Stray Doodles

“I’m just a little blue tiefling” More sets from my photoshoot I did the other day. I’m so happy with how the makeup looked <3 

Costume by me Photo/Edit by me

ft. the human kids

Jane: On my first day here they said to me, ‘Oh Jane, are you a hard worker?’ It’s been 36 minutes since then, and I’ve already been promoted to manager 8 times.

Rose: I put stock on tables. When someone messes up my display, I go into the back room, scream loudly, do ten jumping jacks, and then come back and fix it.

Jake: When youre as pretty as i am, nobody cares if you dont know how to read!

John: i drive a segway. they call me ‘part blart mart cart’ but i laugh it off. i don’t mind this job! anything’s better than going back to prison!

Roxy: customers r always rude to me. ‘how old r u? where are ur parents? why did u sneeze in my shopping bag?’ my coping mechanism is rigging the intercom to play ‘karkalicious’ for eight hours straight

Jade: i always come half an hour early and bring everyone coffee! it gives them a false sense of security and makes them think im a hard worker. that way nobody questions it when i disappear for my entire shift to play candy crush in the bathroom. im on level 612

Dirk: I don’t like talking to the customers. Or my coworkers, or people in general. Whenever someone asks me for assistance, I tell them, 'Would you excuse me? I cut my foot before, and my shoe is rapidly filling with blood.’

like even sitting in an office for eight hours a day isn’t particularly pleasant (or healthy, as we are beginning to see) but when we’re talking about doing *actual work* for that same amount time it gets pretty fucking brutal

doing literally *anything* (even leisure activities) for eight hours straight tends to be less than enjoyable but when we’re talking about things like construction, landscaping, factory work, and hell, even foodservice and retail, eight hours is a fucking ETERNITY