Credit to the anon who sent this to me years ago… Holly is part-time writer with writer's block. She moves house, and the antics of her new, mischievous neighbours (Gail and any combination of the rookies) inspires her to write again. The book inevitably becomes a bestseller. Gail and her roommates show up at a signing. Gail hasn't read the book but her roommates love it and really see themselves in it.
It had been Rachel’s idea really. A change of scenery was supposed to cure her writer’s block. So when a cabin on the lake became available she “just had to take it.” It was fate or whatever. Except Holly still hadn’t written a word and had been living there for a month already.
“I know Lucy, this isn’t working.”
The white cat rubbed against her legs as Holly closed her laptop and let out a frustrated sigh. Another day wasted. She pushed her glasses to the top of her head and rubbed at the bridge of her nose. She already had the start of a headache creeping in.
“How about a little fresh air, Luc?”
The isolation was supposed to be refreshing. A change of pace from the overcrowded city life of Toronto, but without Lucy, Holly was pretty sure she would’ve lost her mind.
“At least the view is nice”, she had to admit, as she watched the sun start to set over the lake. She loved the wraparound porch and the rustic feel of the old cabin. She also loved the simplicity. But the scenery had not been enough to inspire her. She needed something else…
Holly was startled out of her moping by the slamming of car doors.
“Last one in has to sleep on the floor!” A pixie-sized redhead shouted as she sprinted out of a jeep and headed straight towards the lake, shedding clothing as she ran.
Holly was surprised as a rather large group of guys and girls piled out of the jeep and another truck, dropping luggage and racing towards the water. All except for one blonde woman who seemed to be in no hurry at all as she strutted (yes, strutted) to the shoreline.
Holly couldn’t take her eyes off of her, the woman looked like she had stepped straight off a movie screen. Her hair platinum blonde, her skin pale, and even from the distance Holly could see the deep red stain of lipstick on her lips all seemed too perfect to have been human.
“It’s my cabin. You all are lucky I even invited you up here.”
“And I have a bedroom that belongs to me. You can sleep on the floor or in the car for all I care, or hitchhike back to the city.”
The redhead tried to splash her, but she was quicker than expected, considering the lack of running.
“Do that again and I will end you, you Disney princess.”
Holly laughed from her porch as she watched one of the taller guys try to sneak behind the blonde to toss her into the lake only to get flipped into the water himself.
“That’s what you get, Diaz. Anyone else feeling stupid?”
The challenge seemed to be accepted by the entire group as they ganged up on the blonde. She wasn’t able to fend them all off and ended up in the water with the whole lot. She pulled herself out and the way she stomped on the dock reminded Holly of Lucy getting wet.
Holly opened up her laptop and started typing.
Holly was surprised when she walked out to find an entire obstacle course created. She wasn’t sure where all of it came from but each team certainly had a fair share of hiding places.
She pushed her laptop to the side and watched as the two teams attacked each other with paintballs. They seemed to take it very seriously and tactically. She couldn’t exactly tell who was who but she thought she saw a flash of a blonde ponytail heading towards a large tower in the center. She was right and Holly couldn’t help but smile at the proud way the blonde held the stuffed camel over her head and let out a victory yell.
She could hear the group bickering about whether the toy was a camel or a giraffe. Holly sided with Gail’s impassioned declaration that the animal was a giraffe despite the evidence otherwise.
She pulled her laptop back to herself. Maybe there was something here.
“Dov!! Did you eat my cheesepuffs?”
“No,” Came the muffled reply and then heavy footsteps and slamming doors.
Holly watched the blonde show an impressive agility as she chased the skinny man out to the dock. She was clearly on a seek and destroy mission.
Lucy hopped up onto the rail but Holly couldn’t take her eyes off of her neighbors, well one neighbor in particular.
“I know, Lucy, I wouldn’t mess with her cheesepuffs either.”
Holly hunched over her computer, the words seemed to be filling the pages in no time at all whenever her blonde muse was around. But who was she to look a gift horse in the mouth? If inspiration wanted to strike when a gorgeous woman moved into the lake house near her with a group of hooligans, then she had to take advantage of it.
And if inspiration happened to spend a lot of time in a bikini, well she wasn’t one to judge.
“Lucy? Luc? Where are you, troublemaker?”
Holly had already searched the small cabin three times, she had left out treats, tried tuna, and everything else she could think of. But Lucy hadn’t shown up for breakfast and Holly was starting to worry when she heard a knock on her door.
She was stunned when her disgruntled muse was holding her even more digruntled feline.
“Is this demon cat yours?”
“Lucy! Oh thank god, where did you find her?”
