Requests open!

wisteria - kochou shinobu x f!reader

heavy grief - kochou shinobu x f!reader

limited time - kochou shinobu x f!reader

headcanons on kochou shinobu 's reaction to reader bringing the furriest cat ever

unexpected friend - kochou shinobu x f!reader

pretty doctor - kochou shinobu x gn!reader

relax - kochou shinobu x f!reader 18+ MINORS DNI

tea - kochou shinobu x f!reader

inconvenient habit - kochou shinobu x f!reader

yandere!shinobu x f!reader

You didn't know when it started.

When exactly that heavy, intense, searing yet strangely soothing wave of feeling washing over you the moment something reminds you of her.

Sometimes it’s the clouds forming into a shape that mirrors her silhouette, her delicate features so perfect and so beautiful, it always effortlessly takes your breath away. Other times it's the sight of someone’s hair, its dark shade uncannily reminiscent of hers. Something so small yet easily bringing you into a state of panic. That someone like her, someone so talented, so skillful, so admirable, would possibly be in close proximity to you.

And every single time, you find yourself irresistibly drawn into thoughts about the tiny woman that constantly cloud your mind. You wonder what she might be doing at this very instant. Is she buried in her work, her brows subtly furrowed, so focused and yet easily makes your heart flutter either way? Did she have time to eat lunch, or is she pushing herself too hard again?

The thought of her taking a moment to nourish herself brings a soft smile to your lips, but then another question tugs at your mind—does she ever wonder the same way you always wonder about her? Is she curious about your day, what you’re doing, what meals you’ve had? Does she think of you in those rare quiet moments, when her thoughts are free to wander? That possibility sends a warm thrill through you, a giddy feeling you secretly liked. You find yourself yearning to know if you occupy her mind as much as she does yours, if she ever pauses in her routine to think of you, to hope that you’re well, to wish you were near.

Deep down, you know she doesn't.

In the wake of that fleeting moment of bliss, an aftershock of varying emotions strikes you hard and it hurts. The guilt crashes over you first, a bitter tide that instantly drowns the warmth you just felt. How could you take advantage of her kind and innocent gestures? The reminders to take care of yourself, her soft hand clasping yours in comfort, purple hued eyes scanning you for injuries as her mouth shapes into that usual polite smile. All of those meant nothing more, nothing less.

Why not? You always thought. Why couldn't it be something more? Something more precious? Something more intimate? Why couldn't she feel the same way you were feeling towards her? Why?

Why?

Anger follows close behind, a searing self-directed fury at the thoughts you dared to entertain. How could you allow yourself to feel this way about her? To easily slip into your selfish desires, without a thought about what she could've felt about it. To fantasize and overthink every interaction you've had with her. From simple glances to her searing touches. You clutch your aching chest in frustration, tears at bay and ready to shed at how truly selfish you were.

Then hopelessness of the situation settles in, heavy and suffocating, as doubts spiral uncontrollably through your mind. Is it even right to think of her like this? The questions gnaw at you, relentless and unforgiving. Can such feelings be appropriate? Are women even allowed to love one another in this way? Why were you different? Why couldn't you be a man? Why couldn't you love without it being unforgivable? Why couldn't she love you back? Think of you back? Stare at you back? Why couldn't she? Why?

Why?

The societal expectations, the unspoken rules, the harsh reality— they loom large, casting a shaken horror to you. Inducing a fear.

A fear to be avoided.

A fear to be hated.

A fear to be unloved.

A fear to be left alone.

Despite the terror you felt, the tremble in your limbs, the ache in your chest—your heart never stopped beating. Your breath never stopped stuttering. Your skin never stopped flushing. Your mind never stopped thinking of her. Your eyes never stopped finding her in a sea of crowds. You never stopped having hope that she will find you too, that she'll think of you too, dream to kiss you too, yearn to be with you too and be the one beside you, too.

You wish it would. You wish it just stops already. You prayed it soon will, that you could wash away these sinful desires and stop being so different. Stop being so selfish.

