Welcome, lovely

The door creaked open before you could speak. An imp with wide eyes stepped in. “Miss? You’re needed in the lounge. All three Vees are waiting for you.”

The way he said all three was too careful. Like he knew it would rattle you. And it did. Your pulse kicked up, sitting up straighter.

Velvette, Valentino… and Vox, but this time with eyes that might not look at you like a lover…What did they want? What did they know? And why did it suddenly feel like your perfect morning was turning into a performance you hadn't rehearsed for?

“Did they say why?” you asked, voice cool despite the tightness starting in your chest.

The imp shook his head too fast. “No, ma’am. Just said to make sure you were dressed nice.” Of course they did.

A curl of unease twisted in your stomach. This smelled like a trap. You stood slowly, already calculating. You already had the info you wanted to give Charlie. Should you text her? No, it would be better if you told her in person, and explained more thoroughly.

You took your time. There was a mini fridge there as well. You made some coffee and he had…shark-shaped cookies? You shrugged and ate it as well. While you were gone bathing, the imp had also brought a tray full of different breakfast options. You picked at the lavish spread—hellfruit, spiced eggs and toasted bread charred just right.Vox didn’t seem to skimp on hospitality…

Your fingers twitched around the last sip of your coffee. You didn’t know which version of the Vees would be waiting, and you hated that uncertainty.

By the time you reached the hallway leading to the Vees' private lounge, the imp had scurried off somewhere, sensing it was safer not to stick around. You stopped in front of the tall doors. They were cracked open, just slightly, voices floating through. Your stomach fluttered in a way that had nothing to do with fear and everything to do with the game you were about to walk into.

You took a breath and pushed the door open with the other. Three sets of eyes turned to you. Vel was draped over the arm of a chaise, sipping from a crystal glass with a wicked grin. Val was slouched like royalty in a leather armchair, smoke curling from his cigarette. Vox stood near the massive screen wall.

You stepped in. Valentino’s eyes dragged over your frame. “Well, well. Looks like someone had a good night.”

Velvette laughed. “You look comfy, babe. Breakfast good?”

You tilted your head. “Delicious.”

Vox’s expression didn’t change, but there was a flicker of something in his eyes.

Oh, you were spiraling.

Not from guilt. No, never guilt. Just… logistics.

Because technically, you hadn't made any promises. Not to Vox. Not to Val. Not to Vel. There were no labels. And anyway—the Vees were poly. Open. That’s what the entire hell knew about them. They shared toys. Broke them together. Sometimes they passed them around like cocktails. Sometimes they fought over them just to spice things up.

So really, what were you guilty of? Nothing. Right? Still, your brain wouldn’t shut up.

Velvette was the first to move, her heels clicked across the room, each step was measured, languid. Her amused gaze never left yours, like a cat playing with a mouse before the kill. “You know, sweetheart,” Vel purred, breaking the stillness like a glass shattering on marble, “we could’ve kept this all light. Had fun. But you had to make it personal.”

You startled. “I don’t understand—”

Behind her, Valentino’s chuckle was low, burning with something darker than amusement. “You know what I hate, doll?” he asked, his voice smooth but with an edge that made your skin prickle. “I hate when someone plays me.”

Your chest tightened, and you couldn’t find your footing. “Okay,” you said, trying to keep your voice steady, “What the fuck is going on—?”

And then, Vox stepped forward. His presence was like a heavy shadow falling over you. His eyes locked onto yours, glowing faintly, unreadable. “You lied to us,” he said, his voice a slow, smooth drawl.

Your stomach dropped. It felt like the floor had disappeared beneath your feet, leaving you to hang in midair. For a moment, you couldn’t speak, couldn’t move.

“What?” Your voice was raw, sharp—denial, a reflex.

Vox didn’t blink. His gaze never wavered. Velvette’s laugh was soft but dark. “Thought you could slide in all pretty, ride us, and sneak back to her with all the juicy little secrets, huh?”

The words hit you like a slap to the face, sharp and stinging. You opened your mouth to speak, but nothing came out. Vox was still staring at you, still calm but cold. “Little Princess Morningstar must be very proud of your performance.”

Your mind spun, scrambling for answers, for something to hold onto, but you couldn’t make sense of anything. But the truth was already in the room, hanging heavy and damning, no matter how hard you fought against it.

