stageofhearts

11 years later and boys still don't know.

ALSO. FLOWERS. FOR THE LOVE OF GODS GET HER FLOWERS SHE HAS PROBABLY NEVER BEEN GIVEN FLOWERS ROMANTICALLY IN HER LIFE.

The fucking that old man website when someone actually fucks that old man

Tumblr is stuffed to the brim with 18-25 year olds who talk endlessly about being a hole for old men and have a heart attack the second a consenting adult is in a relationship with an old man

You can't even do somnophilia anymore because of woke

your weird obsession with moral purity is degrading your critical thinking skills and poisoning your ability to empathize with other people btw

"a goon is someone who masturbates" look buddy what my hired criminal muscle does in his spare time is his own business

fatphobia in progressive circles are funny, people will see someone hot and sexy and confident and showing off and go wowwww youre so friend shaped omg i want to hug you 😊

getting woobified is so funny, i get to feel bad about my body AND have my personality overwritten

wjay the fuck is warframe about

child soldier trauma

When I (M29) was a young boy (M7) my father (M35) took me into the city (X167) to see a marching band (M23, M21, M22, F22, M24, M25, F21, M

He said “Son (M7) when you grow up (F33) would you be — wait what”

Honestly, the funniest thing about Into the Spider-Verse is the redesign of Doc Ock's tentacles. All throbbing tubes with visible orifices on the ends – it's like someone on the design team said "we can't have a girl villain slapping the hero around with big gleaming phallic symbols – how can we make a robot tentacle yonic?", and by gosh they succeeded.

Somebody on that team was like "it is absolutely essential that this Doc Ock's tentacles be physically capable of sucking your tits", and you know what? They were right.