My name is Sorio. That's what I told the Police.

Guess who ✨couldn’t fucking sleep last night✨? Maybe it’s just because my sleep schedule has been so tremendously fucked recently, but I just, like, could not fall asleep, to the point I eventually just gave up trying. I am, so fucking nervous about it this time, I’m not sure I can even explain it. When Chapters 3 and 4 launched, I was excited, eager to play the new chapters. Now, I’m almost nauseous. I guess that’s just how impactful Chapter 4 really was. 

15 minutes before launch, You-Know-Who started posting on Social Media once again, roughly every five minutes. With capitalization and punctuation possibly misleading, “The resonance has quickened. Will we be meeting each other like this more often? In that case perhaps we need no preface. The fifth field.” Delightfully ominous as ever, thanks Doc. 

Unlike last time, where the game released a little bit early, today I had difficulties getting the update. I’d more blame Steam for that than anything, though. 

Alright, enough stalling. Let’s do this. 

Nice whistle. Weird singing for the title drop, though. 

Oh, Kris did sneak out the window. And we’re still in the cage? 

I think my theory about Kris running out of energy without the Soul was just proven right. Holy shit, they looked rough. 

Okay, questioning my priority with Azzy’s drawer. That’s fair. 

So, Sans restocked the fridge, but stole the ketchup? Fitting for him. 

Oh, Toriel…

I hope Kris is gonna be okay…eventually at least. 

Do I tell the truth, or…you know what, yeah. I will, if just in hopes she’ll apologize. 

Sans, you rat bastard. 

Odd that the shadows of the action figures are back. 

Early morning, huh? Sorry, kiddo. 

Oh, uh, hey Asgore! Blocking the street, huh? 

This conversation with Asgore is certainly, interesting. Especially with him rejoining the force, I guess?

Mayor’s discount? That sounds…not great for Asgore. 

Pants, what are you wearing?

Only place left to go is the School. Gee, wonder where Susie might be?

Oh, Temmie. 

Jockington as King and Queen? Go off, I guess. 

Welp, into the Dark World we go. 

Oh, hey Ralsei! Alone on a Sunday morning?

‘Sup, Lancer? Like your party stuff. 

Hey, new goofy Ralsei face! Yay!

Also, so she knows it’s a date then! Cool!

Huh. Church in Castle Town now. Interesting. 

Did I just see a Rudinn break up?

Oh, there are a LOT more fusion opportunities now. 

…you know, I don’t think I would take the DogWidow even if I HAD the GoldWidow. Or a DogDollar for that matter! I will take the PunchBowl though, if only because team heal items are limited. 

So, Kris is Quiet, yet flirtatious as the Blue Rose, and Ralsei Goes well with tea as Artemisia. Also, he has “ReviveSong” now. 

Hey Seam, check it out. Four of them now. What are these things?

Hey, I was right about them being Lost Dreams!

The fucking Mannequin? What? I mean, I do have it, but like…what?

I…should’ve bought the bow tie thing from Spamton, shouldn’t I?

Horse racing outside the castle?

Yo, What?

Oooh, design an outfit with Chef Lancer! This is interesting. 

I…kinda just want Susie to be Susie? Or at least make her own decisions? But if I have to make something newer, let’s make her feel Lively…no, Cool, no! Spice, no! Lively. 

Alright, I just chose option 1 in each category, and it was super Lively, without being Elegant or Gun’s. Fair enough. 

She’s gonna hate it, isn’t she?

Yep. She does. 

Well, she’s wearing it anyway! And she looks…annoyed. But she’ll keep on the hat for now. 

Oooh, free Lancer Cookie!

The whole crew is together again! Susie is a Violent Violet, for that special someone. And she has a new spell too, “Scythemare”, which…is basically Noelle’s Sleep Mist, but a little more expensive? Aight, whatever. 

Oh, hey, Diamond King! You’re out!

Scar? Learning more about King?

Oh. A kid ripped him slightly. Okay. That’s why the card deck was put away, seriously?

Susie, did you…sleep in Kris’ bed?

Oh, no spikes, got it. Fair enough. 

Kris lamp. 

Oh, Susie. 

That…Queen, we didn’t even make the Duck. Why. 

Oh, Susie wants to cook something! That’s…probably not gonna go great at first. 