Vox didn’t say anything at first. Instead, he raised his hand, just a small gesture. The lights cut out. The room plunged into darkness, and behind you, the screen flickered to life. The images were sharp and clear, the footage showed you hugging Charlie, talking very clearly what you intended for the Vees. The silence that followed was unbearable.

You were frozen. “How long,” Vel’s voice sliced through the quiet, “were you fucking us while working for her?”

“I wasn’t—!” Your voice cracked, but it was already too late.

And then, Vox whispered softly almost affectionate. “I adored you.”

You staggered back a step, breath caught in your throat. The words were a confession, an accusation, a punch in the gut. Valentino turned his head away, his jaw tight, but it was there—the flicker of betrayal in his eyes. Velvette didn’t smile anymore, she didn’t even look at you.

You stepped back. “No,” your voice barely a whisper. “No, you don’t understand, it wasn’t like—”

Another step. Then another.

“I didn’t… I didn’t mean… I wasn’t—” Your voice cracked as panic clawed its way up your spine. Your chest constricted, and vision blurred. Your body took over before your mind could stop it. You turned and ran.

_____________________________

Thoughts jumbled in a million different directions, but one thing remained crystal clear in your mind: You had to get out.

Your legs carried you automatically like instinct. Down another hall. A sharp left. The V Tower’s labyrinthine design was no mystery to you; you’d studied it for weeks.

Only Charlie could get you out of here. You ripped your phone out, fumbling with the screen as you flew down the stairs. Your thumb hovered over the screen, shaking from the adrenaline. The call connected."Charlie," you gasped, voice tight with panic, barely able to keep it together. “Charlie, I need your help. I’m in trouble—I'm—”

Awful glitching filled your ears. You yelped, tearing it away from your ear and staring as Vox’s face appeared. “Darling, we didn’t finish our talk.”

Your fingers shook as you threw the phone down and it shattered.

You’re on your own. The thought settled coldly in your chest, a weight of finality sinking deep into your bones. You kept eyes trained on the stairs below, forcing your legs to keep moving, one foot after another.

You were almost there. Just a few more turns. A few more goddamn steps.

Then—BOOM.

The wall to your left exploded in a cascade of flame and stone. You shrieked, flinging yourself to the ground as debris rained over like ash from a funeral pyre. Dust clouded the air in a suffocating wave.

Valentino stepped through first, adjusting his pristine fur jacket, brushing rubble from his shoulder with deliberate flair. Right beside him, Velvette huffed and said to Val. “That was my wall you blew up, jackass.”

But Val ignored that and looked at you. “Going somewhere, sweetheart?” he drawled, voice rough and venomous.

“Aw,” Velvet pouted, her eyes glowing like twin pink stars in the smoky dark. “You didn’t even say goodbye.”

Your heart nearly stopped. You turned on your heel, every muscle screaming as you sprinted back—Only to find him.

Vox, standing in the middle of the corridor like a vision summoned from your worst nightmare. No emotion in his face. He didn’t move. He didn’t need to.

You were trapped. Fuck.

You looked left…nothing but stone. Right…just the broken wall and the flaming rubble. Forward, Vox. Behind, Val and Vel.

Nowhere to run.

“You don’t get to walk out,” Vox said, his voice distorted. “After all that you did.”

You clenched your fists, swallowing down the terror, forcing yourself to breathe. Think. THINK. But there were no secret doors here. No windows. No distractions.

The game was over.

______________________________

The world tilted sideways as you kicked and writhed, fists pounding against Valentino’s back to absolutely no effect.“Put me down, you son of a—!”

“Now why would I do that, dollface?” He purred. He had hoisted you over his shoulder like you weighed nothing. You twisted, elbowed, clawed—nothing. His grip was iron, steady even as you thrashed like a wildcat. Vel skipped beside them, unbothered, humming while Vox trailed behind in complete silence.

You couldn’t get a read on them. Not when your blood was roaring in your ears and the taste of dread coated the back of your throat like smoke.

Val's laughter rumbled through his chest, jolting her. “You really thought you could play us, huh?” he said, casually, like this was a flirty conversation at a bar and not a kidnapping. “Spy on us, lie to us, take our cocks and our secrets, then waltz out like you were never ours?”

“I wasn’t yours,” you hissed, struggling harder. “I never said I was—”

He smacked your ass. “You acted like it,” he said, sharp and low now, all venom under the charm. “And that counts, sweetheart.”

