So This Is Love

A couple weeks ago I realized something. I realized that I’m in love with my boyfriend. We’ve only known each other a couple months so it was a surprise to me. I had been trying to hold back and reel in my emotions cuz I tend to become infatuated quickly. But this is far different from anything I’ve ever felt. It’s deeper, not superficial like when I’ve liked guys in the past. Even when I realized how much I liked him it felt different.

I know some people think that two months of knowing someone is too quick to know you love them. But I say time does not determine closeness. Even with my closest friendships I knew very quickly, usually the day I met them, that they’d be part of my life forever. I’ve slowly started being able to see a very long future with my boyfriend. I can see him being my forever love.

It’s funny, people always say that when you love someone you just know. I always wanted a better answer, I wanted to be able have an exact way of when I’d know it’s love. Well I understand that sentiment now. It hit me out of the blue, but I knew it was the truth. Love really surprises you.

But now the reason I’m here saying this rather than telling him. I don’t want to be the one to say those three words first. Everyone tells me that he should say it first. Plus I’m a little nervous that he’ll think it’s too sin to be saying that, even though I can tell his feelings are very strong for me as well. I absolutely hate keeping secrets from him cuz total honesty is a big deal to both of us. So not telling him is torture.

I keep nearly slipping up and saying it every single day. It just feels so natural and right to say it, which makes it even harder not telling him. Every night we talk on the phone before bed so that our voices are the last thing we each hear before falling asleep. It’s difficult not ending the call with “Love ya”. Each time I know our call is ended I do say “I love you” out loud. I’ll pull up my favorite picture of us, in which he happens to actually look like he’s looking out of the picture directly at me, and I’ll say it to the picture randomly during the day.

So to appease my need to say it I share it here with all you lovers of love. I love you dearest! You’re the best thing that has happened to me! I can see forever with you and I can’t wait to see what the future holds for us.