aur naur?

Violet was not particularly used to getting calls from you on your days off. At the moment, they were few and far between and often you would use them to rest and disconnect, so when a call came through, there was a large chance that it was an emergency. 

This time, when your name flashed across the screen along with a photo that was courtesy of Hyacinth, Violet assumed the worst. You had both been working nonstop for the gala, among other things; the situation with Landon’s arrest was heating up again, as if it already hadn’t caused enough trouble.

What she was not expecting, however, was to hear multiple screaming children on the other end of the line when she picked up. 

“Is everything okay?” 

“No one is dead if that’s what you're asking,” you said. “Yet.” 

“Where in the world are you? I can barely hear anything,” Violet tried to listen past the noise on the phone. 

“I can get into the details later,” you said. “And I’m so sorry to call you like this, but I really need a favour.” 

“Text me the address, I’m coming,” she nodded. 

“But you don’t even know what the favour is,” you said, a hint of disbelief in your voice before turning around and yelling, “Oi! Don’t eat that! It’s not food!” 

“Doesn’t matter. I’m coming. Text me,” she repeated and hung up the phone, getting herself ready while you texted her the details. 

She let Gregory and Hyacinth know she would be out for a bit and got in the car, punching the address into her GPS before being on her way, until she reached a home in a part of London she didn’t frequent very often. 

When she knocked on the door, you opened it, looking exhausted. 

“Don’t ask,” you shook your head and she nodded, trying to bite back a chuckle. 

“What’s the situation?” she asked, noticing the house was much more quiet than when you had called. 

“Well, I’ve got them distracted with the telly for a moment, but that won’t last forever.” 

Violet peeked into the living room and noticed at least ten children sitting there, watching some sort of CBBC program. 

“I feel like I’ve stepped into an alternate dimension,” Violet looked back at you. “What on God’s green earth is going on?” 

“Every couple of years or so, I do all of my friends who are parents a favour and look after their kids for a day. They book spas or stay at home and sleep for 24 hours. I don’t know, the point is it's their time to relax, and my time to be an auntie. Except in the past few years they’ve been shagging like bloody rabbits,” you muttered. “And now there’s ten of them and one of me.” 

“So, you needed an extra pair of hands,” she said. 

“And eyes, ears, and another mouth to yell wouldn’t hurt,” you sighed and placed your palm against your forehead. “I am great with one or two, maybe three. Five last time was pushing it, but then two of them had to have bloody twins and-” You cut yourself off and took a deep breath to calm down. “I’m in over my head, Violet.” 

“Okay, while they’re still distracted, let’s make them something to eat,” she said. “Have they eaten yet?”

“Not since breakfast,” you shook your head. 

“And any dietary restrictions?” 

“Jackson is celiac but other than that the rest of them will eat dirt if they have the chance,” you placed your hands on your hips. 

“Come on, we’ll figure something out,” she placed a hand on your arm, pulling you towards the fridge, opening it and taking a look at what was inside. 

When you had decided what to make together, you felt a tug on your shirt, causing you to look down. 

“Auntie.”

“Yes, my dear,” you put on your best smile and gave your attention to your niece. 

“Who’s that?” she pointed to Violet as the rest of the kids followed along. The youngest at two years old, toddling along until he could be picked up by you. 

“This is my friend, Violet,” you explained. “She’s going to be hanging out with us today. Can you guys introduce yourselves?” 

Each of the kids took turns in a fairly orderly manner, telling Violet their names, until only the shy two year old was left. 

“And this is Raj,” you smiled and gave him a little kiss on the cheek. 

“It’s nice to meet you all,” Violet smiled. “Are you guys hungry?”

“Starving! Auntie hasn’t fed us yet,” Thomas said. 

“It’s kind of hard to feed ten of you when you’re all running every which way like little gremlins,” you teased. “But don’t worry, Violet makes very yummy food and she knows how to cook for lots of people.”

“Really? How come?” Mina asked. 

“Well, I have eight children,” she said. 

