper snaps about the work stan put into it. Ford rolls his eyes at the tacky gift shop and Wendy looks murderous. A complaint about Stan's redecorating, or the state of the shack and Mabel and Soos both "gently" remind that Stan was doing his best, and his best was pretty good.

All of Stan's kids acknowledge the flaws. They talk about them and even snark amongst themselves "of course Stan would do that-" but they are still ready to pounce if Ford laughs a bit too much at those jokes, if he mutters too loud negative words.

Every time i post on here it feels like I'm masking even though Code is generally right there nodding along, but like? What am I supposed to do? Get my own blog? We have too many already! And we already have two other guys with sideblogs who interact with the fandom I would post the most about (DSMP) so?? Do I just steal Favors!Wilbur's blog? Especially since I feel like I'm being trained as a primary host the way Sharky ( @can-i-be-redeemed ) was, except he was a crisis host and I think I'm just here to let Code be less frontstuck? So probably I should have my own blog? Probably it would help to have a space that's mine? Fuck, this is all such complicated bullshit. Can I have simple problems for once in my existence?

-Wil aka Gothbur