You grind your teeth. You hated the weight of not knowing what came next. You wanted control back. Just something. You opened your mouth to speak, to argue, to distract—

“Don’t waste your breath,” Vox said flatly from behind them. “We’re not doing this for information.”

For a moment, your brain stalled—caught between panic and disbelief.

This was about them. Their bruised pride. Their ego.

God, the bed. It was ridiculous. Huge, overstuffed and drenched in red silk sheets and many pillows. With a slow, deliberate motion, Val tossed her down onto the oversized bed in the center of the room. You bounced once on the mattress, then settled, wrists pulled gently up as Val clipped the cuffs to the headboard with a quiet click. "Comfortable?" Vox drawled. His screen held a crooked smile, cold at first glance but something else flickered beneath it. Amusement and affection. And maybe... a little bit of hurt.

You were restrained, yes, arms stretched above your head, wrists snug in those cuffs but still trying to stare him down like you were in control. It’s cute… it’s infuriating. It makes his circuits hum with something just shy of hunger.

That fire in your eyes dared Vel to get closer. Her eyes roamed from the rise of your chest to the curve of your thighs. Still trying to hold your pride, even now.

Val reaches out, brushing the back of his knuckles over her collarbone. You shiver, not from the cold, from him.

The shame of being caught should’ve made you shrink. But instead, it made your thighs clench. You knew you could break out of these flimsy cuffs…but you didn’t want to. You wanted to see this through.

Valentino shrugged out of his shirt first. He gave you a dangerous grin, letting you take in the view before unbuckling his belt, his pants sliding down his hips. Vox discarded his jacket carelessly, revealing the sharp lines of his chest, his eyes never leaving yours, daring you to look away. And Velvette, always the tease, unzipped the back of her dress with languid grace, letting it slip down her body, leaving her in nothing but delicate lace lingerie that hugged every curve.

Vox leaned in close, brushing your cheek with the back of his fingers, eyes glittering with amusement and something darker. “Let’s play a little game, sweetheart,” he murmured, his lips grazing your ear. “If we can make you cum first… every round, no breaks, no begging out — then you stay. You’re ours. Forever.”

Valentino was already grinning like he couldn’t wait to win, Velvette practically purring with excitement.

“And if you don’t?” you rasped.

He smirked. “If we cum first…then you get to walk. Back to your precious little hotel and your redemption arc.” He traced a slow circle over your thigh. “No hard feelings.”

_______________________________

The silk cuffs dug into your wrists, not painfully — just enough to remind you weren't going anywhere for a while.

Vox moved between your thighs. His sharp, elegant claws pushed your knees wider apart, dragging it along the soft skin of your inner thighs. Your body arched at the first teasing brush of his tongue, every lick purposeful and smooth. He pinned your hips down with strong hands, not letting you squirm away, breathy whimpers falling from your lips almost as if he had mapped every nerve.

“Already moaning, baby?” Valentino climbed onto the bed, his cock heavy and throbbing in his hand as he moved above your chest. He brushed his cock against your lips. “You know what to do, muñeca,” he purred, dragging the head across her bottom lip, smearing precum. “Open up and take it like a good girl.”

Your eyes flicked up at him, defiant even as your lips parted and took him in. Your tongue curled around the head of his cock. Vox’s tongue flattening against your clit, his fingers spreading your folds wide as he devoured you like a man starved. Every flick of his tongue was deliberate, every suck timed to the slow rock of Valentino’s hips. They moved in sync, overwhelming you from both ends and you couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think.

Velvette had curled up beside you like a contented kitten, her pretty lace panties already pushed to the side for her slender fingers to slip into her slick heat without hesitation. Two fingers teased her folds, slow at first, tracing lazy circles against her clit while she watched everything—the rise and fall of your chest, the way your mouth stretched around Valentino, the twitch of your thighs under Vox’s tongue.

Vel groaned softly but edged with something darker. “God, watching you like this…” She gasped as her fingers picked up speed, rubbing tight, practiced circles that made her thighs tense. “You’re so fucking hot like this.”

Her eyes fluttered half-shut as her hand moved faster, slick sounds mixing with the obscene rhythm of the bed creaking beneath them. She was so wet—fingers gliding over her clit, then dipping inside herself, only to drag that arousal back up and rub it in harder.

Vel moaned softly as she rubbed her clit faster, but it wasn’t enough anymore. She needed to taste you, to touch more. Her lips hovered over your chest, those pretty nipples already stiff from the cold air and stimulation.