“Eight?!” they exclaimed and she chuckled. 

“Yes, eight,” she nodded. “Plus my husband and I made ten.”

“Wow, that’s a big family.”

“It certainly is,” Violet agreed. “Now, who here likes to cook?”

A few of the kids raised their hands and she encouraged them to come with her and she began explaining what would be for lunch and how they could help her prepare it. 

You took the rest of them into the living room and attempted to keep them occupied with some sort of game, but it was hard for you to participate with Raj climbing all over you. 

It was much to your relief when Violet came in saying lunch was ready, and all the kids ran to the table to sit at a plate of food while you took a moment to breathe. 

“You alright?” Violet asked, coming next to you and placing a hand on your shoulder. 

“I’ll survive, it’s one day,” you sighed and pushed yourself up while Violet wrapped an arm around your shoulder, pulling you into her side. 

“They’re quite cute,” she said. “Do you see them all often?”

“Not all at the same time, but fairly regularly,” you chuckled. “Raj and Mina’s mum is the friend I told you I made on those trips I took in first year. Jackson, Thomas, Lillian, and Peter’s dad was in the same program as me for undergrad. Kira and Zoe’s mum and Paula and Ian’s dad were from my master’s. Is that ten? Did I forget anyone?”

“I think that’s ten,” Violet laughed and rubbed her hand up and down your arm. “You should eat something while you still have the chance, I’ll keep them occupied at the table.”

You nodded your head and gave her another grateful look before going to the kitchen while she went to the dining room. After you made yourself a sandwich, you came into the room and watched from afar as Violet engaged the group of children in extensive conversation, giving everyone adequate attention and making sure everyone had a chance to share. 

You supposed being a mother for her was like riding a bike, once it was learnt, the instinct never went away. Her kindness and compassion had always shone through, but it seemed to spill from her smile, or in her touch, as she took a napkin to wipe some food off of Zoe’s face. 

“Violet, do you have any funny stories about Auntie?” Ian asked.”She says we’re too little to know any of her funny stories.”

“Hmm, let me think,” Violet tapped her finger on her chin in an exaggerated pose until she had come up with something appropriate to share. “So, my youngest daughter, Hyacinth, and my son, Gregory, were having an argument,” she began. All of the children had their eyes on her, waiting for whatever details she would reveal about you and you desperately hoped it wasn’t something you would get teased about for the foreseeable future. 

“What were they arguing about?” Lillian asked. 

“Believe it or not, who could make the best smoothie,” Violet said. “They argue about everything, but your auntie was there and she saw them talking and very clearly told them that they were both wrong, because she could make the best smoothie. Naturally, they asked her to prove it and after getting all of the right fruits and juice, she forgot to put the lid on the blender.” The children’s eyes went wide. “And the fruit went everywhere. All over the kitchen, Hyacinth, Gregory, your auntie. It was a mess.”

“Is that why you said no to smoothies today?” Kira asked, and you nodded your head while taking a bite of your sandwich, making the kids laugh. 

They finished eating their lunches and before long chaos had enveloped the house once more. 

“Maybe we can play a game?” you tried to suggest to them over top of all their running around and screaming. 

“What kind of game?” Jackson asked. 

You pursed your lips and adjusted Raj who was on your hip. 

“What about a game with knights and princesses and dragons?”

“Dragons?” 

Peter’s attention was caught, and he quickly got the rest on board, and it didn’t take long for them to begin assigning roles. 

“Violet can be the queen,” Paula said. “And Auntie can be a witch.” 

“A witch?!” you frowned and looked at them. “Absolutely not! Who gave you the idea that I would be a witch and Violet is the queen?” 

“She’s older than you,” Mina said nonchalantly. 

“If you don’t want to be the witch, you can be the jester,” Thomas suggested and there was a chorus of agreement from the children, thinking that role suited you much better. 

“I should have just kept my mouth shut,” you muttered. 

“Raj has to be the baby prince,” Mina said, grabbing your arm and dragging you to Violet so she could take Raj from you. 

