Solus Vivit

Dorian paused, truly considering.  He did already know most of it.  Perhaps it wasn’t necessary to insist on more so early on.  “I suppose that will do,” he replied.  “Unless elaboration would please you.  Then by all means, continue.  Otherwise…”  And here he gave a pointed pause, looking the vampire over.  It may have only been last night for Toby… but it had been far too long for Dorian.  Why not enjoy himself while he could… while this lasted?  Because who knew when he might be jolted back to the present… to his captivity and solitude.  “Well, I’m sure we could both think of more active pursuits that would amuse us both.”

Of course, there was always the possibility that this wasn’t HIS Toby.  That he was merely being toyed with again.  Dorian frowned at that thought… remembering how he’d felt after being tricked into sex the last time.  He sat back up in the bed, still frowning.  How could he know?  Was there any way to be sure this wasn’t all some game that Lucifer had devised for him?  If so, better to have it out now, surely?  “If this is a game, I want it to stop,” he said, voice both soft and harsh.  “Toy with me any other way you’d like, but not like this.  Not using him.  Please…”

That last word had a ragged sound to it that Dorian hated.  Wished he could take back.  But it was too late now.  If he looked up would he see that sly, uncharacteristic smirk on Toby’s face?  Fear (and hope) kept his gaze focused on the brocade curtains which separated the bedroom from the main living area instead.  After all, the longer he kept himself from looking, the longer he could believe this was real rather than some elaborate illusion.

The total reversal in Dorian’s attitude surprised and confused Tobias but he didn’t let it show - not yet.  Instead he grinned and said, “If I’d known you were going to be this high maintenance, Dorian, I might’ve thought twice about inviting you into my bed.”

With a soft groan he stretched and shifted to face the other immortal, using one elbow to prop himself up.  “Still… it was rather enjoyable.  Or I thought so, at any rate.”  He looked Dorian up and down.  “It would be a shame to miss out on more…”

So… he had his answer.  Unless he was being lied to, Toby remembered nothing.  They’d only just met in his eyes.  Their time together had yet to happen.  Dorian realized he now had a choice.  He could question it… or accept it.  Stranger things HAD happened.  Was some sort of bizarre time travel really so hard to believe?  And maybe… maybe this time things could be different.  Maybe, now that he knew what was coming, he could convince Toby not to leave.

And so what if it was all a game?  Would it matter?  Deep down, Dorian knew the answer was yes, but it was a risk he had to take.  Pushing the vampire away wasn’t something he thought he could do… not for a second time.  Even now, he still remembered the look on the other’s face down it that cell - how broken Toby had seemed in that moment.  Not that he would look the same this time - they were practical strangers now.  But Dorian intended to change that.  To change it all.

“Mmm…” he hummed, the sound both light-hearted and thoughtful.  “That’ll do, I suppose.  Although…”  His mind flashed to Ivor, remembering what the other vampire had tried to do to them.  To him.  Perhaps he could take care of that without Toby ever knowing Ivor still existed.  One more problem solved before it came between them.  “I wouldn’t be opposed to hearing more about your life… about how you became what you are…?”

This wasn’t at all how Tobias had imagined their first ‘morning after’ going.  Not that he minded actually talking with Dorian, but for some reason, he’d expected that sort of familiarity later rather than sooner.  “Mmm… if you’d like.  It’s actually a rather dull sort of story.”  Toby shifted a little, settling into the bed cushions… and shifting closer to Dorian in the process, fingers moving lazily over the other’s skin.

“I was a sheltered, but privileged teenager who didn’t like being told what to do.  Eventually I found myself some place I shouldn’t have been, and there was an accident.  A man I’d befriended turned out to be… more than a man.  He gave me a choice… and I took it.  The next night he was gone.  I never saw him again.  After that, I had to learn everything about what I was on my own.”

Dorian knew that look Toby was giving him.  Remembered it.  He wanted to forget what he remembered; to pretend that it had all been a bad dream and that reality was here and now - with Toby looking at him like that.  He wanted to quip back with a, ‘What’s the matter, I thought you liked it rough?’ But he couldn’t.  He couldn’t forget.  He couldn’t pretend.  And he couldn’t make his mouth work the way he wanted it too.  Instead, all Dorian did was swallow as Toby kept talking.

As the vampire tried to coax him back into the bed, Dorian’s eyes flitted around the curtained room, still remembering.  This… wasn’t right either.  They were in Toby’s bed… the converted church he’d lived in back in the 90′s.  This was a place from their past, not their present.  His eyes fell back onto his one-time lover.  God… he was beautiful.  Always had been.  But this wasn’t Toby.  Not anymore.  Lucifer had seen to that - had tricked them both so perfectly.

Lucifer.