“That's it, baby…Look how good you're taking it.” Velvette whispered, then closed her mouth around one nipple, sucking hard. She moaned, her hand between her legs growing frantic as she ground into her own palm. She sucked again, wet and noisy, leaving red marks around the delicate peak before kissing it softer, almost sweet.

Valentino’s hips rolled in slow, deep thrusts, filling your mouth with every stroke, keeping a steady rhythm. One of his hands tangled in your hair, not harsh, but insistent, like he was guiding you where he wanted you. “Fuck, baby,” he groaned, low and drawn out. “Mmm, that's it, take it all.”

The soft wet sounds echoed off the plush walls of the room, mixing with Velvette’s whines and Vox’s low growl from between your thighs.

Val looked down at you—tears pricking the corners of your eyes, spit glistening on your lips, your lashes fluttering as your throat flexed to take him. You gasped, hips twitching involuntarily and that made Vox grin. He latched onto your clit then and sucked hard. You whimpered, mouth still full of Val’s cock, and Vox moaned darkly in response, tongue circling tighter and faster, a perfect spiral of pressure. His fingers slipped between your folds, sliding in effortlessly, curling with calculated cruelty as he found that perfect spot. The spot that made your thighs jerk, made you cry around Val’s cock, made Vel whimper in giddy delight beside you.

“Doll, you aren’t even fighting that hard.” Vox whispered, voice glitching with pleasure as he fucked you with his fingers. “You want to be ours, don’t you?”

He sucked again, relentless as his tongue flicked with maddening speed, fingers curled deep, pumping in as you moaned around Val’s cock. Your thighs started to shake.

Vel moaned with you, grinding her fingers faster. “She’s close,” she whimpered. “I can feel it—"

Val’s thrusts stuttered,“F-Fuck—baby, I’m—” he growled, voice breaking, and with a deep groan, he spilled down your throat. He held your jaw gently, thumbs rubbing your cheeks as he watched you try to swallow around him. At the same time, your thighs spasmed around Vox’s head.

Velvette bit gently down on your nipple as her body twitched as she came against her own hand. She moaned, voice cracking with release. “That's it, baby, that's it...Give in to us... fuck, you’re so perfect when you come."

“That's my girl... Just like that. Fuckin’ perfect for me.” Vox murmured, finally lifting his mouth from you, chin wet with slick.

Valentino pulled out slowly, panting, then leaned down and kissed you hard. Your body was floating… barely noticing Val pulling away, murmuring something low and filthy in your ear as he stroked your cheek. Your lips tingled from the stretch of him, saliva still dripping down your chin.

Before you could try to come back to senses, Velvette was straddling your chest, knees digging into the sheets on either side. Vel spread her folds with two fingers, slow and teasing. “Eat up, sweetheart,” she said, voice high and playful.

And then she lowered herself, grinding down onto your mouth with a breathless gasp. You moved your tongue, your hazy mind obeying on its own. Velvette let out a high-pitched moan, her hands flying to the headboard to steady herself. “F-fuck, yes—just like that,” she gasped, her voice already cracking. “Smart girl, such a pretty mouth…”

She was dizzy, but then Vel cried out above you, thighs trembling against your cheeks, clit sensitive to every stroke. And that’s when your brain, calculating even under pressure…Velvette's already cum before, so she’s sensitive, you thought, eyes glinting beneath lashes. If you can make her come first, you win this round.

You focused. Your tongue darted, circling tight and fast around her clit with expert precision. You flattened it, then flicked it just right, small repeated strokes that made Vel’s whole body jolt. Vel gasped, head thrown back, fingers white-knuckled around the headboard. “W-wait—,” Her voice was high and breathless, hips twitching. “Oh fuck—”

But you didn’t stop. You angled your head just slightly, lips sealing around Velvette’s clit now, and sucked hard. Meanwhile, Val had slumped back against the pillows, one hand resting on his thigh while the other wrapped around his cock, lazily pumping. Because the sight before him? Fucking art. “She’s too fuckin’ clever for her own good,” Val purred, voice thick.

But below them, Vox had gone still. “Still scheming?” he murmured as he leaned forward, palms pressing into the mattress on either side of your hips. You didn’t answer, mouth still on Vel. But your thighs tensed around him.