And they must've heard you. Whoever they are. They stumbled across your aching state, you crying soul, your breaking heart, and felt the need to help you as they gave you an easy way out.

Not too long after, you cough out a single wisteria petal onto your palm.

-

The warmth of sun bathed the Butterfly Estate's garden into different colorful hues as laughter erupted around you. Inosuke's hand clapped firmly against your back, nearly knocking the breath from your lungs, while Tanjiro sweat drops at your expense.

"You did it!" Tanjiro’s kind smile was bright, his eyes sparkling with pride. “Kinoe rank! That’s incredible, [Name]-san!"

“Tch, incredible doesn’t even cover it,” Inosuke barked, folding his arms, his boar head tilted smugly. "Of course you’d rise faster than these weaklings. You’re almost on my level now!"

Zenitsu nearly wailed at that, throwing his arms in the air. "Ehhh? What's that supposed to mean, you reeking boar!?” He scowls before leaning towards you with a wide smile, cheeks red and you look at him disgust seeing him about to declare his undying love to you again.

"Don't even think about it, you creep."

"Guh—! I didn't say anything?!"

"Your smile tells all your intentions, moron!"

You sigh before a laugh bubbled out of you. The three of them bickered endlessly, their energy easily infecting you to join in the fun as well. Despite how all of you were almost killed by the two Upper Moon 6 in the Entertainment District, you can't help but feel thankful that they seem unaffected by the traumatic experience. For a moment, you almost forgot the weight pressing against your ribcage, almost forgot the petals that ached to claw their way up your throat.

Almost.

Shinobu’s voice floated into the circle, soft but unmistakable. “What’s all the commotion about?”

The chatter silenced slightly as she stepped closer to the engawa the four of you were sitting on, her haori fluttering alongside the playful wind. Her purple eyes almost immediately landed on you, warm, proud—an expression you rarely saw directed so openly your way.

"I heard the news." She smiled, genuine, bright enough to twist the knife deeper in your chest. "Congratulations, [Name]. You deserve it after all your hard work."

Your heart stuttered violently. The burn in your throat returned with great intensity at the unexpected appearance. (Is it really unexpected? It's her estate after all, you curse yourself.) You swallowed hard, forcing the petals back down where they shredded against your insides.

“T-Thank you,” you muttered, bowing your head slightly. If she noticed the strain in your voice, she didn’t show it.

Tanjiro beamed between the two of you, oblivious. "See, even Shinobu thinks so! You’re amazing, [Name]!"

"Y-Yeah," Zenitsu chimed in, tugging nervously at his sleeve. "I-I mean, that's really awesome!"

Shinobu chuckled softly, folding her hands neatly before her. "Well, it’s certainly true. [Name] has always worked very hard." Her gaze lingered on you a moment too long, seemingly curious.

You could feel her drawing closer without moving a single step, her voice wrapping around you like silk, like it always did when she talked to you so softly. You had to force yourself to step back, your feet nearly stumbling against the stones of the courtyard.

"I—I should get some rest," you said quickly, cutting into the flow of conversation. "It’s been a long day."

"Already?" Tanjiro blinked. "But we haven't had lunch yet—"

Shinobu interrupted gently, her tone carrying a genuine weight of concern. “You do seem.. tired. Are you feeling unwell, [Name]?”

Your pulse jumped. Her perceptiveness was a curse. You shook your head too fast, almost frantically. "I’m fine. Really. Just.. busy."

Shinobu tilted her head, a slight crease forming between her brows. "Busy? At your own celebration?"

You clenched your fists at your sides, the petals shifting inside your chest like coiled thorns. Her words were too much—too close. You wanted her to smile at you forever, and yet you couldn’t bear the way her kindness set the disease aflame.

"I said I’m fine!" The words snapped harsher than you meant, cutting through the conversation sharply and then.. silence. The air shifted instantly, Tanjiro’s smile dropped, Zenitsu’s eyes widening, even Inosuke’s boasting silenced for once.

Shinobu blinked, her lips parting slightly, the confusion clear in her eyes.

