life ramblings
i ran into my ex boyfriend on xmas eve and i havent been able to stop thinking about him. i was young and really thought i was going to marry him. our families loved us and loved each other. we really loved each other. it feels like it was all a dream - memories feel fuzzy but warm and familiar.
a lot has happened since we were together last. he broke off an engagement, im getting divorced. i couldnt help but look at him with his family and think of what's changed. his baby brothers are grown with wives and kids of their own. his parents have aged. we've gotten older.
i wonder if he ever thinks of our baby. does he hold his newborn nephew and wonder if our baby would have looked like that? does he ever wonder about our 9 year old kid and that life in another timeline? our days consumed of dishes and school projects. would we have found a way to make it work if my body wasn't broken?
i cant stop thinking about the time i ran into him when i was dating someone else. he made obvious attempts of checking me out and it made my date jealous.
he told me not to date my husband in the first place. im delusional and maybe things havent worked out for us individually for a reason


