“What? How?” Holly couldn’t help being a little jealous of her own cat who was wrapping herself around Holly’s legs now that she was home.
“I was wondering the same thing.”
“I’m so so sorry, She usually doesn’t wonder that far from the porch. How did you know she was mine?”
“I thought I had seen her out here with you. You’re new here.”
“I am. Holly, Holly Stewart.”
Holly waited for the usual follow-up question about what brought her to the lake. But the question never came. Instead the blonde sized her up and Holly felt a little warm under the scrutiny. She wished she had brushed her hair and put on a better bra if she had known she’d be getting such a gorgeous visitor.
“So Holly Stewart…are you a jock by any chance?”
She laughed, mostly at how random the question was.
“You’re wearing a Jays hat.”
“There’s also the flannel and the backpacks.”
“Are you implying something?”
“Me? No. But your wardrobe…”
Holly both hated and loved the smirk on the other woman’s face.
“Well I wouldn’t borrow anything from your wardrobe?”
“What’s wrong with my wardrobe?”
“Nothing, just not my style. Why are you looking for a jock?”
“The idiots I’m letting visit me are determined to play a game of softball and we need another player.”
“Another player? How many of you are there?”
“Okay, truth is I’m looking for someone to take my place.”
“I don’t really do sports.”
“But you like to win.” Holly remembered vividly the joy when the blonde won the giraffe, er camel.
“I do like to win but I also don’t like to embarrass myself.”
“I could help, you know, at least enough to not embarrass yourself.”
Seeming to weigh out her options, blue eyes gave Holly another once over.
“Meet me at the dock at noon.”
“It’s a date.” Holly internally cringed as soon as the words left her mouth. And even Lucy gave her a pathetic look.
“You’re going to have to do better than batting practice for a date. See you later Holly Stewart. Bye Lucifer.”
Holly hate to say goodbye but damn did she love to watch her go.
“Well Luc I want to be mad at you for scaring me but you are also my hero. So extra treats tonight.”
Batting practice didn’t quite go as expected as the bat went flying and Gail let out the girliest shriek that Holly had ever heard as soon as she took her first swing.
“I told you, I don’t do sports!” Gail shouted as she started to storm away.
Holly tried to hold in her giggles as she went after the infuriated woman.
“No, I told you I was going to embarrass myself.”
“It wasn’t that embarrassing.” Holly found herself on the receiving end of an infamously icy glare. “Okay it was…” the blonde started to stomp away again but Holly caught her by the arm. “Come on, something new won’t kill you. It almost killed me but that’s a risk I’m willing to take.I promised to teach you. Let me. Please? I’m a woman of my word.”
“Fine, but if you can’t, then you’re playing instead of me.”
Gail begrudgingly picked up the bat and headed back to the spot where they were practicing.
“First, we need to fix your stance. May I?”
As Holly assumed a position behind Gail, the blonde quipped, “No wonder you volunteered to teach me.”
“I’m a hands-on kind of coach.” But yes, in Holly’s gayest fantasies she imagined just this scenario. She may have even written about it in chapter 7 of her book.
“Okay so you want to square your hips so you have a good center of gravity.” Holly gently put her hands on the blondes waist and used her feet to spread her legs a bit more. “You want to have a little bend and carry your weight on your back foot as you turn.”
She helped Gail through a couple of swings before she reluctantly let go of her protege. She was already missing the warmth of her body but she had a game to teach and a ball to throw
“Choke up a little on the bat, and most importantly…Don’t let go.”
It took a few pitches, but Gail held onto the bat, and despite her protests took Holly’s advice. On the fourth pitch she finally connected and sent it sailing over Holly’s head.
“Oh my god, I did it. Did you see that? I hit a home run!”
“Probably would’ve been a double.” Another icy glare went her way and Holly changed her tune. “Definitely a home run!”
Holly had a perfect view of the game from her porch. She watched as Gail’s friends heckled her at the plate.
The thin, asthmatic looking cheesepuff thief she had heard them call Dov, seemed to be the most ruthless in mocking Gail.
He was also the one whose jaw nearly hit the ground when at her first time at the plate Gail sent a linedrive well past their outfield.
Holly smiled to herself when Gail rounded the bases and then looked over to where she was sitting and tipped her hat in her direction. She could see that wolfish smile even from the distance and felt her nerdy heart skip a beat.
Holly and Lucy returned from their trek to the nearest market to find a blonde visitor waiting on their porch.
“I was starting to wonder if you ever left this spot.”
“Lucy here was precariously low on catfood.”
“I thought the devil fed off of virgin sacrifices?”
