Well, were you really attracted to them or did you really have envy? It's safe to say it's the latter.
Well, mostly the latter. I was not really too much into bikini babes unless they had a gorgeous figure and a sexy swimsuit. I do admit that I found some girls very hot and attractive, and I still do. The rest, though? It was more in the sense of "Ugh, I feel so off seeing her. Why do I imagine myself as her?" as opposed to "Damn! She's sexy! I wish I was next to her!". Flashbacks to the past can be either good or bad. In this case, it's more on the good since I feel relieved that I don't need to hide my goals anymore.
I was always envious and jealous of the girls going up and beyond and it just gets stronger each day.















