Meditation: Myths vs reality, and One Method!
NO MOVING!
You donât have to stay completely still to meditate! Wiggling is often fairly essential to getting comfy, and if a position is getting uncomfortable after a while, of course youâll want to move! Allow yourself little twitches and involuntary movements, and if youâre experiencing discomfort, of course move! Discomfort distracts from your meditation more than making a minor adjustment to get comfortable! Your goal is to be comfortable enough that youâre able to let go of your physical senses, NOT to stay still for ages!
NO THINKING!
Youâre totally allowed to have thoughts! If you have a thought, youâre not âmeditating wrongâ! The real skill comes with redirecting your consiousness away from thoughts after acknowledging them. Feel free to acknowledge your thought, greet it, and recognize it! Itâs a thing! But then tell that thought that youâll come back to it later, and gently send it on its way. Instead of focusing on the things floating in our stream of consiousness, we want to learn more about the stream itself!
SPIRITUAL MEDITATION ONLY!
Meditation is incredibly useful for many things! And many of those things have nothing to do with spirituality or magic or religion! Meditation helps us learn more about ourselves and how our brains work. It teaches us to relax and free ourselves from the vice grip reality and its stressors have on us. Through meditation, we can release unhelpful thoughts, and stress in the body and mind. You donât have to be a witch, monk, or celestial being to meditate!
IF YOU DONâT HAVE A MAGICAL, TRANSCENDING EXPERIENCE, YOUâRE DOING SOMETHING WRONG!
Again, meditation is more than transcending and magic! If you learn anything about yourself, find peace, de stress, ease discomfort, or really get any sort of benefit at all, youâre doing it right! It takes time to easily shift into meditative states, and even more time to easily get into trance/vision states, so not getting there immediately doesnât mean youâre a failure! NEVER getting there doesnât mean youâre a failure! So long as youâre improving your state of mind or body in some way, you win!
MEDITATION IS A RITUAL!
Uh, no. Meditation can take place in a temple, with incense and candles and all that fancy stuff, sure⌠But it can also take place in your pajamas while chillinâ in bed. Or in the back seat on a long, boring road trip. Or in a hot tub. Or on the bus. All you need to meditate is you, your brain, and a want to meditate. You CAN do a ritual before/after/during meditation if you like, but itâs by no means required!
SIT UP, YOU MUST BE IN THE FANCY LOTUS POSITION!
You donât need to make a leg pretzel to meditate. You can meditate laying down (if you feel you wonât fall asleep), you can be sprawled out in a beanbag, you can be lounging in a recliner⌠Whatever you want! Again; getting comfortable enough to let go of your senses is the goal. If a sitting, fancy position isnât comfy for you, donât do it!
WHATâS YOUR MANTRA?
Having a mantra or affirmation to repeat is helpful to some, but itâs not for others. You donât have to have a mantra, and you certainly donât have to use it out loud!
BEADS, BALLS, SHAPES, OH MY!
You donât need mala beads to meditate! Mala beads or prayer beads are used to keep track of how many times youâve said your mantra or prayer, and are more for specific eastern religions. You donât need those metal ringy balls, though they can be helpful to have a feeling and motion and weight to focus on. Really, all of these things help to provide a focal point. Any skin-safe stone can provide weight or sensation to focus on, or you can even use a stim (cube, spinner, texture, chew, etc) to help. If youâre a fidgeter, or need stim to relax, stim away! But none of these things are required.
IF ITâS NOT EFFORTLESS, YOU CANâT MEDITATE!
If you have a hard time meditating, problem solve! What was hard about it? Why? How can you improve the situation for your next try? Meditation isnât instant, and itâs not effortless and easy for everyone! Take your time, move at your own pace, and find what works best for you.
HOW TO: (this is just one method, the one I use!)
1. Get comfy! If youâre able to change into comfy clothes, do it. If youâre able to get comfortable in bed, or a favorite chair, do it. Of course, things donât always go our way, and sometimes weâre stuck with less than desirable situations, but do your best with what you have!
2. Get EXTRA comfy and relax. Slowly start relaxing your body. Wiggle around and get your torso and central body comfy, then wiggle and get your shoulders comfy, and then your hips, and then your legs and arms, and then your head, and then your hands and feet. Unclench your jaw, let yourself breathe slowly and comfortably (if youâre like me, counting doesnât help; just get into a comfy, natural breathing pattern.)
3. REALLY relax. Go back through your body, head to toes, toes to head, bit by bit, and relax your muscles and body as much as possible. If youâre struggling, tense, hold, and then slowly relax each part, bit by bit. Let go of your physical sensation. Work to not feel your body at all. Breathe naturally, and slowly, slowly let your body fade away on its own.
4. Inward we go! Breathe naturally and slowly turn your mind inward, and watch your stream of consiousness. A thought may float along, and thatâs okay! You can acknowledge it. Say hello to your thought! But then tell it youâll focus on it later, and let it go. Gently free it from your focus, and let it float away. Do this again and again until you no longer really need to try on it. Once youâre to the point you can watch your thoughts float by without touching them⌠Congrats! Youâve reached a meditative state!
5. If you struggle to let your thoughts go, or find yourself worrying you wonât be able to think on it later, or youâll forget, itâs okay. Itâs natural! Instead of stopping and moving your body to pick up a pen and paper to write things down, consider getting a recording device of some sort, and simply give your thought a few keywords out loud, to remind you later, before letting it go. You can keep your focus internal, and just dictate absently if you need to!
A special thanks to @takemetotheastral for giving me the motivation to finally make this post!
All this time, Iâve been thinking I canât meditate because I canât get comfortable sitting up or staying still too long because of my chronic pain. It turns out I meditate just fine lying on my bed and just trying to make the inside of my head into a quiet place once I find that one ellusive comfy position.
^^^ exactly! So many folks, especially those with chronic pain, hyperactivity, or disability feel totally unable to meditate because of misinformation! But meditation is open to everyone, and there are no real rules!