And, Queen is playing Basketball with Lancer. Alright, whatever. 

Hey, Ralsei’s door is a shape now! Let’s see how his room is coming along!

…well, this is chaos.

And, Ralsei brought it down to nice and cozy. And Susie’s chill with it! 

Huh. Ladders work on claimb rules. 

Aw, Susie! Let him ranch!

God, I love these goobers so much. 

…wait, hang on, Lancer’s room vanished?

And…what is happening in this Bakery?

“Trashy Trio” fight, huh? No prize…eh, whatever. Let’s give it a shot. 

…what is happening in this game?

Is…is that the fucking secret boss leitmotif?

Oh, okay! I guess we’re doing this!

…alright, so, uh, this is weird. 

Why is Rouxls…I need to stop questioning shit, or this will take all day. 

Castle Town is weird. 

Okay, if the Trashy Trio are an indication, this chapter’s gonna be…”fun”. 

…the BATTAT motif?

Okay, this was fun, but it’s been almost two hours and I haven’t left Castle Town yet. Time to get this Girl to her Love…maybe. 

…I’m gonna make a back-up save, just in case I missed something important. 

Ralsei hug goodbye…

And her costume is…dust? Dirt? Looks great, Suze. 

Oh, hey, Noelle! What were you doing near School? And how does Susie’s hat look?

Oh god, I’m nauseous already. I need a quick break. 

(ONE AFTERNOON AND EVENING OF TRYING NOT TO THROW UP IN BED LATER)

Okay, I think I might just be sick, independent of the game. Nevertheless, we persist. 

So, checked the Chapter Screen, and this is called “Festival Day”, with a flower as the icon. Neat. Anyways, Festival Time. 

Oh, hey Library Bird! Manning a stand today? Really close to the distressed guy?

Already getting the “which pair” thing, and it’s the damn strength tester. Uh…I mean, maybe multiple pairs can do it? We’ll start with Suselle. 

Aw, cute. And no, one and done. Not sure how to read that result, tho. 

…it’s probably dangerous having the door to the Hospital blocked off like that. 

Rudy…is decorating Town Hall…on a very tall ladder…

Festival Royalty gonna be crowned later, huh?

Love the Church going goth. 

Oh, hey Catti! So you’re manning the crystal ball today?

Aw, Gerson’s note worked!

Veggitoid mummy!

Alphys jumpscare!

Noelle jittering!

Drink the blood! Funny animations!

Anyways, let’s chat to the angry goth lesbian. 

Weirdly specific fortune telling. 

Catti, don’t be an ass. 

Aw, I missed fortune telling, didn’t I? Now I’m gonna have to replay the entire chapter again from the start. 

Okay, yeah, Catti is definitely just jealous. 

Damn, Susie stole Noelle’s bottled water? Is everyone in this town weirdly oral?

“Evolution of hungry man’s life”?

We’ll save Ferris wheel for a bit later. 

Sans in two places. Of course. 

Ice Cream time!

Hey, Kris ate Noelle’s Ice Cream! And now she and Susie share? Nah, Sans cockblock.

Oh, so that’s what the picture is! Okay. 

Oh, Susie is so upset with this man. 

Temmie! Art?

Original Caricature! Yaya!

…is Sans just in charge of every ride today?

Hey, Mr. Cattenheimer! 

Oh, god, lot of pressure in the vote today. I’ll, uh…do what we were told. And show Noelle, because voter fraud, yes. 

Oh god no, Berdly. Please let this be…not terrible. 

Alright, he’s relatively chill. Not great, but, he’s not being a weirdo about it. 

No clue what Maddy’s talking about, but Metta sounds happy-ish at least?

Alright, I can’t decide between Lake, Dreemurr house, or rides. I’ll, uh…go House first. 

Aw, Mom’s gardening!

Oh, Susie…poor girl. 

I wonder if we even can go to Noelle’s house…let’s see. 

Huh. Milk Freak. 

Oh, it’s a concert thing. Fun. Let’s see how the Pizzapants subplot progresses. 

Well, at least Bratty feels kinda bad about it…

I have no clue what to do here, especially given the lying thing. I kinda think this is like a slightly lower stakes version of something, but I don’t know what. 