Raj didn’t seem to mind changing hands and, in fact, was quick to rest his head on Violet’s shoulder as the children prepared an armchair as her throne and got her to sit down on it. 

Once the game began, you had to be off to the side for a bit while Violet sent the knights on a mission to slay the dragon in the bedroom. 

“Queen Violet, I think it’s time to bring out the clown,” Lillian sat as a princess in the chair next to Violet. 

“Hey, I am not a clown,” you pointed to Lillian. “It’s jester, get it right.” 

“Fine, whatever,” she rolled her eyes and waved her hand. “Bring in the jester.” 

You sighed and stepped in front of Violet, Lillian, Raj, and Paula, clearly unsure of what to do with yourself. 

“I think the jester should dance, don’t you?” Violet looked at the kids around her, and they all nodded their heads while you gave Violet a pleading look. 

“Dance!” Raj giggled, clapping his hands and you pressed your lips together. 

“I am so going to get you back for this,” you looked at Violet, who simply had a radiant smile on her face. 

“Is that a threat to your Queen?” she asked. “Because that is treason, my dear.” 

“The death of a traitor would be better than this,” you motioned to whatever was going on around you. 

“I’m bored,” Paula groaned. “Why won’t the jester dance?” 

“Perhaps because there is no music,” Violet suggested and took out her phone, passing it to Paula to pick a song. 

Already aware of what was coming your way, you mentally prepared yourself, and when the music turned on, you let out the loudest sigh before beginning to dance in front of Violet and the children. Raj, Lillian, and Paula weren’t even trying to contain their laughter. Violet was a little more gracious, but still had a hard time with the ridiculousness of the whole situation. 

“Maybe the jester should sing?” Violet suggested after a moment. 

“Violet, no,” you shook your head. 

“That is Queen Violet to you,” she insisted, Raj still contently tucked in her arms. 

“Okay then, no, Queen Violet, the jester will not be singing,” you curtsied. 

“Then the jester has to kiss the Queen’s hand as an apology!” Lillian declared, and you looked over at her curiously. 

“And what rule book is this coming from?” 

“Auntie, you’re ruining the game,” Paula whined. “Just do it.” 

Violet held out her hand, and you sighed again while taking it in your own, looking down, your thumb brushing down against her fingers, noticing the few freckles that littered her skin there. 

Without trying to think about it too much, you pressed your lips to the back of her hand, making the mistake of looking up at her once your lips had made contact with the soft skin. 

You quickly removed yourself and straightened out your clothes while Violet slowly withdrew her hand, wrapping it back around Raj. 

“We slayed the dragon!” Jackson exclaimed, running back into the room. 

“And I saved Princess Kira!” Mina grinned, holding Kira’s hand and dragging her into the room. 

“Oh, splendid!” Violet clapped her hands together. “We shall have a feast to celebrate.” 

All of the knights came in, and Violet rewarded each one with a kiss to the forehead and a slipped candy from her purse which excited them, but dreaded you to no end. 

The game went on a little longer until Raj got tired and you had to take him away to put him down for a nap. You were tempted to just stay and join him, but you couldn’t leave Violet alone, although when you finally rejoined them, they were all cozied up in the living room under blankets, crowded around Violet who was reading them a story. 

You still couldn’t quite fathom how she had gotten them all to sit down quietly, but regardless of how she did it, it was done. 

Mina insisted you come sit next to her, so you picked up Peter, who was next to her, and sat him on your lap instead, taking his spot. 

The day passed much more smoothly than you had initially anticipated, and once all of your friends had returned from their days out, the children were very reluctant to let you and Violet leave. 

“So, this is the Violet we’ve heard so much about,” your friend Lucas smiled. 

“I don’t know about so much,” you laughed nervously. 

“It’s a decent amount,” Yasmin patted your back, and you chewed on your lip, watching as Violet laughed along, but not without a soft rosy tinge to her cheeks. 

“Are you sure you guys can’t stay for a drink or something?” 

