Shouting Mayday

Lol, and it’s also narrated in the calmest, quietest voice like you’re watching a golf tournament but the stakes are your beloved crab-son’s life

When something tragic happens, tumblr is the only social platform you can escape to. The whole world could be in shambles and y’all are shitposting and reblogging pictures of tiramisu as usual.

If he's paying for stuff in vibes, does that mean he might end up paying with a... vibe cheque...?

i will shoot you on sight

Crabs deserve voting rights too I think

how will they tap the screen with claws

You're so ignorant it's not even funny

whose ignorant now you stupid dead bitch

i dreamt i held your hand and i didn’t want to wake up from that

ultimately i think we all want someone who will tenderly wipe the blood off our face