How Did It Come To This?

ORDINARY PEOPLE: drive cars while not wearing fedoras

CREATIVE PEOPLE: fly while wearing fedoras

ORDINARY PEOPLE: watch that newfandangled Tele Vision Programing like BRAINLESS SHEEPLE DRONES

CREATIVE PEOPLE: read BOOKS, REMEMBER THOSE, MILLENIALS??? Also while wearing their fedora indoors. It just never comes off I guess. Okay.

ORDINARY PEOPLE: sad that their mean asshole sexy boss isn’t a witch and hogs all the glasses

CREATIVE PEOPLE: how the tables have turned

ORDINARY PEOPLE WITH THE SAME COPY PASTED FACE BY THE WAY: WASTE THEIR LIVES WITH BRAIN ROTTING “VIDEO” “GAMES” >:( >:( >:(

Scrunched up in a London hotel armchair, Owen is here to promote his third single, “I Am What I Am”, along with a UK tour starting in October. Still pubescently cute and coquettish, the clean-cut image sticks despite the obvious shift in style. “I’m trying to be more honest, more myself in terms of image. It’s kind of difficult,” he laughs. “In Take That you used to be given a selection of clothes to choose from. Now you’ve got to think, ‘What do I want to wear?’” Owen’s opted for the lo-fi look, woolly top and trainers. Gone are the highlighted locks. His hair is longer and browner - almost, but not quite, dishevelled. 

“I don’t really see myself as having a clean cut image”, says Owen, smiling coyly. The dimples broaden and the blue-green, limpid eyes widen slightly. You could have fooled me. But no. Pop’s Mr Whiter-than-White is just like the rest of us. “I see myself as quite a normal lad. I smoke. I drink but I don’t do drugs. Drugs scare me. I see them as hiding from real life.” Yet, they often seem to go hand in hand with the sort of pop music that is the antithesis of Take That; the sort of pop music that Owen would probably like to make. Doesn’t that tempt him to experiment a bit? “Maybe some people are musically inspired by them [drugs], but it’s a shame. I feel you can do without." 

Maybe Owen doesn’t need to anyway - he seems quite spacey enough as it is. After talking about song-writing, he says, apropos of nothing, "Sometimes, I feel I could send myself mad. Other times, I wish I was mad. My head won’t stop,” he lets out a Mancunian chuckle. To counter his hyperactive imagination he relaxes through meditation - something he learned from Lulu. “I’m not meditating as much as I did when I made Green Man,” he says, “which is probably why I’m a little more nervous and paranoid.” Not that you’d notice; when he’s not being too kooky, he radiates inner harmony and togetherness.

And don’t even get me started on

One of his real achievements to date was during his European tour - for him success can be measured by the pitch of audience response. “When I first went on stage I got bombarded with teddies and got screamed at. Then I asked them to stop throwing teddies and screaming. And by the end,” he gazes up and continues ever so solemnly, “there were no more teddies. There were no more screams… It was more of a roar.” So girls, if you really want to do Owen a favour, leave the teddies at home next time and bring your lighters instead.

“Unaware but underlined I figured out this story. It wasn’t good.”

“But in the corner of my mind I celebrated glory. But that was not to be.”

“In the twist of separation you excelled at being free.”

“Can’t you find a little room inside for me.”

“Ladies and Gentlemen, Mark Owen!!!”

“Whenever I’m wrong just tell me the song and I’ll sing it. You’ll be right and understood.”

  “And we’ll be together, this time is forever. We’ll be fighting and forever we will be.”

“So complete in our love. We will never be uncovered again.”