Queen Keeyva

like sure they're not having sit down formal discussions about limits and safewords. shane would rather die than admit he has wants and needs; ilya makes everything into a joke or a game ("let's make a deal") to lessen the threat of rejection. but they've spent their entire adult lives studying each other's physicality on the ice ("you're an awesome player to watch"), competing against each other, having sex together, paying close attention, cataloguing physical tells, weaknesses, erogenous zones, preferences ("ginger ale cold enough?" + "i bought you cokes"). they've unintentionally become the world's leading experts in each other's bodies. "i think i know how the staff likes to be treated after all these years" ....yeah, yeah they do. how am i supposed to ever be Normal About Them

sorry still on this one. can’t get over whatever higher up who picked cap/alt being like haha this is gonna be greatttttt drama press for us let’s see if we can get a fight even. and then they turn up and get drinks together and start playing around in the pool and giggling on the ice. let’s imagine in our beautiful minds the intermission and postgame interviews I’ll start. “Shane it seems like you and ilya Rozanov are getting closer playing together was there any friction when you were named captain and ilya alternate” (Shane who just got dizzy hearing the word ilya and friction in the same sentence) uhhh it’s a good game good hit pucks and you know we got them into the net so that’s game good I mean good game. and then the reporter says Shane I have to say it looked like you and ilya were even enjoying playing on the same line and Shane (abruptly close to tears) says um excuse me thanks guys and goes to hide in the bathroom for five minutes. Were also not even getting into the fact that they were in the SAME LOCKER ROOM. From the bottom of my heart how was nobody clocking this

Ilya is like oh I'm so freaky and in control of the situation and Hollander will do as I say. Then Shane flings his panties in Ilya's face goes knuckles deep in his ass gives Ilya irreversible brain damage with "You. I need you." And crawls on hands and knees to nuzzle his face on Ilya's dick and ends up clothes off face down ass up getting railed into another dimension. In control my ass your control got washed down the drain in that bathroom the moment you went in to check Shane's ass and he got hard in 0.2 seconds because of it.

We always talk about Shane's oral fixation but let's talk about Ilya's. This man is ready to put anything in his mouth. He eats ass pussy dick fingers tits and anything offered in front of him. He had his hoodie's drawstrings in his mouth while watching Shane on the ice live for the first time. He had his crucifix in his mouth while sexting Shane. My boy puts the 'eat' in 'heated' and I will not let it be underappreciated in this house.

and if i said this made my stomach hurt watching for 2 hours straight

SMUG OMGGGGGGGGGG