low res joke farm

Jango Fett's parenting may be a hotly debated topic but bringing his ten year old son to the best seat of the space colosseum to watch a bunch of wild animals disembowel political prisoners was pretty fucking funny

@rayshippouuchiha

Knight shaking blood off from war like a dog shaking off bathwater

got fired from being the entertainer at a bachelor party for twisting the groom-to-be's dick into a poodle shape

i know i’ve talked about this before but thomas overbury is such a quintessentially stuart figure to me. his life is tragic and operatic, a grand story of devotion in corruption as he, as the reserved voice of reason, guides and bears up his passionate, charismatic friend and possible lover into the heart of the court and king; and then, when his friend has the love of the king and even that is not enough, he betrays overbury utterly in order to get more. even in the face of all this, even when his friend’s wife assassinates him with the king’s tacit consent, he stays steadfast for his friend. it’s poetic, it’s allegorical, it’s the kind of thing the jacobean stage eats right up. but how was he assassinated, you say? what swashbuckling cloak and dagger method did they use? well, they put sulfuric acid into his syphilis treatment enema, of course

in a way a spiritual couplet with villiers staying by king james’s bedside to the very end, as the king died of a “violent” attack of dysentery

speaking of hedging, one criticism i always hate that's often levelled against people doing media criticism or analysis is variations on "oh they think all their opinions are correct" yeah i'd hope so--don't understand why someone would hold an opinion they think is wrong! i hate the culture of endlessly qualifying everything you say to mollify an interlocutor who feels like your strongly held opinion is an imposition on their free will and i think nobody ought to bend to it. make your criticisms and points with your fucking chest. if you think you need my permission to disagree with me then you will die my thrall and be buried in my tomb

I think it's really funny that reading the discworld witch books (at least the ones that are Weatherwax+Ogg+Magrat), Granny immediately seems like the scariest one by far. She seems like a terrifying force of nature accompanied by a jovial old grandma and an insecure young woman. But as the series progress, the times when Granny holds back and Nanny and Magrat jovially engage in brutal physical violence add up. Now I'm not saying you *shouldn't* be scared of Granny, I'm just saying that she has a rather strong conscience in her way, whereas Magrat and Nanny will both sucker punch you, kick you between the legs and happily step over your groaning body. Granny is to be feared, but Nanny doesn't fight fair and Magrat will kill a motherfucker. Terry Pratchett really knew how to write female characters.

When you meet Edward Elric he gives off the impression that he's the short-tempered hot-headed "violence is the answer to all life's questions" kind of protagonist, and it's in fact incredible character craft that he's actually the character who ends the series with a negative-3 kill count.

God's worst soldier Edward Elric. Showed up as the youngest member of the Amestrian army, took millions of dollars from them, never followed a single order, helped dismantle their fascist regime, left with a lower kill count than he arrived with, then fucked off to go be a house-husband. Character of all time.