You couldn’t stand it. Couldn’t stand the possibility of her pressing further. So you turned, storming away before anyone could call after you.

The quiet of the hallways wrapped around you like a vice, your hand flying to your mouth just as the first petal forced its way free. Single petals of Wisteria spilled onto the floor, pale and trembling. You staggered into the nearest bathroom, barely making it before the next wave came—petals, petals, and then blood.

Droplets of crimson stained the violet, soaking into your trembling hands. Your chest heaved as you clenched your jaw, the truth settling heavy as stone.

You felt the weight of the disease rest heavier than it ever did and yet all your heart did was think back to her hurt expression.

-

Shinobu had always considered herself a patient woman. Her job demanded it, after all. Patience for the wounded, patience for the grieving, patience even for those too stubborn to accept treatment, patience for revenge. And yet, with you, that patience was wearing thin.

She spotted you again that evening by the engawa, the setting sun spilling orange light across the polished wood. You stood there with arms folded, gaze fixed hard on the horizon. You didn’t even turn when she approached. You never did anymore.

"Ah, there you are!" Shinobu’s voice chimed, smooth as ever, but carrying that deliberate airy tone she wore like armor. "You’ve been rather slippery these days. One might think you’re avoiding me."

Your jaw tensed, but you didn’t move. The weight of her presence pressed against your shoulders all the same.

"I came to check on you," she continued, kneeling neatly beside you as though the silence didn’t sting. "No bruises? No fresh wounds you’ve been hiding from me? You know I still don’t take kindly to secret injuries."

Still nothing. Just the soft rustle of your sleeve as she observes your fist tightening at your side.

She tilted her head, her butterfly ornament catching the fading light. "You’ve never been this quiet with me before." The softness in her tone faltered for the briefest second before recovering as quickly as it appeared. “So, what changed?”

Your throat closed around the words that never came.

The question lingered, uncomfortably,  She was smiling, of course; she always smiled but her eyes searched your face with a sharpness that cut far deeper than her voice. You can feel your own heart beat stutter in ache.

You turned, just enough for her to see your face in profile. The silence between you wasn’t thick with comfort anymore. It was heavy, suffocating.

Her smile didn’t falter, but her words did. "Did I.. do something?"

The question, so uncharacteristically bare of her usual teasing, cut deeper than any reprimand. She looked at you then not as the calm, unflappable Insect Hashira, but as Shinobu— a friend you lost due to your own unrelenting feelings.

Your lips parted, but no words followed. You had nothing to give her — not an answer, not even a lie.

And that, perhaps, was worse.

Shinobu’s fingers curled in her lap, nails pressing lightly into her palm, "I see," she murmured, in that same airy tone she always held, yet today you can feel it falter, the pain in your chest worsening in guilt, even more so hearing her next words. "Well, I won’t force you."

And almost immediately, you can feel the thin walls in your throat about to break open.

You stood abruptly, the boards creaking beneath your weight. For a heartbeat, she thought you’d finally turn, finally explain why your eyes no longer met hers. But you only walked away, steps quickly retreating down the corridor, leaving her in the amber light of the evening.

Shinobu sat very still, back straight, hands folded neatly, her lips curved in that practiced softness. To anyone else, she would have looked perfectly composed. Untouched.

But her chest ached with something sharp, unfamiliar, and she hated that it was you who had put it there.

Because she couldn’t quite understand why it hurt so much that you didn’t look back.

Shinobu looked down at her lap, feeling the heaviness, unaware as you stumbled into the hallway, entering a random room—a pair of boys staring as you released the bloody stem that clogged and tear your throat open, feeling your lungs as if on fire before two pair of hands try to reel your consciousness in place.

-

Shinobu sought you out again and again, determined to talk sense into you, but every attempt was met with silence, or worse, the hollow politeness that kept her at arm’s length. Shinobu was not naïve— she could see the shadows under your eyes, the unnatural paleness of your skin, the faint tremor in your hands when you thought no one was looking. Something was wrong. Terribly wrong. And you refused to let her in.

