what did u just said

Professionalism sucks I wanna put "😭😭" in my emails.

you eat me and i perfectly dodge all of your digestive enzymes and stomach acid and i sprint out your asshole fully intact

It looks the flag of the laziest team or someting......

Nervously, I pull from the tarot deck. It’s the Nine of Clocks. My fate is revealed to me: It’s my bedtime, and I gotta go to sleeps

Whoever invented getting out of bed can go to hell

wore my thigh high boots on a walk today and we had to take a path through some long grass and while everyone else was rolling their pants into their socks and putting on jackets to protect themselves from ticks i was standing there smug as hell in my thigh high leather boots.

a hoe never gets lyme disease