“Unfortunately not,” you shook your head. “Big day at work tomorrow and your kids, I love them to death, but I would like to go to sleep for six months now.” 

Your friends laughed at your dramatic exaggeration, and you said your goodbyes, but just as you were about to slip out, you heard a voice behind you. 

“Did you really think you were going to be able to get away without saying bye to me?” 

You grinned and turned around, wrapping your arms around your best friend and pulling her into a hug. 

“I didn’t realize you were in,” you said and relaxed in her embrace. 

When you pulled apart, your friend, Amara, noticed Violet and gave her a welcoming smile. 

“Hi, I’m Amara,” she put her hand out to shake and Violet took it. “Are you Violet?” 

“Yes, that would be me,” she chuckled. 

“I’ve heard a lot about you,” Amara said. 

“Oh, that seems to be a common thread tonight,” Violet nodded her head, clearly unsure of what to say. 

“All good things, I assure you, even from my kids who have only known you a day,” she chuckled. “I’m really happy I got to meet you. We’ll have to find someone else to watch the kids for a day so all the adults can have the chance to get to know you.” 

Violet smiled, “I’d like that a lot.” 

You watched the exchange with some trepidation, only for it to vanish as they continued to speak. 

“I won’t keep you guys much longer, I know you must have a lot of work to do, but thank you for coming and helping with our hoard. Both of you.” 

“Any day, Mara,” you wrapped your arms around her once more in a hug before the three of you exchanged last goodbyes, and you and Violet stepped outside of the house, both walking to your cars.

“Hey, Violet?” 

She looked up from where she was trying to get her keys out of her purse. 

“Yes?” 

“I-” you paused. “Thank you again for today. Really.” 

Violet smiled, “I think I should be thanking you.” 

“Me?” you chuckled, leaning against your car. “For what?”

“Always finding new and interesting ways to make sure I have a break,” she settled on. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” 

“See you tomorrow, Vi,” you waved and climbed into the front seat of your car, watching as she pulled out of the driveway and taking a few moments to yourself, a prayer for strength on the tip of your tongue. 

TAGLIST —

“Another day, another budget,” you sighed, closing your laptop and stretching your arms over your head, an exhale escaping your lips. Violet was still clacking away on her keyboard, her glasses pressed against her face in an attempt to keep them from sliding down her nose. 

“Finished the review?” she asked, still not looking up from her laptop. 

“Yep and sent it off,” you nodded. “You working on gala prep?”

She let out a short puff of air before leaning back in her seat, closing her laptop. 

“As much as I can, I have to wait to hear back from vendors though,” she said. “And it looks like it’s just about lunch.”

“I’m famished.” You placed a hand on your stomach. Having decided to work in the city, out of the office in your apartment, you were in close proximity to good restaurants and to any potential meetings that would come up with vendors. 

“Do you know any good spots?” Violet asked, seeing that neither of you were wanting to prepare something yourselves. 

“There’s a few just down the street, could be a nice little break,” you stood up from your chair. 

Violet pushed her glasses up into her hair, letting them tangle there, and followed your lead. 

“Trust me, they’ll be right up your alley,” you assured her,  and she watched you curiously as you left the room, wondering what you thought her alley, so to speak, could be. 

As usual, you exited out of a side door of the apartment complex and walked side by side down the busy streets. Violet was cognizant of everything around you both, ensuring there was no unwanted attention. Each lifted phone, each lingering gaze created an uncomfortable churning in her stomach that she wished she could ignore.

“No one’s looking.” Your voice rang clearly into her ears. “This is a busy area. Everyone's too caught up in their affairs to care.”

She pressed her lips together into a complacent smile and nodded her head, a hand moving to rest on her stomach as you continued to walk, before turning some place a little quieter and entering what looked like a small shop. 

As you were catching up with the hostess who was clearly familiar with you, Violet did a double take at a couple who was waiting to be seated. 

“Colin?” she blinked, almost harshly to ensure she wasn’t hallucinating. 

