Carley 22 Sydney

I got my mother’s insanity and her trust issues and my father’s temper and his secretive ways. They never were the most stable people. Imagine what I’m like when I’m the two of them together as one person.

what gives you the strongest pain is probably the same thing that once gave you the greatest joy

I need solitude. I need space. I need air. I need the empty fields round me; and my legs pounding along roads; and sleep; and animal existence.

I wanted so badly to lie down next to her on the couch, to wrap my arms around her and sleep. Not fuck, like in those movies. Not even have sex. Just sleep together in the most innocent sense of the phrase. But I lacked the courage and she had a boyfriend and I was gawky and she was gorgeous and I was hopelessly boring and she was endlessly fascinating. So I walked back to my room and collapsed on the bottom bunk, thinking that if people were rain, I was drizzle and she was hurricane

I refuse to tell anyone how bad it really got again.