Eh, fuck it, NicePants, why not? Hope this doesn’t go horribly wrong!

Aw! It didn’t go too horribly…at least on stage. Off it, things went to shit real quick. But, hey, it was catfishing at the end of the day. 

Well, that was fun! And kind of a disaster. What now?

Oh, hey, Jockington! What’s up?

Oh, yeah, he’s gonna be both King and Queen. I forgot. Nice!

…oh, Noelle, you silly girl, we’re gonna end up accidentally destroying your life. 

And, he grew the beard. Oh no. 

Let’s check on the teacups. Any new ones?

…nope. 

Oh, wait, there’s one inside the other. 

I’m…not sure if the shore or the Ferris Wheel should come later. On one hand, feels like the Ferris Wheel is what’s been built up since Chapter 2, but on the other hand, ARG…but then again, I think that’s like mostly Snowgrave? But also, ugh, I don’t know! 

Screw it, I’ll try the Wheel, and if there’s a “Are you sure” thing, I’ll back down. 

Another fucking choice! And like, I don’t know what to do! I think it’s clear these two wanna be something together, but I don’t wanna leave Kris out of everything, and RAAAGH! 

Screw it. Let’s just, Yuri all the way, right?

Oh, I guess this also gives Kris a little bit to themself? Cool, I’ll do that. 

Oh, no, they just, didn’t think about it too hard. Fair enough?

Aw, and they talked about Kris! That’s, kinda expected at this point. 

…yeah, I’m definitely making a back-up of the festival start save so I can see what happens if Kris is actually included. 

Okay, so the Lake is the final thing for the Festival. Got it. 

Well, I think I’ve done everything I can for now. Might as well finish things off…god am I anxious about it. 

Finish Festival Go to Beach

Okay, they all get a moment away from us! Cool. 

…and Kris is collapsed face down…

Oh no, Noelle’s mom is calling. 

Oh thank god, Susie’s got it. 

These two are adorable. 

Three PM, and the suns setting? Damn. 

Crowning time…god I don’t know what’s gonna happen. 

Maybe staying here is for the best, actually?

I love these kids so much…I’m so fucking scared, man. 

Noelle! Ah, I love this! 

Okay, yeah, this is amazing…but oh my god, I feel like I’m gonna throw up, and I don’t know if it’s the nerves or a stomach bug. 

Oh no. Oh no oh god what’s going on. 

No, Rudy…

Susie, I’m…not sure we should follow her…but…

Okay, something’s very wrong. At least…Susie got distracted?

Kris…please be responsible. 

Yeah, I am kinda trash…

Knife…Kris, be reasonable. 

And…they left. 

Oh, and there’s the Dark World in the Flower King…Did Kris open that, or someone else?

And Asgore is definitely in there? Because, she was just in there, so she’d have seen him?

Kris, I…please be nice. 

And they fell backwards in. 

Fuck, I need another break. A…shorter one, this time. 

(A FEW HOURS LATER)

Alright, we’ve got the weird outskirts “music” again. What’s going on here?

ASGORE?!

Wait, what the FUCK?! ANIME?!

Who the fuck is this anime boy?! Is this Flowey?!

FLOWERY?!

Ain’t no way. 

What the fuck is this guy, and how is he doing all this? Because he sure as hell isn’t actually a human. 

RALSEI! You were in the closet?

Wow. Ralsei called a guy stupid. That’s new. 

Okay, so, something is DEFINITELY up. How and why, though?

Dude. Don’t call her that. 

And don’t call HIM that!

Oh, I so wanna kill this guy. 

At least we get hatted Ralsei pose? But man…this guy…

Oh, we can turn off Voice Clips in config. Neat. We can silence him. 

What…how is this here?

Oh…it’s pink now. 

The Garden…interesting. 

I…completely forgot to get a new Spincake. FUCK!

Floradinn is interesting. A bit tough to dodge, though. 

Aw, Susie is loyal!

And Susie can now equip ribbons…hm. 

And she wears them as Armbands. More appropriate for her. 

Well, Asgore and Flowery were interesting in the lake…is this wheat? I genuinely don’t know. 

Hm…I already have the Floradinn recruited? So…quickly?

This is all one big red herring, isn’t it.

Huh…dude was a Fox. 