“Mum!” Colin turned around, a surprised but happy smile on his face. “I didn’t know you were in the city today.”

“I didn’t know you were in the country today,” Violet said while she pulled her son into a hug, exchanging kisses on each cheek. “Penelope, my dear, how are you?”

Violet’s attention quickly turned to her soon-to-be daughter-in-law, and Penelope was more than happy to accept a warm greeting from Violet. 

“Doing good, very busy as you can imagine. Work and wedding preparations tend to take up the majority of one’s time.”

“I didn’t realize you were in town,” Violet repeated. “Why didn’t you call?”

“Well,” Colin sucked some air through his teeth. “We’re only here for a few days, we didn't want to trouble anyone.”

“Violet, I got a table sorted-oh-” you were cut off, seeing the familiar faces in front of you, although you had only seen them in pictures. “Colin and Penelope, right?”

“Yes,” Penelope nodded with a smile. “I’m sorry, and you are?”

You chuckled with an apology and introduced yourself. 

“I work for the Bridgertons, we haven’t met formally yet, but I’ve been acquainted with your mother and sisters,” you explained. 

“Oh yes, my mother mentioned that to me,” Penelope nodded. 

“Wait, I’m sorry,” Violet placed a hand on Colin’s arm. “You didn’t want to trouble anyone?”

“Mum, I thought we moved past that,” Colin laughed nervously. 

“I haven’t seen you in months, we are not just moving past this.” She shook her head. 

“How about we get a table together?” you suggested. “And Colin can promise to call next time he’s in London?”

You sent the third Bridgerton son a look and he nodded his head, accepting the conditions. 

“And we’ll pay,” Penelope added. “Our treat.”

Violet was not an unreasonable woman, so she accepted, and you amended your table request to the hostess who quickly grabbed two more menus and got you a slightly larger table. 

“So what brought you to the city today?” Colin asked. 

“I have an office in my apartment,” you said. 

“We’ve been working out of there when we have to plan for the gala because it’s closer to the venue and all the vendors,” Violet explained. “Speaking of, you two will be in town for that, yes?”

“Wouldn’t miss it for the world,” Penelope smiled. 

“Where are you both off to next?” you asked, already knowing what you’d order from the menu. 

“We fly out to South Africa in two days,” Colin said. 

“Business or pleasure?” 

“Always business,” Penelope chuckled. 

The hostess briefly interrupted your conversation to bring you water and ask if she could get you any other drinks to start, and when she left, Colin was quick to jump into the conversation again. 

“Mum, you seem like you’ve got a lot on your mind,” he began. “Everything going smoothly?”

“As smoothly as one can hope,” she nodded. “It’s just been a busy few months, we’ve been going non-stop, especially since Anthony and Marianne aren’t here.”

“It’s two people doing the work of four,” you jumped in. “But Violet always seems to handle it so graciously.” 

“Oh trust me, you just haven’t been around for the ungracious moments,” Violet chuckled. “After this gala is finished, I’m sure everything will fall into place.”

“That’s still quite a few months out,” Penelope commented. 

“Are you going to last that long running on fumes?” Colin added. 

Violet wasn’t sure why but she looked at you for an answer. To be honest, she wasn’t sure how you were going to manage it.

“I’ll make sure there’s time for breaks,” you filled in. “I think Violet just needs to find a good outlet and make time for it.”

“Oh, do you?” she raised her brows and chuckled. 

“Yes, I do,” you nodded, and Colin and Penelope seemed to agree with the sentiment. “I don’t know, maybe you need to pick up painting again, or needlepoint, or writing, just something creative that calls to you.”

“I think she’s right,” Colin spoke up. “When was the last time you did something for fun? Art, or active?”

“I really can’t say,” Violet shrugged. 

“Maybe it’s time you found what gives you that spark,” Penelope said. “That’s how I feel about writing. Even with what I do for work, there’s so much control and power you have over words, it’s almost comforting.”

Violet looked between the group on the table then down at the menu, feeling a little more conscious of herself. 