“You’re so clever,” Vox said, voice dripping with affection. He reached down, brushing the swollen, soaked lips of her pussy with the head of his cock, teasing. “Go ahead, beautiful. Outsmart me. Outsmart all of us. I’ll just have to fuck the fight outta you.”

Without warning, he sank in. One smooth, devastating thrust. You jerked, a muffled cry vibrating against Vel’s pussy as your back arched off the bed, every muscle going taut with the sudden fullness. It stopped your movements around her clit, which gave Vel some reprieve. Scheming bastard.

Vox let out a low moan, his eyes fluttering shut for a second. You clenched around him, involuntarily. “Oh,” he chuckled, voice glitching. “Sensitive already? Sweetheart, I haven’t even started yet.”

He pulled back halfway, savoring the friction then drove in again, harder this time. Not sloppy or rushed, but precise, like everything he does. Each thrust made you moan into her pussy, sending vibrations up through Velvette’s sensitive core. Vel’s thighs tighten around your head. “Sh-she’s still licking—!” She cried out, her hands scrambling for the headboard again. “She’s still going, Vox!”

“Of course she is,” Vox moaned darkly, leaning down to kiss the inside of your knee as he kept thrusting. “She knows what’s at stake.”

He set a brutal, perfect pace, each stroke driving deeper, angled to hit every sensitive spot inside you. Your slick coated his cock, every thrust more obscene than the last. 

“I told you,” he said, his thrusts never faltering. “You don’t come cum first, you walk. But if we make you come first… you stay.” His grin widened. “And I’m going to make sure you fucking do.”

You gasped against Vel, your tongue faltering. No, no. You had a point to make. You knew you could make Vel come first. He reached between them now, fingers finding your clit, throbbing from before. He rubbed tight, sharp circles, perfectly synced with each brutal thrust. But you didn’t give up either.

And then Velvette came, hard and fast and messy, grinding helplessly against your face as her whole body convulsed. Vox’s rhythm faltered, and he pulled out.

The cuffs rattled as you tried to lift your head, smug satisfaction glowing under the flushed exhaustion in your eyes. You licked your lips. “Don’t pout, you’ll get another chance to lose to me later." The Vees definitely didn't like that. You won this one.

Vox was done playing nice. He didn’t yell, just spoke, cold and crisp. “Turn her over.”

Val’s hands slid under your thighs, and Vel laughed, her hands already slipping beneath the cuffs to help. Your hips were lifted and your body turned. Face down, ass up, chest pressed into the soft pillows.  

Velvette was in front of you again. She pulled out a strap-on, the harness hugged her hips tight. It jutted upward, inches from your face. Her fingers slid into your hair, tilting your chin up until their gazes locked. “You’ve got such a smart fuckin’ mouth,” Vel said sweetly, “Let’s see if it’s good for anything useful.”

The first push was gentle. She let the tip slip between your lips. She held eye contact like a challenge, even as your cheeks flushed deeper. You opened wider. Vel’s breath hitched, watching your tongue swirl around the base, lips stretching to take the length. Your throat bobbed. You gagged once, eyes fluttering, but didn’t stop. Vel was content after the last orgasm, and now wanted you to fall apart completely.

Valentino groaned low behind you. “Fuckin’ hell,” he muttered, dragging a golden claw up the back of your thigh, slow and deliberate. “All mouthy until we put somethin’ in it.”

Vox, off to the side, chuckled with static hum. “She is a fast learner,” he said lazily, stroking himself as he watched. 

Vel’s hands were on your hair, guiding her movements. The dildo slid in and out with maddeningly slow precision. And that was when you felt the shift.

Vox moved beneath you, the faint scrape of his fingers against your hipbones. His cock, hard and heavy, pressed against your entrance. Vox’s cock pushed forward as he sank deep inside you, filling you in a way that made your body shudder and pulse with need. “Fuck…” Vox groaned, eyes dark as he took his time, letting you adjust to him. “Fuck, you’re so good, baby. Taking me like the perfect little thing you are.”

Vel added more pressure, her thrusts growing harder, more demanding as she hit the back of your throat. You let out a loud moan, swallowed by Vel’s movements.

Vox smirked at the sound, a low chuckle rumbling through his chest as he pushed deeper. “That’s it,” he murmured. “You can’t hide what you want forever, sweetheart. You like this, don’t you?”

