howdy

yesterday i rolled a joint and immediately lost it and my only comfort has been imagining it traveling chef boyardee style down the stairs and across the walkways to a stoner in greater need than myself

When i used to work at Whole Foods i would make and freeze my sandwiches for the week but since frozen lettuce is an abomination and a whole head of lettuce is Way too much for a single broke college student who doesn't even really like salad that much, each lunch break i would go to the by-weight salad bar and carefully purchase one single small lettuce leaf. All of my coworkers mocked me relentlessly for it but it cost like $0.01 and half the time it was too light for the scale so they'd just shove it towards me like "Just take it, man." Through such cunning means i probably spent like a dollar total on lettuce in 2 years

just saying. we got a lot in common, the humble betta fish and I

The celebrity Ben & Jerry's ice cream flavors being some of the best ones is like the retail equivalent of having to go to a restaurant and order a rootin tootin yeehaw cowboy burger or something

Grand Old Boars can of course cast spells as a 17th level sorcerer

And the spell is always DESTRUCTION

is there any reason american rubbers are pink or are they just a little gayer than the rest of us

I asked my niece what her favourite song was and she said Lalala 🎵