A Blog for incorrect quotes

Magna: Listen up. I'm going to explain the drill.

Vanessa drunk: Yeah. It's a test of courage, I dare ya.

Magna: You shouldn't be drinking on the job.

New recruit: Okay. Hold on a sec! Didn't she say she was 18? That makes her a minor.

Magna: Wait, 18? Don't be ridiculous. This year she'll be turning 2-

*Gets hit by a can

Vanessa: Uh oh. My hand slipped.

Magna really angry: Cut the crap and get to work already.

*Weisz calls her again

Rebecca: Hello?

Weisz: Weisz Steiner speaking. Don't hang up.

Rebecca: Weisz? Oh it's you. I thought I had a stalker or something.

Weisz: Wha? I show up on caller ID.

Rebecca: So? For all I know, a serial killer could have gotten a hold of your phone.

Weisz: Ho ho. A veil confession that Arsenal strikes fear into your hear-

*Rebecca hangs up again

Noelle: Yeah, but...

Kahono: Well... If you don't do it yourself. Then I suppose I'll have to give you a little push.

*Kahono walks up to Asta

Kahono: Well, if it isn't the famous anti-magic wielder, Asta. May I the unassuming priestess of the Seabed Temple, Kahono, please have the honour of this dance.

Asta: Huh?

Kahono: Oh no! How terrible! I've suddenly remembered a matter I must attend to! What a retched Woman I am! Abandoning a handsome man after inviting him to dance! May I request your cooperation, Noelle?! Please come and dance with Asta in my stead.

Noelle: Huuuuuh?!!

Witch: Patience, Rebecca. They'll be here in a moment. You seem a bit on edge.

Rebecca: There's a good chance we're about to destroy all life on this planet, including ours and my Guild Master's. So, yes, I'm a bit on edge. Why aren't you?

Natsu: Two. Yeah, two. 'Cause if there was just one then...

Lucy pushing a blanket into Natsu's face: Two.

Natsu: Two. Two.

Rogue: If you stay, you'll just get in our way!

Minerva: Yeah! Leave!

Yukino: They're right. You won't be any use here... Sorry.

*Sting deflates

Layla: No, it's worse than bad. I'm scared by your absolute lack of fashion sense.

Nashi: Uh... excuse me?! Well, obviously I was just kidding around. Come on. Did you actually think I was being serious?

*Nashi goes to take the badge back but Layla keeps slapping her hand away.

Nashi: Geez, what is with you?

Layla: The moment you put it on me, ownership of this button transferred to me. If you try to take it back, you're guilty of robbery.

Wendy: A sure thing.

Fanzell: No. Not really.

Dominante: You sure? Absolutely no injuries at all?

Fanzell: Yeah, I'm fine. I mean it. Nothing's wrong!

Dominante: Okay. That's good to hear. Know why?

Fanzell: Uh?

Dominante: Because now I can hit you as punishment for your stupidity.

Natsu: Oh have you come to insult me and tell me how to live my life too?

Wendy: Um... No. You're not going to believe this but Queen Hisui is here.

Natsu and Lucy: Huh?

*Outside Fairy Tail

Natsu: Well I'll be. It's really her.

Shiki: Okay.

Rebecca: So where is it, then?

Shiki: You told me not to tell you.

Lucy: This isn't a deathmatch. Also, no magic. I want this to be nice, safe, non-fatal fun.

Nashi dejectedly: Fine.

Gray: Natsu is currently in the town square on a hot romantic date with Lucy. I mean he's on Patrol.

*Pyramids start crumbling and are destroyed

Nashi: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! You broke the Pyramids!!

Lucy: What did we do?

Natsu: Eh, we went a bit nuts in there, don't you think? Crazy.

Yami: You wake me? You die.

*One of Luck's lightning bolts hits Yami Waking him up.

Magna: It was his fault!

Yami: Don't care. I'm crushing you both!

Noelle: This is camping, not a picnic. And will you stop hitting the tent like that or it's going to-

*The tent crumples