Vox’s hands gripped your hip as he drove into your soaked pussy. His voice glitching between low moans and dark laughter. “Oh, baby, I know you're sharp, but you can’t think your way out of this, can you?"

Behind you, Valentino’s lubed fingers circled your rim, pushing inside inch by slow inch while you moaned around Velvet's strap-on. Vox thrust up harder, fucking you onto his cock and making your whole body jolt. 

With one hand Val gripped your hip, holding you steady as his fingers pressed inside you. He stretched you open gradually. His palm smoothed up your back, tracing the shape like he was learning it by memory. “Y’know,” he murmured, leaning in to press his lips to your shoulder, “I’ve had a lotta whores. But you? You’re the one I think about when I jerk off. You’re the one I want moanin’ my name ‘til your voice breaks.”

Then, with one smooth roll of his hips, he lined himself up and pushed inside. Deep, stretching, burning in the most exquisite way. He didn’t rush. Valentino sank into you, taking you like he owned your soul. You cried out, back arching but he groaned, a rich, filthy sound. “Fuck... tight as ever.”

Then Valentino drove into you, slow but relentless, stretching you open until you cried out. Sandwiched between Vox, Valentino and Velvette, your mind reeled. Every thrust from below shoved you onto Val’s cock, every lazy rock of his hips pushed you deeper onto Vox, and both their movements shoved you forward, taking more of the dildo harnessed to Vel.

Vox’s hand slid to your clit. "Come for us," he ordered, voice ragged. "Show us how fucking good you have it."

You shattered with a strangled sob, body clenching down so hard on both of them that Vox cursed loud and spilled inside you, twitching as he filled your pussy. Valentino groaned against your back, grinding deep inside he came too.

Vel kissed your forehead sweetly, cooing, "Good girl... That’s our girl."

_______________________________

You sat slouched in a giant cushioned chair, wrapped in a fluffy pink robe (Velvette’s), your thighs still sore, hair a disaster, and sanity hanging by a very frayed thread. You’d barely survived a three-way sex marathon, and now Valentino was doing your nails. “Babe, hold still or I’ll smudge the glitter,” he muttered around his cigarette, squinting with terrifying concentration as he painted your pinky the exact shade of blood red. “I swear, you fidget more than Vox when the WiFi’s down.”

You gave him a dead-eyed stare.

“I’m an artist with exquisite taste and access to 5K worth of OPI demon polish.” Val said without looking up. 

Vel plopped onto the armrest beside them, shoving her phone in Valentino’s face. “OHHH oh oh—do this next! Look at the little rhinestone skulls!! They’d look so cute on her middle fingers when she flips off Vox!”

“I feel like I’m gonna die,” you muttered.

“Nope!” Velvet chirped. “You’re ours now, darling.”

Before you could protest, Vox strolled in like he owned the place (he did), shirtless and content, a steaming mug that said “Fuck Alastor” in one hand. “I’ve already handled the paperwork,” he announced cheerfully.

Everyone blinked.

“What paperwork?” you asked, already regretting it.

“For the future marriage, obviously,” Vox said, sipping his coffee. “Three-way binding. You, me, Val, and Vel. I had the property deeds transferred this morning. Congrats darling, you now own a penthouse here.”

You looked into the metaphorical camera like you were on the Office.

Valentino gently blew on your nails to dry them, surprisingly delicate for an overlord. “Maybe I’ll get your name tattooed over my heart. Or ass. Same thing.”

The door to the room swung open with a sudden force, and Charlie stepped in, her hair flowing, red eyes glowing, partial demon form showing. “WHERE–”

She stilled, her expression going from anger to shock as she took in the sight of you sitting in the chair, surrounded by the three Vees who were clearly treating you…not torture-y?

“Charlie!” You smiled wide, getting up and hugging her close. Charlie hugged back tightly, glad you were okay. The Vees frowned.

“What the hell is going on here?” Charlie stepped back a little to get a good look at you. “Are you alright?”

Your lips curled into a smile, “Oh, don’t mind them. They’re just... being themselves.” 

Charlie raised an eyebrow, but didn’t say anything. You knew she would ask as soon as you got back at the hotel. Charlie smiled at you, looping her arm around yours.“Come on. Let’s go home.”

Before you could take a single step, the Vees exploded into action. Velvette’s smile held a dangerous edge. “She belongs here with us, princess.”  

Vox was pushed off the wall with a sudden growl, his voice dipping into a deeper, more menacing tone as his left eye spiraled. “You really think you can come in here and walk out with her? Think again.”  