It was on the second week when her patience finally cracked. She had been passing the ward, carrying a tray of medicine, when she heard raised voices from within. Zenitsu’s voice, high and frantic, cut through the quiet like a blade.

“Zenitsu, what are you..!?” Tanjiro sounded startled, caught off guard.

“I’m serious, Tanjiro! You know I would never joke about this!”

Shinobu paused, her steps faltering. She never cared to eavesdrop to any of her patient's conversations but something in Zenitsu’s desperation rooted her in place.

"We should get [Name] out of here, as soon as possible!"

Her chest tightened. What? Out of here? Why?

“Calm down. How can you be so sure that she’s..” Tanjiro’s voice broke, trembling.

"..that she’s dying?"

Shinobu’s breath stuttered, the tray trembling faintly in her hands. Dying?

You?

Her mind blanked, and she strained to hear more, every nerve alight. The blood in her veins froze in a mid stop and her world felt like it stumbled.

"I can hear it!" Zenitsu pleaded, his voice cracking with fear. "The strain in her throat, the way her lungs gurgle. That’s not a normal sound to make!"

"Zenitsu—"

"Did you forget what happened the other day, Tanjiro?"

Shinobu’s pulse pounded in her ears.

The other day? What happened?

Tanjiro’s silence stretched long and heavy weighted. He went quiet, as if frozen and terrified.

After a few seconds, Zenitsu's voice echoed again. "I could never forget.."

Shinobu’s knuckles whitened on the tray as Zenitsu's words tumbled on.

"The blood.. The smell of rotting flowers. The sound of her lungs and heart in pain and seemingly clogged. It was the first time I… I couldn’t even move. She was on her knees, coughing so hard she—she couldn’t breathe. She was crying and there was so much blood. I-I.. I can't just— Shit." His voice cracked, thick with guilt.

Shinobu’s breath caught. The world tilted violently, nausea clawing up her throat.

“A-and you know damn well why she went like that!” Zenitsu’s tone was sharp with exasperation, almost accusing.

Tanjiro’s lip trembled audibly in his words. “I know.”

Shinobu froze.

Tanjiro knew. Zenitsu knew. And yet, she..

Her heart plummeted as she pressed a trembling hand to her lips.

You were dying.

The tray clattered against the floor, uncaring as the medicine shattered across the floor. Her body moved before her mind could catch up, rushing down the hall, past startled patients and fellow slayers. She ignored them all, the apologies muttured, the worried questions, all drowned beneath the thunder of her own heartbeat.

You were dying. You were dying.

The phrase echoed like a curse with every desperate step she took until she reached your room.

She didn’t knock. Didn’t even pause to catch her breath. She flung the door open—

And her heart shattered.

You were there, slumped over the bed, your hand pressed to your mouth as violet petals stained red spilled through your trembling fingers.

"[Name]—!"

Shinobu’s voice fractured on your name. The sight before her ripped the ground from under her feet: you, bent over the futon, body convulsing, purple wisteria petals spilling in frantic waves from your mouth, streaked thick with blackened blood. Each cough shook you so violently she thought your ribs would splinter.

The stench hit next— iron, rot, and the faint sweetness of wisteria all tangled together in a nauseating haze.

Shinobu’s mask shattered instantly. There was no composed persona. Only raw panic.

"No, no, no, please, not like this!" She was at your side in a blur, falling to her knees, hands trembling as she grasped your shoulders. "Stay with me! Just breathe, keep breathing—"

You shoved her back, teeth bared, blood dripping from your lips. "Get out!"

The force of it startled her, knocked her back on her heels. For a second, she just stared at you, stunned, her chest tight and stinging. "W-What…?"

"I said GET OUT!" you roared, your voice shredding at the edges, breaking off into another violent cough that scattered more petals across the futon. Your knees buckled, body trembling, but still you glared at her with all the strength you could muster. "Are you deaf, Shinobu?! I don’t want you here—don’t you dare ever show your face to me again!"

The words tore through her like a blade.