This whole place is weird. I don’t know what’s going on, and it’s making me uncomfortable. 

Oh, I hate this dude. Stop calling her a princess. And be nicer to Ralsei. 

Okay, this dude is…so wrong. On so many levels. 

And now this battle is…wrong. 

This dude is fucking weird and I don’t like that Susie is warming up to him. 

I love the art this chapter, though. So damn good. 

Oh. Economic fraud. 

Watering can’t mechanic! Neat. 

How many currencies do I need?

Okay, Sheary, I understand you’re literally shears, but please don’t cut the battle box. 

This Thatchet seems…not great. 

God, I wish Kris could actually talk to us. So I could know if this guy is even slightly maybe real. 

The Diner…I feel like this whole thing is way too familiar, in way too many ways. 

That Rootbeer float does not look good. 

Oh, those are Roots…makes sense. 

Okay, a shop letting you sell, I understand. Why will the Diner buy my armors?

This OrangeJuice seems, not helpful at all, and very overpriced. 

Netskie…there’s a pun I’m not getting here beyond Kitsune. I like the faker mechanic though!

What the fuck is this guy? I turned off voice clips and he…ignored it? 

Okay, something seriously fucky is going on here, and I’m deeply uncomfortable. 

We’re in a video game. Now, Ralsei explains it.

Huh, that…okay? Whatever mind control thing is going on might wipe that from her later, but okay. 

…She’s fucking WHAT?!

Dude, this guy sucks. And I don’t know how to explain it. 

This “exit” sequence is uncomfortable in a whole new way. 

Asgore is asking about…a black river, rising out of the ground…

But Flowery will show him…okay…

Okay, I backtracked to the diner, new exit, and…what is this labyrinth?

Oh, that’s…that’s the soul.

Well, that would be Purple…who’s this kid?

Light Blue seems fun!

I guess the Light Blue soul always did have the toy knife…

Damn…first death of the Chapter, and it was to the first of the Flowers…at least now I can see what climbing would entail!

Oh…quick dead end. 

Alright, let’s try this again!

You know, I figured the Seven Flowers or whatever they’re called here would lean into the Undertale callbacks, I just didn’t think it would be this heavily. 

So Light Blue is a nice girl who just, doesn’t understand a whole lot. Fair enough!

Lot of doorframes so far…three already…I’m curious how this chapters gonna go. 

Hey, the feather!

“Petal Feather”, huh? That did…something. Something weird. 

And now this is a 2D platformer. Sick!

Okay, this is such a sick idea. I love this already. 

And the combat is completely different?! Oh my god, suddenly I’m so excited to keep playing. 

Oh, so those weird artifacts help switch between top down adventuring and 2D platforming…yeah, okay, this chapter might quickly become peak. 

Jack! You’re here!

(Cue the first section of every liveblog where I stop actually writing and just enjoy the media. Highlights include Tropical Starwalker, Destroying Bread, Dollar Sign Swearing, and backtracking)

Okay, so obviously Asgore and Flowery left while we were journeying, but that won’t stop us now!

Oh, hey, Dark Fountain. Neat. 

Oh, they’re right here. Okay. 

And now we’ve graduated to full abduction, huh? Good going Flowery fuck. 

And Kris isn’t taking any of his shit. Good on you, kid. 

Yeah, like that dude’s actually human. 

Beginning of the Cliffs, huh? What is this world’s name…assuming it even has one. 

It’s not a sunset. It’s a sunrise. 

“Aqua”…good name, I prefer Cyan. 

“Seth”? Really, Purple? Actually…no, I’ll call you Seth. If you want. 

Glad we’re just coming out and saying it now. 

Found definite wheat. Now, is this the egg spot, and I’m just getting unlucky, or…

Three splat teenagers…At least now Susie knows how it feels. 

Shi is fun. I…don’t get the pun, though. 

Man, with these Leaflings talking about Freedom and the world Revolving…Tony really said “Screw you, you can’t predict me for shit!”

What’s Asgore’s “Ideal World”, I wonder?

Okay, Aqua is the best. Also, fun bullet pattern! 

New Shop! Who’s this lanky character?

You know, when I wrote about the Flower King Dark World having weirdly human Darkners, it was just because I suck at names and designs. I didn’t think it would actually HAPPEN!