Val already had his gun out, his moth wings flaring wide.

Oh god, do they really think they can win against the princess of hell? You thought they were smarter than this. And you hadn’t gotten a chance to clarify shit.

You rolled your eyes and gave them a pointed look. “You guys can’t just calm the fuck down for once?” Charlie, still somewhat stunned but equally protective, tugged you behind her, giving the Vees a stern look. 

“Ah, ah, ah,” Vox said, wagging a finger lazily. “Not so fast, sweetheart. You lost the game.”

You blinked and slowly turned to him, arms crossed. “Excuse me?”

“You know the rules,” Vox continued, setting his mug down with theatrical care. “We win the game, you stay with us. Forever. And, well... baby, round three? You didn’t stand a chance.”

Velvette chuckled behind him, lounging on the couch like a smug panther. “Mmm. Sweetheart was screaming our names.”

Charlie looked like she realised it all now and didn’t like this one bit.

“Then let’s talk about the results, shall we?” you said, holding up one finger. “Round one? You all came embarrassingly fast.”

Valentino actually gasped, like someone has offended his entire family. “Excuse me?”

“Tell me I’m wrong.” You arched a brow. “We all came together. So I’m calling that round a tie.”

Vox's smirk faltered slightly. “Fine. Round one: tie. And round two?”

You held up another finger. “Round two? I won. Easily. Valentino was still recovering, Vel forgot her name, and you,” You pointed at Vox, “were close to a reboot. I could tell.”

“I was distracted!” Vox snapped.

“Point proven.”

Valentino whistled low. “Damn. She’s got receipts.”

“And round three,” You went on, “I’ll admit, yeah, you guys won. Barely. Because I was exhausted by that point and couldn’t feel my damn legs.”

Charlie looked increasingly like she wanted to be anywhere else right now.

“So!” You declared brightly. “One round tie, one round me, one round you. That makes it a... what, kids?” There was a long, tense pause.

“Tie,” Velvette muttered.

You beamed. “Correct! So technically, no one wins. Meaning you can’t hold me to the ‘stay with us forever’ clause. But I am feeling generous today…I give you six months a year.” The Vees all blinked.

“In the V-tower?” Vel asked cautiously.

You nodded. “With you maniacs. But the other six months? I stay at the Hazbin Hotel with Charlie. My sanity needs time to regenerate.”

Charlie hummed. “That sounds familiar.”

“Exactly.” You smiled sweetly. “Persephone-style. Half the year in V tower with you guys, the other half with Charlie and the slightly-less-insane people.”

“I am so done with all of you,” Charlie mumbled under her breath.

Valentino leaned forward, intrigued. “Do we at least get conjugal visits during the off-season?”

“No,” You replied instantly.

“Phone sex?”

“No.”

“E-projections?”

“Valentino.”

He sat back with a mock pout. “Fine.”

Vox rubbed his chin thoughtfully, then gave a slow, wicked grin. “You know what? I’ll allow it. Six months on, six months off.”

Charlie threw her arms in the air. “I am officially declaring this entire situation cursed.”

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Notes: Wow! Can't believe this fic has come to an end. Omg this was SO fun, you guys!! I hope you had just as much fun as I did! Thank you — every like, every comment, it seriously means the world and keeps me writing more.

For my next piece...stay tuned!

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Some bonus crack for your guys(◕⁠ᴗ⁠◕⁠✿⁠)

GZ!R: Yes, not the point — do you think our kids would be normal or like. . . Would they have like, laptops for heads?

Vox, staring at reader dumbfounded: . . . What? Why does that matter?

GZ!R, shrugging: I couldn't look at my kid with a straight face if he had an iPad head. I'm sorry, but I couldn't.

Vox: I'm going to bed now. I — I can't handle this right now.

Vox: Call me a boomer in bed again and we'll have issues.

GZ!R, unfazed: Would you rather I call you by your gamer tag?

Vox: . . .

GZ!R: Because suckmyplugs66 isn't. . . It's not giving the vibes you want it to, Voxy.

GZ!R: I kinda wanna touch an electric fence to see if they really work.

Vox, side glancing Valentino from across the room: They do

GZ!R, already pulling out their wallet: I'll give you $5 if we can go to the Doomsday District so I can push him into the fences.

Vox: No.

Vox: Don't be a bitch, make it $10.