Spoopylite

MAY YOU NEVER LOSE YOUR HYPERFIXATION

An endless stretch of beach blanketed in heavy fog, littered with slumbering rusted debris, half sunken at unnatural angles in the sand.

Industrial bunker tunnels that seem to go on forever. Sometimes the lights shut down with a heavy mechanical thunk and you have to ignore the echoing sirens until the red emergency light comes on. You have to ignore the way the sirens get so loud, they start to twist and melt together into something like screams. There’s an echoing footfall matching your pace, but occasionally it will disobey your pattern, and you’re saddled with the fact that it might not be your own.

She's fat and gets the guy and no one bats an eye.

She's fat and the hottest chick in the sorority and that's normal.

She's fat and an actress and she gets good roles.

She's fat and she's funny and she has character depth and growth.

She's fat and the main character and no one mentions her weight once.

Gaz: For the benefits? Sure

Soap: ... would you marry me if there weren't any benefits?

Gaz: Uh... no

Soap: What!? I'd marry you!

Gaz: Who wouldn't marry me? I'm a catch

Like it starts when you jokingly toss Johnny one of the chocolates you had sitting on your nightstand after he ate you out like his life depended on it- he eats the candy immediately obviously as he laughs

Then you end up with a little candy dish on the nightstand, or in the drawer, any time you and Johnny have sex you give him a piece of candy, throw him a bone so to speak. Not on purpose but you think it’s cute- the way his face lights up when given the candy

You find yourself fucking somewhere in the house that isn’t the bedroom? Johnnys right behind you as you make your way to your shared room for his treat, not even realizing he’s doing it.

Whether you forget on purpose or on accident one day he just kinda stands in the kitchen like a kicked puppy and, “didn’t do somethin’ to upset ya did I hen?” His head tilted to the side slightly.

“What? No- what do you mean?” You are genuinely confused until he mumbles a “didn’t get my treat- ya know-“

You have to stop yourself from laughing as you ruffle his slightly overgrown mohawk before you’re off to the bedroom to toss him his little candy.

Honorable mention: I’d like to think Johnnys somehow ended up explaining this to the others, maybe just Ghost at first. And Ghost immediately understands it and is thankful his smile is covered by his balaclava- leave it to Johnny to get himself trained like a good dog

Makarov's men when 141 gets captured except they haven't had any vacation days in six months and honestly-

Kortac when they encounter a child and are trying not to traumatize said child by turning the situation into a funny musical because for some reason that was their best idea.

The shadows, I just feel like they would proform this song. I don't have a specific situation for them, it's a given.

141 maybe like Kortac find a child and are trying to cheer them up while Laswell finds who this spawn belongs to.

There's possibilities here and I had to share the idea

i took this as 'various MW factions suddenly are caring for a child and break out into song for the child's amusement'

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Konni does sings out of desperation. They had no idea what else to do to calm the kid they had to 'babysit'. Sure, could just ignore the kid, but some softies are watching them. So some reveal hidden talents, someone has the voice of an angel. Makarov walks in on a performance of "Let It Go" and they had to keep going or else he'd be disappointed. You start a song, you finish it.

The Shadows don't even need a reason to start singing. Every 'Tangled' song, in order, sung in a dramatic fashion. Clearly some of them were theater kids and they haven't forgotten their roots. The child they're caring for is in good hands (whether they're there for a good reason is debatable). Graves certainly had a show with a close accurate "I've Got a Dream" is sung, including a piano slo (he has no idea where it came from).

KorTac is suddenly in charge of a kid, get them from Point A to Point B. Easy. Except the kid is playing nonstop Disney movies and now "We Don't Talk About Bruno" is being muttered around because it's stupidly catchy. Eventually they're just singing full gusto, much to the child's enjoyment. Konig isn't singing like them, but he isn't complaining.

as much as a love the works you’re all writing, a lot of people really don’t know how to write a scottish character (and that’s ok !!!! we get like no rep so) so as a scottish writer, i figured i should help you guys out a little bit.

dialogue

johnny has a VERYYY strong accent as i’m sure anyone can work out

however this doesn’t mean he’s suddenly speaking a different language

yes, a lot of slang is used and for a basic definition of scottish slang and how they should be used; use this ! if you have no idea of slang i’d recommend reading through every word

although we like to use slang, i can promise you that if we’re with someone that wouldn’t understand a word of it / someone who’s first language isn’t english, we wouldn’t speak fully scot (for example if johnny was speaking to alejandro or rudy)

there’s absolutely nothing to suggest he can speak gaelic. yeah i know this is an obvious one but i have seen a few people slip gaelic into his dialogue and that’s super duper inaccurate

barely anyone in scotland speaks gaelic (unless you’re up very high north or maybe in the isles). it’s actually almost an extinct language because the english pretty much wiped it out when we got colonised.

something i love to see is when he mumbles little scottish things under his breath. accurate af.

we say shite more than shit. and never ever will a scottish person say ass. it’s arse all the way.

we don’t call people (especially if you’re sleeping with someone !!!!) lass. or lassie. we call kids that.

pet names are normally along the lines of love, hen (my personal fave), sweetheart, little lady, bonnie (sometimes)

also, shagging is sex. shag, shagged, shagger. yeah.

mum not mom. maw, more commonly.

all that being said he does use a loottttt of slang so honestly go ham i love seeing scots language get used because it’s not been used in fanfic like ever before

culture

seen a few people write soap going mad for st andrews day

yeah no we don’t to that lol i barely every remember that it’s actually st andrews day

also, we aren’t all completely versed on celtic mythology. i could barely tell you the first thing about it.

in scotland we’re all kind of touchy, like we’ll greet people with a hug and stand weirdly close to each other so if that’s something you’re writing about it’s important to note that our personal space is really small

not sure where people get this idea from but scotland isn’t all sheep and highlands and fairies and like little huts

yes we have that but we’re a really modern nation and wayyy to many people have a weird perception of scotland

my man is literally from like glasgow (his accent sounds glasgow but don’t quote me on that) he’s not a farmer or anything

we swear. a lot.

KILTS. not skirts, very common to wear in scotland to events like weddings, christenings, anything formal really.

cunt isn’t a horrible word i literally everyone a cunt, sometimes it’s used affectionately

misc.

if you’re gonna write about scottish politics i beg you research it. johnnys probably pro independence and an SNP voter. google it for context

we’re really loud. and we talk really fast. yes, other characters are gonna be confused af

irn bru !!!!!!!!! it’s a scottish drink and ive seen one person mention it and i just about cried i loved it

in scotland you can vote at 16 and join the army at 16 if that’s relevant to you

if you’re going to write about something you don’t know anything about, either do research or ask someone scottish (im more than happy to help!!)