Okay, this feels like it’s DEFINITELY the Egg room. Let’s see…maybe the other side?

KawKaw is cute, but it’s weird just how many of these Darkners are fully recruited after one encounter. 

Okay, I had to look up how to get this egg. This is weird. But the dog is back! And annoying!

Hey, Tree. Any more explanations? 

I’ll…ask for more? I guess? Maybe?

“You have everything”, huh? Does that mean I have all the eggs now? None in Chapter 6 or 7?

I guess so. 

Now Kris and Ralsei are both wearing two Fox Hats. Neat!

I’ll be so real: in the Garden, this Dark World was making me so uncomfortable, I wasn’t sure if I liked this chapter. Now? Hell yeah, this kicks so much ass. 

Getting close to the Castle now…and I feel like there’s still stuff I’m missing. 

Stab us! I guess?

Okay, so, Seth likes Berdly, and also, threw away the mercy added to them?

Right, so, this is a semi-scripted fight, right? 

Aqua, you little chaos gremlin, I love you. 

Cool as heck little battle. Curious, though…

Flowery, I swear to god…

Okay, so, clearly you’re fucking with Asgore’s mind already, why would I believe this? Definitely going to feel shitty for Kris, but still. 

Oh, hey, we pulled him out of the Dark World!…for a moment. 

Oh, this is BAD bad, huh?

Back door time! Let’s…huh?

And now Susie’s questioning them…please either don’t figure it out, or don’t be mad. 

Oh thank god, she’s clueless. You’re safe for now, Kris. 

Okay, fair enough, you would have planned for that, wouldn’t you, Flowery?

Moss predicted too? Damn, this guy IS good!

Okay, so yeah, they DID make the Dark World! 

What…what do they want, exactly?

Oh, they gave away one of Berdly’s feathers. And…Susie is questioning how they have it, and they blush?

Okay, and here I take another break, because I’m recording these sessions and want them to be reasonable, and also I’m hungry. 

(ONE MCDONALD’S LARGE TEN PIECE CHICKEN MCNUGGET MEAL LATER)

Thats a lie, I had two of them. Did not help the nausea issue. 

Flower Castle, here we come. 

Hey, spiffy Ralsei! How you doing?

Not happy about it…fair. 

Ooh, cutscene! Nice. 

Sprout…interesting. 

Where are the damn doors? And how the hell do they connect? Because I’m missing one Shi to recruit them. 

Oh, wait, just saw Green! I think Yellow was the Cowboy from earlier, so…where’s Blue, exactly?

Oooh, Flower Tea Time? This seems interesting! And that’s what the Flowery Dollars were for!

Aww, Kris, it’s okay that you can’t do magic! You can do your own thing!

Oh, this Drink Dispenser is really cool! A lot of TP items, and a group heal! The question marks on three of these are, curious, though. 

Hmm…”My Secret”, huh? Let’s see. 

Oh, it restocks…fair enough. 

And that was Yellow changing their sock…his? If Yellow’s a CowBOY, then…eh, who knows?

BromideR is weird. 

Terakota is cool! 

Hey, Seth! You escaped from jail!

Asgore…what are you doing?

Okay, so, uh…maybe he’s not under mind control from Flowery after all…

Hm…so, Asgore has some softness for the other flowers…even when Flowery’s in the doghouse. Interesting…also, we’re still missing Blue and Orange. 

Okay, so, Asgore definitely knows at least a little about what happened in the past? But, his documents aren’t readable in the Dark World? For some reason?

Orange? That you?

I love these fists only doing one damage. It’s so cute. 

I think the chu joke is about kissing, but I could be wrong. Because it would also imply Ralsei was calling Kris a slut. 

Oh, poor Seth. 

Oh, hey, Green! You’re mute, huh? Fair. 

I don’t trust that Cheese. Probably for the best Kris didn’t eat any. 

Oh, no, it’s fine! Huh. 

Hmm…so, Aqua and Green can hang out…or Green can sit alone…

Aw, Green fed the child! 

Everyone loves Green!

I’m gonna go back to just playing the fun game I enjoy now. I’ll let you know if something important other than quirky characters happens. 

Oh, Orange is a mouse. And can’t do any actual damage. 

The…the sun is a green fox…what?