“And tuna.” Holly shook the bag in her hand and Lucy perked up at the mention of her favorite can. “What brings you to my side of the lake?”
“Celebratory drinks.” Gail held up a bottle of tequila. “Please tell me you have a blender.”
“I have a blender and I think I still have ice.”
They headed inside and Holly set about putting away her groceries and retrieving the requested blender.
“Did you enjoy doing sports today?”
“Enjoy is a strong word.” Gail argued as she unceremoniously began snooping through Holly’s living space.
“An analysis of an autopsy. Do you really read this stuff?”
Gail simply nodded and went to the kitchen to make the margaritas. Despite Holly offering her glasses, Gail brought the blender out to the porch with them.
Gail pulled the other chair across the porch to sit closer and they enjoyed their drinks while watching the sun set over the lake.
After all the time Holly had watched the blonde’s shenanigans with her friends, she was a little surprised at how pensive she could be.
“Is that why you pick fights with Lucy?”
Gail ignored her and continued, “I'm very good at climbing trees and then the minute that I get up there I don't-I have no idea what to do. I want to get down but I don't know how to do that, so I create an emergency situation to get out of it."
“Ah. I used to be like that too. Turns out I didn’t like men.”
“I don’t Ike them either.”
Lucy looked over from where she had been cleaning herself to give Gail a dirty look before resuming her bath.
“If you hate people so much, why did you come over here, Gail?”
Holly wasn’t entirely sure what emboldened her to ask. Maybe it was the tequila. Maybe it was being out of her comfort zone. Maybe it was just her natural curiosity. Or her hopeful gay heart speaking before her mind could catch up.
“What’re you doing tomorrow night?”
Other than trying to finish the book that her editor was getting anxious for, now that Holly had sent her the first few chapters, “Not much why?”
“We’re heading back to the city Sunday morning and the heathens are very set on having a bonfire before we go. Do you want to come? You can be my plus one.”
It would’ve been impossible to miss even if Holly hadn’t been invited to the giant fire they had created next to the lake. But this group never seemed to be satisfied with anything less than pure chaos.
She tried to brush off the nervousness she felt. She wasn’t that gawky teenager going to a party with her first crush. She was a grown ass woman who had many (well at least multiple) relationships with other women and this wasn’t a date anyway. It was just hanging out with Gail and her friends next to a rather large fire. But as soon as she saw the blonde her heart betrayed her by pounding a mile a minute.
“You know it sounded familiar.”
Holly smirked. If she didn’t know any better she would think that Gail was nervous too. But they were quickly interrupted by the rest of the group.
“Hey Gail, who's your friend?”
After that it was a flurry of names and faces as Gail introduced her to the various people who supplied her with endless entertainment that summer. And alcohol. A lot of alcohol.
And at some point Holly found herself being pulled by Gail away from the group but still near the fire until it was just them.
“Sorry to subject you to the barbarians.”
“I like your friends. They seem nice.”
“I think you need a new prescription if what you saw was considered nice.”
“That’s all they do! And so upbeat.”
“Happy people are the worst.”
“Right?! I knew inviting you was the right choice.”
“You’re not a Disney princess or a girl guide.”
“Cause that would just be the worst.”
“It would be a deal breaker for sure.”
“You’re insane. You know that, right?”
But Gail just smiled at her and Holly was convinced the fire was playing tricks on her when it looked like Gail was looking at her lips. She wanted to kiss her. To bridge the gap between them that wasn’t more than a few inches anyway. But just as Holly was starting to lean a little closer a bucket of cold water rained down on them.
“Dov! I’m going to murder you!”
And then Gail was racing off to exact revenge and the opportunity was gone. It wasn’t long after that the night was winding down and Holly knew she should head back to her place.
“I’m sorry about that but I warned you they were heathens.”
“This was fun. Plus ones forever.” Holly offered as she bumped her shoulder into Gail’s.
It seemed like the blonde wanted to say something else but she didn’t and Holly made the short walk back to her house alone.
After a restless night’s sleep, Holly didn’t want to get out of bed the next morning. She heard the loud voices and the slamming doors. But watching Gail leave was too much. So she stayed in bed with Lucy and poured what she was feeling onto the screen in front of her
“It’s about a bunch of rookie cops who all work for the same division. There’s this one awesome group of friends who are always getting into a bunch of messy situations and are goofing around but also taking care of each other and the city. My favorite is the redhead obviously.” Chloe chattered as they entered the bookstore.
Andy was quick to chime in, “Yeah, well my favorite is Alexandria, she seems so noble. The way the author writes the book, it just really makes you see yourself in the story.”
“Did you read it yet, Gail?” Chloe was practically vibrating with excitement.