Her voice, usually so light and careful, cracked under the weight of desperation. "Why?!" she cried out, going towardz you despite your aggressive resistance. "Why are you doing this to me? You’ve never— You— Why are you pushing me away when you’re.." Her voice trembled, her throat tight with grief, "..when you’re dying right in front of me?!"

You staggered upright, one hand clutching the bedpost to keep yourself from collapsing. Your entire body shook with the effort of standing. Each breath rattled like broken glass in your chest.

“..because of you.”

The words ripped free, leaving the room in stunned silence.

Shinobu froze. Her eyes widened, shimmering with hurt and disbelief. “…What?” she whispered, voice barely audible. “What are you saying?”

A laugh bubbled from your throat—broken, bitter, soaked in despair. It sounded more like a sob. "I’m like this because of you, Shinobu." Your knees gave, but you clung to the bedpost, refusing to crumble completely. "Because I.." you coughed, a spray of crimson staining your lips, "..I love you too much."

Her heart stuttered violently, as though something had seized it in a vice.

"So much," you rasped, shaking with every word, "that my stomach churns every time I see you smile. So much that my throat clogs until I can’t speak your name. So much that my chest burns, like it’s eating itself alive. Even as I descend to death, I can't help but yearn to be alongside you."

Shinobu’s hands flew to your arms, gripping tight as if sheer force could anchor you to this world. "No. No, don’t say that. You’re not dying. You can’t be." Her voice was trembling, breaking. "Tell me why I’m the cause- tell me, and I’ll fix it. I’ll make a cure, I swear I’ll-"

You shook your head, tears blurring your vision. "I'm sorry. I don't mean to put you in this situation but I just— I'm sorry, Shinobu. I'm so sorry."

Her composure cracked entirely. The sharp sting of grief, the unbearable helplessness, feelings she had buried since Kanae’s death. For years she had worn a smile in place of her mourning, honeyed words in place of her screams, but now it all tore through her, raw and merciless. You were her rock ever since the two of you were younger and immature and now.. now when she haven't even yet taken revenge? Another loved one taken from her while she remained incapable of going against it?

"Don’t—don’t you dare say that!" Her voice rose into something raw and trembling. “Don’t you dare give up on me!”

You pushed at her weakly, your strength nearly gone. But her hold didn’t falter. She refused to let go.

"[Name]!" she begged, shaking you lightly, frantically. She inhales sharply, "Look at me. Don’t turn away, stay here. Don't—"

You opened your mouth, but instead of words, a violent gush of petals and thick, dark blood poured out, spilling over your chin, staining her haori, hot and sticky against her skin.

Her world cracked open.

"No! NO! Someone—HELP!" Shinobu’s scream tore through the halls, raw and desperate, a sound she hadn’t made since Kanae’s last breath. "Please, someone, HELP ME!"

She caught you in her arms, pulling you against her chest, brushing the bloody petals from your lips with trembling fingers. "It’s okay, it’s okay, you’ll be fine. Just hold on for me, please! I’ll fix this, I’ll save you, just stay, don’t you dare leave me!"

The door burst open, Kakushi flooding in, their faces paling at the scene. Kanao’s wide, stricken eyes locked with Shinobu’s, but Shinobu barked through her tears:

"Prepare the surgery room! NOW! Aoi, sterilize everything— Kanao, get her breathing steady! MOVE!"

They obeyed without question.

Hours bled together in a haze of crimson and petals. Shinobu’s hands never stopped moving—pressing, stitching, purging, cutting, praying. Her muscles screamed, her fingers cramped, her skin burned raw, but she did not stop. Her lips moved ceaselessly, whispering frantic mantras— stay, please stay, don’t leave me too.

Not until Aoi seized her wrist, sobbing, begging her to stop. "Shinobu-sama! Please.. stop! She’s gone already. She’s gone!"

Shinobu’s world stopped.

Her eyes dropped to your still face, framed by blood and wilted petals. Her hands went limp. "No," she whispered, voice hollow, shaking. "No, she isn’t. She can’t be. Not her." Tears poured down her cheeks unchecked. "Not again. Not her. Please, gods, not her too—"

It took three Kakushi to pry her off the table, her hoarse screams filling the air until the sedative dragged her under. Even as she slipped into unconsciousness, her hands clawed weakly toward yours, reaching for a warmth that was already gone.