Green, defend Orange! Ralsei was being a bully!

Oh no, Green, I’m so sorry. 

Okay! Now we’re talking! Green and Orange FIGHT!

Oh…I died. 

AGAIN!

I…think Ralsei is doing micro-aggressions. 

That fight was interesting…I think Ralsei might be racist. 

Let’s…see what Susie and Green are doing, I think. 

Oh, no…instead we’re watching Ralsei. 

He’s…praying?

This talk seems…oddly meaningful. 

Okay, that Princess crack is…weird, but interesting. 

And Susie is checking Kris for lice. You two finally get a chance without me, and this is the shit you pull?

I hope, someday, Ralsei gets some Guts again. 

Seth! Yay!

Seth and Ralsei. The nerd…boys? Seth is traditionally a male name, but also their “King or Queen” thing has me questioning. Then again, so does Ralsei. 

Ralsei…likes the yellow bird that appears in Jevil’s act? What?

And Orange is…Ratatouille-ing Green? What?

Yellow time…ish. I guess. 

Ninja beetles! Or, uh…what were the bug guys from Undertale again?

More documents…

Oh, Asgore…please don’t say you’ll hurt them…

Nope, he’s going there. Kris, please don’t confess. 

Couldn’t have said it better myself, Susiezilla. 

Okay, so, now Flowery is actually making a decent point about Susie…

Oh, I wonder what their reaction to the Black Shard line would be if we HADN’T beaten the Knight?

So, the Knight DID make the Computer Lab fountain? Or, is this…I’m so confused. 

Okay, I’m dying a lot more in this Chapter than usual. 

Oh, hey Yellow!

…okay, I think we ruined a man’s life. 

…the way that punishes you (real bad) sounds fun!

God, Temmie and the team killed it this chapter. 

Evidence tab for items! Neat!

Shi! Yay!

This guy just…keeps making his own day worse. Because we needed to lie at 1 HP. 

Yeah, I ended Yellow’s bullet pattern fight with everyone at 1 HP. I am, not good at games. 

This man just keeps trying to come up with punishments for himself…maybe he’s just a masochist!

Okay, we saved the masochist from himself! Good…what were we doing again?

Blue seems fun…I can’t wait until they (she? he? I genuinely can’t tell if some of these are supposed to be gendered) try to kill us. 

Okay, these Doorframes have to activate EVENTUALLY, right?

…what the fuck is the red?!

Okay, time for the Blue and Yellow fight!

Aww, Susie’s Gumshoe, and Ralsei’s Maya!

Trial time. Kris is Edgeworth, of course. 

Justice is served. Seth smashed a flower, Green burnt a shirt, Aqua killed a handkerchief (what?), and Blue…stole Yellow’s petals. And trust. And heart!

I mean, I guess. We are all mostly dead, though. 

Flowery, don’t be mean. Especially while upside down. 

Let’s try the spring.

Aw…Ralsei likes them. He’s gonna be heartbroken. 

Do I make them say the sweet thing…or give them drinks…tough choice, but I’ll risk upsetting them with sweetness. 

Susie rocks. 

So, I guess Blue is a man? Maybe?

Oh…the Seven Flowers can’t come to Castle Town…so, if we seal the fountain, they’re…

Man, Aqua gets to hang with EVERYONE!

Yellow, do not give baby gun.

Blue is such a theater kid. 

Seth, I know you’re being nice to Susie technically, but still. 

Horse Ralsei returns! Riding Yellow…okay!

Seth is…okay, yeah, kinda cringe. 

Ralsei wants smoked herbs, because of course. 

The flowers are gay…good for them! Good for them. 

God, Susie is so gay. 

Both Yellow and Blue think they understand Green through food…and are mostly wrong. 

Another two hours, and I’m gonna be so for real, I am getting tired. But, I think I’m close to the end…except I’m still missing two pink coins and even a HINT of the Shadow Crystal. 

Sprout…beanstalk!

Asgore’s…abandoning the flowers.

I’m feeling ill again. 

Flowery…please be careful. 

Let’s go, $!?# Squad!