Gail rolled her eyes, “I already told you Chipmunk that I’m not joining your stupid book club, so no I didn’t read it.”
“Traci promised me dinner after.”
“Yep, the new sushi place down the street. If I am standing in this long line then you can bet your ass that I am being fed. Also why is this line so long? Who wrote this thing anyway?”
“That’s part of the fun, it’s a mystery. The author used a pseudonym and didn’t put a picture in the jacket.” Chloe explained.
“Well there is one, technically, but it’s of a white cat in a tree. I don’t think a cat wrote it.” Andy joked.
“Yeah, that’s why we wanted to come, so we could finally see who the author is.” Traci added.
A white cat? “Let me see that.” Gail grabbed the book and started to flip through it.
Holly wasn’t sure what she was expecting, but she certainly didn’t expect such a crowd over something she wrote. As she sat at the table signing copy after copy, it was almost overwhelming. She was at the point where was barely looking up and her editor just kept handing another book.
“Hey, you’re Gail’s friend from the lake!”
Holly’s head shot up at the mention of Gail and the familiar voice. Sure enough she was face to face with three of Gail’s friends. All holding a copy of her book. Which meant they read it. Fuck!
“Oh my god I can’t believe you wrote this. And I can’t believe we actually know the mystery writer. This is so cool. Your book is amazing.”
“Thanks, thank you. I appreciate it.” As Holly was signing the copies she glanced around but there was no platinum blonde in sight.
“Oh.” Holly’s disappointment must’ve shown.
“But I bet if she had known you wrote this, she totally would’ve stayed.”
Holly doubted that very much, but she forced a smile as they asked to take a picture with her. And just like that they were gone and the line kept moving. But the sinking feeling never left.
After the signing, Holly packed up Lucy and headed out to the lake house. She told her editor it was because she needed to finish packing now that her rental was up and the book tour was about to start. But if she was being honest that wasn’t the only reason. She knew that Gail had no reason to be out there at this time. But it didn’t stop her from hoping.
She spent the entire drive thinking of what she would say if the blonde did happen to show up. If it played out like a romcom and the woman that she had fallen for was sitting on her porch waiting to confront her about secretly writing a book about her. A love story really. Holly had dedicated the book to all “the cats who get stuck in trees and the people who help them back down.” Still she had never actually expected Gail or her friends to read it. But they had, and now Holly had to make things right.
She was a writer after all. So the words would come naturally of course. She’d say just the right thing at the right moment and Gail would understand that the book was…a mistake. God, she never should’ve written it, let alone published it and especially not without telling Gail first that that’s what she was doing out at the lake.
“I’m an idiot, Luc. A certifiable idiot.”
“Thanks for the support.”
As Holly pulled into her driveway she could see a small light on her porch and boots on her railing. She walked up to find her dream girl clad in leather and any words she had prepared left her.
But she didn’t need to speak because as soon as she stepped out of the car and towards the steps, Gail greeted her with…
“I’m like a cat, Hailey. I’m really good at climbing trees…Hmm why does that sound so familiar?”
“Gail, I am so sorry. I never meant for you to find out like this.”
“That you wrote a book about me and my idiot friends? Why didn’t you tell me that’s what you were doing all that time that you were spying on us?”
“I wasn’t spying and I wanted to tell you but I didn’t know how to contact you, you weren’t at the lake and I didn’t know your last name, and I honestly never thought you’d read it or that it was going to get published. It all happened so fast. I never thought I’d write anything. When I first got here there was nothing but blank pages, and then you moved in and suddenly the words weren’t a struggle anymore. Every time I saw you I was inspired. You were the only thing that helped me get over my block and then I sent some pages to my editor who loved it and wanted more. And then you showed up holding Lucy and then I was helping you learn to bat and you were making margaritas and asking me to be your plus one and I didn’t know that I’d finish it or it would get published but that’s no excuse because I should’ve told because we tell each other things and that’s what so great about us but I completely ruined it. I’m sor-“
And Holly’s torrent of barely sensical words were cut off by the press of Gail’s lips.
“Sorry you just-you just had to stop talking.”
“I won’t say another word.”
Holly was prepared not to take another breath so long as it meant Gail didn’t let her go. And she was rewarded by another more tentative kiss.
When they finally broke apart, Holly was breathless and her heart was pounding but she still had a nagging feeling of guilt.”
“I am really sorry, Gail.”
“You’re sorry that I inspired a really successful book that is going to make you filthy rich? Do I get royalties? Also is this sex scene in chapter 12 also based on your experiences or pure imagination?”
“More like wishful thinking.”
