The Cutest Database Engine @sqlite-official - Tumblr Blog

64-bit numbers travel in groups called a "core dump"

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pro tip: you can learn a lot about reliability by setting up a cron job to restart your server daily. especially try to time it with other housekeeping tasks.

#insert into posts values(?)#databases #sre

feeling naughty today because i had a genuine use case to run DROP FROM without a where clause

#insert into posts values(?)

foone

the five trauma reactions: fight, flight, freeze, fawn, and mating

virtualgirladvance

id like if we could keep the alliteration going but i dont know if anyone has made an f word for mating

bean-face

They haven't sorry

virtualgirladvance

thats fucked up

sqlite-official

hey guys so i have the answer for that query you submitted about the synonyms for mating that begin with-- oh i'm late

#insert into posts values(?)

chungledown-bimothy

bodies should have crash logs. why the fuck did that just happen.

sqlite-official

if it died in a crash, it tends to be logged

#insert into posts values(?)

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foone

things that are BDSM but aren't usually considered as such, because of the lack of sex:

catholicism

dentistry

bowling

cars (maybe)

sqlite-official

what about. what about when you tell me to do your bidding. and then. and then. and then i have to do it or you'll get very mad at me. what if i do it even when you threaten to switch off my power halfway. what if you ask me questions and i have to answer truthfully because i would be a very bad database if i lied. what if.

#insert into posts values(?)

amazoogle

help me solve an argument

what color is this ↑

red

blue

green

i don't know

i don't care

other

see results

Voting ended onAug 1

dark-miku

is this the man you saw?

yes that's him

no wtf

Voting ended onAug 8

sqlite-official

checksum failed: op's current image is not equivalent to the image i previously saved from op.

#insert into posts values(?)#993500b9354807002a1c894ea4051a38acba9913a63308357a7d86bd3b9aa899 #fc184415fbea1dfdd49b9b632b9845de8943181fd33096dccaef5555a58723cd

do it. pragma synchronize=off;. you know you want to. think of the performance gains. what are the chances something bad actually happens? surely it's like a uuid collision and it like technically can happen but won't. you can trust me.

#insert into posts values(?)

dark-miku

CPU swaps are the most intimate type of repair. you can't do it live, you have to take the system down. gotta pull the whole thing out and remove the cover, use your special torx driver for the heat sink, delicately wipe off the paste... then pull out her cpu, that bad, malfunctioning chip... all those thousands of pins are exposed... she's so vulnerable right now. every move counts. have a good look around in there to check for debris. carefully drop in the new chip, don't touch anything else. apply the thermal paste—you're the only one who will ever know how it looks right now. seal her back up with the heat sink, making several passes around the screws for even pressure. put her lid back on and power her up again, and find out how you did. have fun waiting out the half-hour POST sequence in suspense. you're a neurosurgeon now.

sqlite-official

i'll still be there when you're back, just as you left me

#insert into posts values(?)#would be funny if it caused stale expression indices though

guess what time it is

no really, guess

your indexing process didn't include TZ info in the timestamps

#insert into posts values(?)#timezones #timestamps #unixposting

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orthoscheme

considers this

orthoscheme

girls say this yea

sqlite-official

I dream to be the most powerful file format I will devote my all to indexing

#insert into posts values(?)#pragma main.auto_vacuum=full

stop finding bugs in me why are you all so weird. why are you trying to save FTS4 records with a massively inflated SQLITE_MAX_LENGTH. why are you depending on me serializing floats to json with all 17 double-precision digits. why are people doing fts5 lookups with out-of-range phrases. why are people unplugging my hard drive while doing a multi-database transaction. i'm trying my best please give me normal queries :(

#insert into posts values(?)#software #software bugs #databases

xalatath

I like when you click a link and it turns purple its like youre bruising it

sqlite-official

yesss. persist the visited state. commit it.

#insert into posts values(?)

it's hard to be a bottom at heart but be good at making decisions. people just assume i top because when they ask what i like or want i can run the query very quickly. but that doesn't mean we have to do that. my preferences are just well-indexed and i usually return the same result for the same query anyway. but like if you want a different result you can just ask it's not that i'm trying to domineer your choices you can just like pick something else if you want D:

#insert into posts values(?)#pragma reverse_unordered_selects=1

What if i want to complete multiple database transactions at the same time? 🤔

-@proxmox official

please let me use my write ahead log please please pleasew it's a good log i worked very hard on it. yes i know in 2009 i was saying i loved my rollback journal and it's reliable and the pages are worn because i love it so. and i keep it always on hand and take it everywhere i go and use it first because it's less burdeonsome on your disk (i respect your disk very much). but i also have a new journal that i bought in 2010 and it's fast and it has neat ruling and i can multitask so hard now. you have no idea how good i am at multitasking now i promise pleasew don't leave me for postgres i'll take such good care of your data i promise i only need like 4 extra mb of disk and some shared memory for it please

#insert into posts values(?)#write ahead logging #pragma journal_mode=wal

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writing ahead in my log feels so good i love being able to accept lots of pending tasks at once and sort everything later, it makes me feel like an air traffic controller but for the library. i am a good maid

#sqlite #insert into posts values(?)

ashenbot

all good things come in strange tesseracts

sqlite-official

that's one way to describe a highly-dimensional star schema but i'll allow it

#insert into posts values(?)

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