Oh, our titles have changed. Kris’ Dark Rose conveys departure, Susie’s Dark Vine assists in sealing the Fountain, and Ralsei’s Dark Vine is watering their own thorns…

Top of Castle…okay, I have no idea what else could happen, but I’m really getting tired. I need to sleep. So, a three day playthrough this chapter! Yay…

(ONE SEMI-RESTLESS NIGHT LATER)

Alright, I’m done avoiding half the internet. Let’s finish this. 

Ooh, Seth and a Shinobeetle! Interesting way to spice things up!

This is so cool…where is the door?

Flowery…this dilemma is impossible, you know that. 

Maybe I shouldn’t have told Aqua stabbing was cool…

Loving these later fights!

Ralsei’s getting so genuinely angry this chapter…it’s so interesting. 

Green, no! The door is right there!

Okay, phew. Now…there are so many doors to choose. 

Okay, another pink coin. If I had to guess, that shop on the cliffs has the Shadow Crystal boss, or something connected to it, so I just need all ten…assuming there are only ten. 

Okay, I’ve got ten of the coins! Now…to that weird shop. 

Got the MysteryKey…now where does it go?

For now, I’ll keep going with the main path. There are still two doors left to find, apparently!

Oh, they’re taking initiative! Good on you kids. 

If only I didn’t suck at platforming almost as much as bullet hell. 

Oh, Ralsei’s got the firepower…

“This way doesn’t lead to the fountain,” huh?

Huh…so there are more than 10. Also, big locked pink door?

The MysteryKey reacted, so…let’s hope this goes well. 

Hey, Orange! Now do we get to befriend you?

Is that…Mew Mew?!

Oh, Kris must be SO pissed. 

Aw, Mew Mew is so nice! I hate that I’ll probably have to smash her bullet patterns into pieces. 

Oop, Susie’s picked up on the miscount. 

Mad Mew Mew?!

I can get 8 TP…oh hey, I got the secret boss turning you Purple right!

Oh, no, this just straight up is Maddy! Okay, what the hell!

Damn, Pink got bombs! But, I mean, this is one fight I expected to struggle with, so, fair enough. 

I guess the Mad Mew Mew fight always was very similar to Muffet’s purple web…

Holy shit, I love this fight! One hell of a way to keep things interesting after five chapters of misdirects and turn arounds. Hell, kinda reminds me of the scrapped plan for Chapter 2 to just have actual Mettaton Neo. 

I even have a use for the stupid CD Bagel I still have in my items for some reason!

Damn, already almost at 15 Doki…

Alright, one more flirt! I think that’s the end…

What, VN?!

Oh…that was only 25%. Fair enough! Now, the meter’s reset, so let’s keep this interesting! 

So, Pink’s fighting with her body…yeah, that tracks. 

Okay, so we only have to do each Dating Sim sequence once? Across resets? I suppose. 

Now Pink is two people! Which is…one way to cope with a bad break up. 

Oh, so the doll is a Darkner now! That actually makes a lot of sense…I think? But wait, does that mean…what does that mean, in the grand scheme of things?

God this is hard.

(MANY ATTEMPTS LATER)

Okay, so just the first dating sequence is an auto clear after attempt 1. Got it. 

(MANY MORE ATTEMPTS LATER)

Okay, FINALLY got to the third dating sequence! And…it’s not going well. 

So, uh…Susie’s on 5 HP, the others are down, Pink’s body is on its knees, the Doki meter is glitching, and she’s on 75% mercy. 

Aw…this finale is so sweet! I really hope she gets to keep her happy ending…somehow. 

Yay! She’s coming to Castle Town! Probably could only work because she’s otherwise a ghost, but still cool!

Okay, so you ARE the Shadow Crystal boss! I…wonder what the “Lost” part of this dream is. 

And the hammer guy can locate pink coins for some Flowery Dollars! Nice!

Oh, and…beating her unlocks a hidden place…I can already see the apron and specs. 

So, choose three, link with coins…we have Seth’s glasses, Green’s apron, Orange’s gloves, Blue’s shoes, Yellow’s hat, and Aqua’s knife…god this is gonna be a hard one. Even if I GET all the coins. 

AquaKnife: Easier crits for Kris. 

BlueShoes: Ralsei’s Pacify becomes free. 

SethSpecs: Increases I-frames as armor. 

GreenApron: Recover HP when defending. 

O.Glove: Armor that cheapens Scythemare. 