“I will certainly try,” she smiled, still looking down at the menu, and you discreetly patted her leg under the table. “Now, I’m sure South Africa is just the start of your travels, where will you be heading afterwards?”

It didn’t go unnoticed by you how she tried to switch the topic of conversation, but you would be sure to push her a little more later to take some time for herself, even if she felt like she couldn’t.

“Actually,” Colin leaned back in his seat, “we’re going to be in town for the foreseeable future after that.”

“Really?” Violet looked confused. 

Ever since Colin and Penelope had been doing this work there was never any down time or rest. They would fly to every corner of the earth, touch down in town for a few days to a few weeks before being off again. 

Penelope looked up at Colin, an excited smile on her face while they shared a nod before looking back at you and Violet. 

“We were going to wait to say anything,” Penelope began, and you looked over at Violet, seeing where the conversation was going and knowing that she did too, her eyes widening. 

“Oh my God.” She covered her mouth with her hand. “You’re pregnant?”

Penelope pressed her lips together into a smile and nodded. 

“We wanted to wait until after we came back so we could tell everyone together, but I think considering the circumstances it makes much more sense to do it this way,” Colin chuckled as Violet reached out over the table to hold Penelope’s hand. 

“Oh goodness,” Violet let out a breathy laugh, the joy clearly shimmering in her eyes through happy tears. 

“Congratulations, you two,” you smiled. “We’ll be sure to keep our lips sealed so you can tell the rest of your family when you get back.”

“It does feel really nice to tell someone,” Penelope admitted. “I think it makes it more real.”

“How are you feeling, my dear?” Violet asked. “Everything is good? You’re healthy?” 

“Yes, everything is good,” Penelope nodded. “A little bit of nausea here and there, but nothing unmanageable yet.”

Violet looked over at Colin and wondered quietly to herself how all of her children could grow up so fast. It felt like just yesterday they were babies in her arms and now some of them were holding their own little ones. 

“If you two need absolutely anything-”

“We will call,” Colin assured. “I heard the talk with Daphne when she was expecting and then the same one when Kate was pregnant with Eddie. Eight pregnancies and you’ve experienced everything under the sun.”

“Well not everything,” Violet rolled her eyes a little at the exaggeration. “But close.”

“Either way, when we’re back, I’d love to talk to you more about it,” Penelope said. “I’ll bring back some special tea and we can do it over that.”

“Sounds perfect to me,” Violet grinned. 

Your hostess found the perfect lull in the conversation to come and ask whether or not you were ready to order, and everyone was eager to get back to the conversation and quickly answered her questions before turning to face each other again. 

“Do you have any children?” Colin asked you. 

“No, I don’t.” You shook your head. “Currently only enlisted as an auntie and babysitter.”

“I have her on retainer for Hyacinth and Gregory,” Violet teased, making Colin laugh especially. 

“I do enjoy spending time with children though,” you said with a chuckle, still thinking about Violet’s comment. 

“Both August and Caroline took quite a liking to her when they met,” Violet added.

“Really? Even Auggie?” Penelope asked. “He’s so shy, it took him ages to get comfortable with Colin and I.”

“I think Violet may have had some kind of hand in that,” you smiled gingerly. 

“And Caroline, he saw you with her and figured if his sister liked you, he should too,” she explained.

“Well if you’re planning on sticking around, you’ll get some more experience with baby Bridgerton-Featherington,” Colin noted. 

“Trust me, it will be much appreciated,” you chuckled. “My friends can’t seem to stop having kids, every time I turn around, there’s another pregnancy announcement.”

“We’re at that point too,” Penelope nodded. “Graduations, promotions, weddings, babies, everyone is doing something.”

“You seem to have three of those under your belt,” Violet chuckled. “Will you wait for the baby to be born before having the wedding then?”

“We were thinking that,” Colin nodded. “That way we don’t have to rush anything.”

“That makes sense,” you nodded. “And then the baby can be with you in all of the photos, it will be a sweet thing to look back on.”