-

When she woke, the silence was unbearable.

The empty futon beside her weighed heavier than anything.

Shinobu sat up slowly, her body trembling, her mind stuck in a loop of your final words, your laughter, your blood. She wanted to cry, but there was nothing left. Only emptiness.

Until.

Her chest tightened suddenly, violently. A sharp burn seared her throat. She coughed hard, eyes wide—

And when she pulled her hand away from her lips, a single [f/c] petal lay trembling in her palm.

The morning dawned reluctantly, as if the sun itself was too weighed down by sorrow to fully rise. Inside, the normally hearty Estate felt cold and unwelcoming, its usual warmth stripped away and laid bare and cold with the rain outside showing no signs of subsiding, each drop being a reminder of the relentless sorrow that seem to mark itself on the Butterfly Estate residents.

It has been a few days since Kochou Kanae's funeral.

Everyone was deeply devastated by the sudden news that spread, the kind and strong Flower Hashira fatally injured by an Upper Moon Demon. Shinobu, her own blood-related little sister, being the one to cruelly stumble across her in an ill fated timing.

You weren’t unfamiliar with death—far from it actually. You had seen corpses torn apart in the field by claws, bodies reduced to nothing but unrecognizable remnants due to the demon's blood art. You had learned to steel yourself against grief because mourning was pointless. The world did not stop for a dead body.

And yet you still couldn't stop the feeling of the painful shudder that rang violently in your spine, and the heat that left your stomach, crawling upwards your eyes. You quietly trembled when you watched the group of crying Kakushis slowly walking into the mansion, lifting the body of the person you've grown to respect most, with her striking familiar yet covered in red hue butterfly haori peeking out of the white cloth.

You wish you could forget it all.

And currently, you tightly embraced the girls that sobbed in your arms. Your heart tightening at each hiccup that left their mouths.

All of them grieved in their own way, Kanao sweating profusely as you reassured and hugged her trembling form. Aoi, in a bit of denial, distracting herself by the endless chores that seem to add up each passing day. The kids, Sumi, Kiyo, and Naho. Being so young, they cried all day and night as you carefully cradled them until they surrendered to drowsiness and exhaustion. You would be the one to tuck them to bed before your mind wanders towards the person you were worried the most.

Shinobu had been locking herself inside her office.

Your heart longed to comfort your best friend, be a pillar she had always been towards you as you know she's the one suffering the most, you know just how much she treasures her sister and the devastation she felt must be immeasurable.

With that in mind, you walked towards her work office, faintly hearing the clanks of glass and light stomps of feet before raising your hand to knock. You pause when a harsh noise becomes audible, a sob breaking the short silence that followed as you instantly feel your heart drop.

Immediately, you tore the door open and took in the sight of Shinobu tightly clutching a familiar haori that she held in her hands in the middle of the cluttered space, tears flowing out of her reddened eyes and you could feel your own water. "Shino..!"

She looked up at you tiredly and you bit your lip to stop it from further trembling. Slowly, you kneeled in front of her, your hand hovering above her, avoiding possibly startling her. Shinobu looked absolutely broken as another sob left her mouth. Without any second thought, she tightly pulled you in an embrace the moment you were close enough.

"[Name].. she, how could- I.. I could've..!"

You tightened your hold on her, slightly rocking as you whispered reassurances in her ear. Reassurances you know are utter bullshit. Nothing was going to bring back Kanae, bring back the warmth of the estate, bring back the happiness you all had. And yet your lips whispered more like a sinner would.

This was the first time you had ever glimpsed this side of Shinobu, seeing the raw grief and anger she had been harboring these past days. Hopelessness and guilt rang loudly in you, not too different from Shinobu who clutched tightly on your back with loud and angry weeps leaving from her.

You could feel your shoulder damp yet didn't bother to care too much for it, simply rubbing circles on her back in an attempt to comfort her. "Shinobu, It'll be fine, It'll be all fine, okay?"