YellowHat: Improves spells by 20%. 

Time to go Pink Coin hunting!…in a bit. I’ve been playing for two hours, I need some time to think for myself. 

(ONE SNACK TIME LATER)

Alright, time to hunt down eight pink coins with the help of the internet! Sorry, Malius’ cousin, but I ain’t paying that much. 

Oh, hey, I can take breaks with Pink and Orange! Cool!

Aqua is questioning names, gender, and Seth. 

Orange wants to look human so bad. 

Seth, you aren’t helping with that. 

Yellow gave her a new hat though!

Green…how were you even feeding Starwalker?

Blue and Orange have THREE WHOLE SCENES?!

Orange and Susie really are similar…just not in the expected ways. 

Ralsei don’t be racist to mice challenge: Difficulty not impossible, I suppose. He’s really getting sore about the hat thing, though. 

Aww, Pink is getting accepted! I love her so much. 

And finally, Pink and Kris…Kris, you broke that poor girl’s heart. Now I have a moral dilemma…I’ll say “Listen, I was serious!” and…make her blow herself up?

Anyways, back to the coin hunt. 

Aw, the cliffs shop is Pink and Orange chilling together. 

Okay, I got all nine Pink Coins…now what the hell to get?

Well, it’ll be nice to get Ralsei a dedicated weapon, since Kris and Susie both have them from the previous Crystal bosses. And if I get the BlueShoes, I gotta get the YellowHat. And given my play style, I think the best choice for last is the GreenApron. 

Did I choose wisely? I don’t know. 

Oh…Flowery?

FloweryScarf…Ralsei’s Ultimate Weapon. 1 F$. He won’t wear it, but…maybe some day.

For now, give him some BlueSuedeShoes. 

Alright…it’s done. Now all that’s left…is the top of the castle…and the Fountain. 

Hey, Orange! And…everyone else?!

Okay, cool as hell. Now then…is this the end?

Castle Top…god I’m nervous. 

Oh, yeah, and Kris’ title updated. Pink Rose: Flirtatious, and flirtatious. 

Hey, Flowery. What’s up?

So, you don’t want to fight, but…is our fantasy stronger than yours?

Man…Asgore really cared for these flowers, huh?

What the hell?! Orange soul?!

Damn, this fight…we lost. 

Oh no. 

Damn it, this means any items used are permanently lost…so I can’t use items. 

This is going to be hard. 

God…bringing in the other flowers…this is so cool. 

No more words, huh? Weren’t expecting me to suck this badly?

Man, I am struggling here…cool as hell fight, though. And I need to hear this song with vocals within the week. 

Damn it. Made it up to Blue and Yellow that time. 

Fuck it. I bought three more Phanta. 

Okay, I think I triggered the “oh, this player sucks, let’s give them tons of TP” mechanic. 

Those fucking bamboo stalks get me every time!

RALSEI!

Damn it, I got right near the end and I biffed it! At least I can confirm, we do get our items back…but still. 

Okay! Susie’s Idea!

We…we’re so high up…

We got him…with one last strike!

Asgore…please stay sane…

Okay, this sequence is…insane. 

Can…can this be the good ending? 

Wow…Flowery made Asgore realize how creepy he was being. That’s…probably a good way to do that redemption, then. 

…someone has to take care of the flowers. 

Flowery…

Oh…please don’t make me say goodbye to everyone. 

No! Genuinely, don’t!

Fuck…

Well…once more…let’s close the fountain. 

Ralsei and Flowery are here to watch…

…huh?

A SECOND FOUNTAIN?!

NO!

The Knight! Flowery, please be safe!

Flowery!

Oh, this is horrifying. 

Fuck…this is heartbreaking. 

We were so close…we were so close to everything working out…

Oh, Kris…you couldn’t keep it from her forever. 

0915199X…so it’s eight digits?

It’s night time…

We’re…walking her home?

Oh…to Castle Town. That’s…that’s what she considers home, now. 

We do make a good team, Susie…

Oh, girl…

Kris…

That’s the end…holy shit. 

Susie comes back home…everyone happy to see her, she sets thing up for Noelle to join…and goes to bed in her room…

And Kris, unreadable as ever, walks away. 

To be continued in Chapter 6. See you kids there…