“I thought so too,” Penelope grinned.

“And no need for Daphne and Anthony to fight over which of their kids gets to be the ring bearer,” Colin crossed his arms over his chest, a smirk on his lips. 

The lunch chatter very expectedly revolved around children and babies with small bits and pieces here and there about the wedding. When the bill came, even though Colin and Penelope had offered to pay, Violet snuck her card in and insisted on taking care of it. 

While you were walking back to your apartment, you could see the joy and excitement at the prospect of another grandchild, especially from another one of her children, but there was something else behind her eyes you couldn’t quite place. 

For the moment you elected to ignore it, but by the end of the day, the sun getting lower on the horizon, the excitement had dissipated and the stress from work had replaced it, but the look in her blue eyes had not changed. 

“Hey, is everything okay?” you asked while she was packing up her things and getting ready to leave. 

“Hmm?” 

She was confused by your question, looking up at you with a curious frown. 

“Why wouldn’t I be?” 

“You just seem…” Your voice trailed off as you tilted your head to look at her. 

“Seem what?” 

“Far off. Distant,” you settled on. “What’s on your mind?” 

Violet continued to pack her bag, “Just the gala, there’s a lot we still need to think about, speakers, invitations, donations for auction,” she listed. 

“It’s not the gala.” You shook your head, placing your forearms on the desk in front of you, leaning in. “You had the same look in your eyes when we left lunch with Colin and Penelope.” 

Violet wanted to answer your question, but she became caught on the fact that you looked at her eyes. How had she not noticed that before? Did you look at her eyes as often as she found herself staring into yours? What did you see when you looked into them? Why were you looking in the first place?

“Lettie, what’s really going on?” your voice was soft and concerned. 

She chuckled and shook her head, “That’s it, actually.” 

Now it was your turn to be confused. 

She gripped onto the back of the seat in front of her, her fingers rapping against the fabric in a rhythmic pattern. 

“I love my grandchildren,” she began, “more than life itself, but it just makes me feel…”  She shook her head and you got a sense of what she meant. “And it’s not just that, my body is telling me every day that it really isn’t what it used to be. Whether it’s the forgetfulness or-or the fact that I can’t seem to sleep through the night anymore.”

“How long has this been bothering you?” you asked. 

She chewed on her lip, “Since the change.” 

“I’m sorry, the what?” you frowned and leaned forwards. 

Violet pressed her lips together in a thin line. 

“Since my cycles stopped,” she said more quietly. 

“Oh, you mean menopause?” 

Violet nodded her head and you leaned back in your chair with a contemplative look on your face. 

“I just sometimes wish I was seventeen again,” Violet said quietly and you looked up at her with a sympathetic gaze. 

“Seventeen?” 

Violet chuckled and leaned over the back of the chair. 

“I know it’s specific, but I didn’t have many responsibilities, I was young and in love, I had my whole life ahead of me.” 

You stood up from your chair, grabbing your phone and keys. 

“And you still do,” you said. “Come on, let me prove it to you.” 

Violet looked down at her phone, quickly unlocking it, sending a text to Gregory and Hyacinth saying she would be back a little later than expected before slipping the device in her purse and following you out of the office. 

“Your car or mine?” you asked. 

“Maybe mine, yours looks like it could break down any minute.” She looked over to where your car was parked in its designated spot. She was not wrong about that in the slightest. 

You put your hands out, and she reluctantly gave you her keys, only because she didn’t like completely giving up that control, which you were well aware of, but you also knew she needed this, and you wanted it to be a surprise. 

She got into the car, watching you start the engine and be on your way. 

Initially, she wanted to ask where you were going, but as the route became more familiar, she watched you curiously. 

“Are we going to Aubrey Hall?” she asked, and you nodded your head. 

“Well, sort of. Just wait, you’ll see.” 

She continued to watch closely as you drove on to the property, but took one of the back trails through some of the fields until you reached a slightly wooded area that bordered a small lake. 