Was that who he was talking to now?  In Toby’s guise?  Something in Dorian’s chest seemed to squeeze at him, and his eyes stung.  He’d done this.  He hadn’t understood… or hadn’t thought to question.  He’d wrapped Toby up like a present and handed him to Lucifer on a  silver platter.  Could he still fix this?  Was there a way?  Or were these the images his dying mind had decided to offer him?  That would be rather appropriate.  After all, when had he ever been happier than here, with Toby?  Before the nightmare that had become his life after the vampire’s death… his first death.

Making a decision, Dorian moved back to the bed and slid beneath the covers, pulling Toby close.  “No… no pressing plans.  But I do want to talk.  Toby, I… I need to know what you remember?  Before this.  Before…”  He didn’t know exactly how to say it.  ‘Hey, Toby, do you remember being a deranged human doctor who wanted to cut out my brain?’  Yeah - that wouldn’t work.   And what if this wasn’t Toby, but still Lucifer?  Then what?  And why were they suddenly back in time?  How had THAT happened?  The pieces he needed to answer these questions were all there… inside his head… he was sure of it.  He just couldn’t see how they fit together yet.

Toby was glad when Dorian got back into the bed, but his brow creased in confusion at the question.  “If you’re going to tell me you don’t recall anything about last night, then I’m losing my touch.”  He’d known Dorian for barely any time at all, but there was a sense of unease that surrounded the other man that hadn’t been there the night previous - Toby could practically smell it.

With a sigh of mild frustration, the vampire wrapped his arms around his new lover.  “I remember seeing you again at the party… inviting you home… introducing you to my ex…”  Toby smirked at that a little.  Although Dorian didn’t realize it, the woman had more than deserved her fate, and he’d been glad to finally be rid of her.  “Mmm… and then you let me feed on you - delicious, by the way.  Makes me wonder how the rest of you tastes.”  Another smirk, more lascivious this time.  “Beyond that… I’m not certain what it is you’re wanting me to remember.  Before we met?  Before I was turned?  You’ll have to be more specific.”

@sinnihte

Dorian came awake slowly.  He felt warm, comfortable, and so very at peace.  The bed beneath him was soft and the sheets felt expensive.  He gave a soft, pleasurable hum of contentment - which choked itself off abruptly as his last memory before unconsciousness smacked back into his head with the force of a wrecking ball.  He’d been imprisoned!  In an institution!  Accused of being someone he wasn’t!  They’d been about to…!  To what?  Kill him?!  He couldn’t be killed.  But then… what was this?!  Where was he?  

Cautiously, the immortal opened his eyes and looked around.  Faint moonlight streamed through several stained glass windows, falling in a sort of semi circle onto the bed.  Everything was raised slightly on a dais and surrounded on one side by heavy velvet curtains which partitioned it off from the rest of the room.  A room he’d last seen in the early 90s!

Next to him a body shifted, and Dorian turned to find himself staring down onto the sleeping, moonlit form of… “Toby…?”  The word came out soft and strangled.  But this was… all of it was wrong!  How could he be here?!  How could Toby…?!  With a strangled sound, Dorian slid out of the bed, continuing to stare in confused horror at the sleeping vampire. His mind was reeling, trying to make sense of something that made ABSOLUTELY no sense.

Waking up after the ‘procedure’ tied down to his bed in the psychiatric hospital would’ve at least made some sense.  Not waking up at all… well, he wouldn’t have been around to have to worry about it.  But this…?  What WAS this?!  Finally finding his voice, Dorian stood there, wearing nothing, and hissed, “Wake up!  I don’t know what you’ve done or how you’ve done it but it ends now!  WAKE. UP!”  Then he grabbed up his pillow and tossed it at Toby’s head.  Hard.  

The last thing Toby was expecting after a night of what he could only deem to be incredible sex, was to get a hard smack to the face as a wake-up call.  He let out a yelp, mostly muffled by the pillow still over his face, and then knocked the cushion aside to glare up at his (apparently) fuming lover.  “What the hell, Dorian?!” he growled, reaching to chuck the pillow back at him... but then pausing to admire the other’s naked form instead.  “If that’s your idea of foreplay, were going to have to have a talk.”

Tobias smirked, gazing appreciatively at the other man.  Dorian Gray.  THE Dorian Gray.  When the vampire had first realized the truth, he’d barely been able to believe it.  He’d planned for all of this so very carefully.  It’d been fun - working to properly ensnare the other man - making Dorian want him.  And after last night, Toby knew they were going to be good together.  Better than good.  He’d found his match.  A match he hadn’t been sure existed after so many centuries.

                            「 m y  d a r l i n g 」

                   could you ever really love                

dont touch what is mine 

dont flirt with what is mine 

dont try anything with what is mine 

because i will find you and i will murder you.