BURSTS INTO TEARS
doing the shitass task of dress hunting when i promise you there is nothing i want to do less rn and then having him say he bets I'll look so handsome I'm. WAAAAAUUUUGHHHH
I won't I won't I won't I'll have a full face of makeup and I'll hate the fit and hate the two hours i have to sit in it all but
He really is so kind.
Today was so hard. I gave the chorister stuff a shot without doing all the prep i convinced myself I needed bc i was like maybe it's all in my head. Maybe people won't give a fuck if i wear the same fuckass dress and don't wear makeup and just show up like i do for teaching
And then i find out no!!!! It's not all in my head!!!! Several people asked why i wore the same dress 2 weeks in a row. Someone asked if i was in need of clothes . MOTHERFUCKERS I HAVE A WASHING MACHINE AND I WEAR THE DAMN THING FOR 8 HOURS TOTAL PER MONTH get a grip!!!!!!!
And someone asked if I'd been crying bc my face was blotchy and another asked if i was tired bc i had dark circles under my eyes and another deadass asked if i was having an allergic reaction. Jesus Christ man.
None of this shit happened when i was just teaching. And then just bc i stand up there and wave my fucking hand suddenly everyone has to nitpick your appearance. What the hell. Just tell me i look like shit and walk away.
so. no I probably won't look handsome and for 2 hours a week I'm gonna hate how i look. but his kindness is appreciated