“Benedict told me about this,” you explained, turning off the car and putting the keys in the cup holder. “And I think it’ll help you get in touch with your roots.” 

“My roots?” Violet looked at you confused as you stepped out of the car, the tail end of the summer sunset light casting a glow on you, brightening your already mischievous eyes. 

She followed you outside of the car, and watched you take off your shoes and socks before pulling your shirt over your head, tossing it into the grass, your pants following soon after. 

Violet wasn’t even trying to hide her dropped jaw. You stood before her in nothing but a bra and underwear and continued to walk towards the lake, without much thought to look back. Her eyes dragged along the curve of your hips and waist, noticing how each part of your body moved so distinctly as you walked through the grass and towards the water.

Instead of prolonging any shock to your body, you jumped into the cold water and took a few harsh breaths while your body acclimated itself, Violet still standing by the car and watching this all unfold, even more mesmerized by the sheen and glisten that came to your skin as a result.

“Are you coming or what?” you called after her. “You want to feel seventeen? Do something kind of stupid.” 

She was having a hard time convincing herself, but even as she was debating in her own head, her hands came to the hem of her shirt and pulled it over her head, dropping it to the ground as she took off her heels and unzipped her skirt, letting it drop over her shoes. 

She walked over to the edge of the lake and dipped her foot in, hissing at the cold water. 

“It’s a little slippery,” you said. “Here, let me give you a hand,” you offered, putting a dripping wet hand out for her to take. 

Without question she accepted, which was her mistake, because you tugged her forcefully into the water, making her fall in with a shriek. 

When she came up and out of the water, she pushed her wet hair out of her face and looked at you with a playful sense of betrayal. 

“I was going to come in!” She insisted. 

“I saw that look,” you laughed, “There was no way in hell I was letting you back out.” 

When your laughter didn’t subside, she looked at you questioningly.

“You pull me in and you’re still laughing at me like that?” she asked, with a bit of disbelief.

“No, no it’s not that,” you came closer, the water having gotten deep quite quickly, coming over your chest. “It’s just your mascara is running.” 

“Oh shit!” she looked at you wide eyed and quickly tried to turn away but you pulled her back. 

“Come on, you can't see a thing, let me,” you said, taking some of the lake water and gently rubbing the makeup away from underneath one eye before moving to the other until only a faint black shadow remained. “That’s as good as it’s going to get for now.” 

“Christ, look at what you’ve done to me,” she said, a laugh on the tip of her tongue as she shook her head. 

“I don’t know what you mean,” you teased. “You’re seventeen, you’ve just gone out for a summer swim with a friend.” 

She said your name in a playfully warning tone which got your attention, making you look back at her seriously. 

“I’m not seventeen,” she said, “but that’s okay. I…I can see that now.” 

Your lips pulled up into a smile and you tapped the bottom of her chin with a curled index finger. 

“They grow up so fast,” you sighed, and she chuckled. Violet swatted your hand away, but you simply became more irritating by splashing her instead. She shrieked again when the water hit her and immediately retaliated until there was no doubt that the two of you were drenched. 

Once the splashing stopped, Violet let herself float in the water, taking in a deep breath of the fresh air before dunking her head again and swimming toward the middle of the body of water. You watched her as she moved in the lake, so gracefully, as if she’d kept up the habit and, despite giving up something she loved so dearly all those years ago, tonight she took it back, without fear, without question, she allowed herself something. An outlet. 

Violet had not been seventeen for a very long time. Her life seemed to fly past her much faster than she would have liked. A part of her wished to go back and experience all of those wonderful and happy moments in her life once more, so she could savor that time a little more than she had initially. It seemed absurd, but she would experience everything in her life again, exactly as it was, because it was hers. Happiness, mistakes, tragedy, and sadness. Every single part of it belonged to her and she would own it until the day she died. 

And treading water in the middle of the lake, even if she was no longer seventeen, her younger years but a distant memory, with a look into your eyes and a smile on both of your faces, she knew she still had a lot of her life left to live, and so much more in front of her than she could have possibly imagined. 

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