[content: MDNI, crack smųt, a very unserious piece of work, piv, hair pulling, use of aphrodisiacs, sukuna’s sour but then he’s sweet]

Never in your life have you been so horny it hurt.

“Kuna, please—harder,” you cry out.

“I’m going as hard as I fucking can, you little slut,” he snaps, each thrust matching every harsh word that gets spat through his teeth. “THIS IS WHY YOU DON’T EAT RANDOM. CHOCOLATE. ON. THE. COUNTER.”

“I’m sorry! Fuck!! I didn’t know!”

“There was a note saying DON’T eat it—you just didn’t give a shit because you’re a thief and a glutton. A liar now, too,” he continues to scold you over the chocolate bar he was going to give to Jin so he’d stop groveling over his ex. It’s been 6 fucking months, he’s tired of having to listen to him go on and on about Kaori. Enough is enough—he needs to go out and sleep with someone.

And now Jin’s never going to shut up. Sukuna doesn’t even want to look at you right now—let alone reward your behavior with dick.

“And now you’re cryin’ like it’s my fuckin’ fault.” It’s him who should be crying right now. “It’s simple: Leave my fucking snacks alone. I always get multiples of each so you’d keep your grubby little hands off them. Why can’t you just be normal and go in my wallet?? Fuck—Arch that back some more.” He cracks his palm over your ass. “Yeah, hike it up nice and high.”

“I can’t!” It feels like it’s about to break with all the weight he’s putting on it! Both of his hands pinning you down, burying every last inch of his cock inside of you.

He scoffs, nudging for you to close your thighs, then planting his knees right next to yours so they stay that way. “Do you want to cum?”

satoru loved hearing himself talk. which was unfortunate for you. because once he started talking, he never seemed to stop.

today’s topic happened to be something about a movie he had watched yesterday. you had stopped paying attention five minutes ago.

“and then the guy looks at him and actually-“ 

you leaned over and kissed his cheek. satoru paused. “…anyway,” he continued. “then he was like-”

another kiss. this time a little closer to the corner of his mouth. he blinked. “are you listening?”

you nodded. “mhm.”

“good.” he continued. “so then-“

kiss.

his sentence died immediately. you tried not to smile. “what was that for?” he asks, pouty.

you shrugged. “wanted to.”

satoru stared at you for a second before continuing. “right. as i was saying-“

kiss.

“hey.”

kiss.

“seriously.”

kiss.

you could see him fighting back a smile.

“you know,” he says, trying to sound annoyed, “most wives let their husbands finish speaking.”

you hummed. “i’m not most wives.” 

he rolled his eyes. “obviously.”

satoru tried one last time. “so the movie ends and-“

you grabbed his face and kissed the tip of his nose. silence. he stared at you. you stared back.

“…forgot what i was talking about.”

you smiled. “finally.”

“don’t sound so happy.”

he wrapped an arm around your waist and pulled you into his lap. “you did that on purpose.”

“did what?”

“made me forget.”

you smiled innocently. “i have no idea what you’re talking about.”

satoru narrowed his eyes. then immediately kissed your cheek.

once. twice. three times.

until you were laughing and trying to push him away. “okay, okay!”

“no,” he said, grinning against your skin. “i wasn’t finished talking.”

“you literally forgot.”

“details.”

he kissed your forehead. then your cheek. then the corner of your mouth.

“will you ever let me talk?” he asks.

you kiss him to shut him up, wrapping your hands around his neck. his arms wrap around your waist, pulling you in closer. 

“okay i would actually rather kiss you than talk.” he smiles and pecks your lips.

you grin and smush his cheeks. “cuteness aggression….”

Rocky chose a hand to match Grace's scar!

a visitor on the biodome!!

satoru loved teasing you. it was something he enjoyed doing the most. whether it was stealing food from your plate, poking your cheek nonstop, when you tried to focus, or saying the most ridiculous things in public just to watch you get red from embarrassment.

he lived for your reactions. and tonight was no different.

"you know," satoru started, resting his chin in his hand, "i think the waitress likes me."

you didn't even look up from the menu.

"mhm."

"i'm serious." he pouts childishly.

"of course you are."

"she smiled at me." he says, grinning.

"she's a waitress, satoru. that's her job." you say, getting kind of irritated at his words.

he clicked his tongue. "wow. someone's jealous."

finally, you looked up. "satoru."

his grin widened. there it is. the reaction he wanted. a few minutes later, the waitress approached your table.

"are you ready to order?" she asks and smiles at you, then satoru.

you nodded and told her your order. then the waitress turned to satoru. before he could say anything, you casually looked over and said-

"my husband will have the same."

satoru choked on the water he was drinking. the waitress nodded and walked away.

silence.

satoru didn't move. he simply stared at you. his ears turning red, and his cheeks even redder. his smile, usually so effortless, twitched into something much softer.

you tried to hide your own smile. "you okay, toru?"

"you-..," the words died in his throat but he spoke anyway, "you can't just call me that and expect me to be okay."

you grin at that. "thought you liked getting reactions out of me."

he lets out a quiet groan, dropping his head back. "i deserved that..."

you hum. "you've been teasing me and whatnot nonstop lately." you say, defending yourself.

he looks away. "i know.." he says, ashamed.

"telling me the waitress likes you?"

he winced.

"calling me jealous?"

he looks guilty, a frown showing up on his pretty face.

"it's only fair for me to tease you a bit too."

"by calling me your husband?"

"it worked, didn't it?"

"...a little too well." he looks at you. "i'm sorry, i didn't mean to keep pushing."

"it's okay, just maybe only focus on teasing, not making me jealous." you say, taking his hand in yours.

"whatever you say, wife."