Suddenly, Shinobu pulled away from your embrace, her face twisted into a sour expression as she glared at you, you didn't find it a bit intimidating as the tears still flowed nonstop alonside her occasional hiccups. You held a palm against her cheek in which she leaned closer to.

"It won't just be okay! You, out of all people, should know that!"

You bit your lip, before Shinobu continued. "I can't- I can't do this on my own-"

"You won't," You cut in, determined. "We will be here for you, I will be beside you, Shinobu."

Shinobu sniffs, gritting her teeth. "I just- There's so many things needed to be done and I just can't, can't possibly do everything at once!"

You pulled her in, and like a magnet, she clung to your body as if you were her lifeline. Her grip was tight and desperate. Gently, you rubbed her shoulders, trying to offer even just a bit comfort, "You don't need to do everything at once, we could take baby steps, one at a time, remember?"

With time, her sobs slowly subsided as you continue to slightly rock both of your bodies tangled with each other. You hear her inhale and let out a shuddering breath before leaving your embrace.

You stare as Shinobu looked down at Kanae's Haori, tightly holding and gripping the fabric. So much emotions flashed on her face. Anguish, grief, regret— too much to take in.

"I'm not Kanae." She whispered eerly.

You gulp, slowly taking her whitening and trembling fists on your own.

"I'm not Kanae, [Name]!" Shinobu looked up at you with another set of tears threatening to shed, her lip trembling and the once confident purple eyes you've sometimes lost yourself into, now looked so dull and beaten.

You don’t remember much of what happened that night. The events blurred together in a haze of exhaustion and grief, becoming a tangled mess in your memory. When you finally awoke, Shinobu was beside you, her usually composed appearance disheveled. Her hair was in disarray, and her brows were deeply furrowed even in sleep.

The agony of losing your mentor weighed heavily on your heart, a constant ache that you couldn't escape. As a demon slayer, you had pledged to fight against these vicious demons and is aware of just how much destruction they could truly do towards people yet the brutal reality was far grimmer than you anticipated.

You took a deep breath, blinking the tears that blurred your sight as you tear your gaze towards Shinobu. If you were feeling this much already, how heavy would the weight of responsibility be pressing down on her? Although, you admired her as she was someone headstrong and brave, even the strongest people had their limitations and the evening before was a proof of such.

You want to become the anchor she was once towards you. Help her through her struggles, just how she saved you from getting yourself killed in the Final Selection without a second thought. After all, she could've left you bleeding and heaving towards your demise in an absolute pathetic state and yet she didn't.

She didn't.

And with a final soft exhale, you slowly stood up from your place and gently picked up the sleeping girl, who immediately curled herself once you placed her on her office bed.

You made your way towards the door with deliberate and steady steps, silently closing the door behind you before a small smile slowly stretched your lips.

-

As her eyelids began to struggle open, Shinobu felt the weight of exhaustion pressed against her skull.

And for a moment, she could barely recall where she was.

The dim glow of the morning showed itself through the open windows, showing another day to be awoken to. She blinked, her lashes sticky from dried tears, with the silence around her feeling painful and suffocating.

No different from the previous days she felt after her sister's sudden passing.

As the memory resurfaced, the realization landed like a hammer to her chest, knocking the air from her lungs. A sharp gasp escaped her lips as she clenched her fists into the fabric beneath her. Kanae's whispers were small and barely audible yet it clung and stung as if her chest was ripped wide open at that very moment.

The memory was vivid, unrelenting—like it had only happened minutes ago.

Blood.

It was everywhere. The deep crimson soaked through Kanae’s butterfly haori before landing on Shinobu's own clothes as she clung tightly to her sister. The once gentle, smiling face was marred by pain, blood seeped out of her sister's mouth as the suffocating iron like scent scattered throughout the air.

Shinobu had dropped to her knees, hands shaking violently as she pressed against the deep wound in her sister’s abdomen. She didn’t even register the hot tears spilling down her cheeks, didn’t even hear her own desperate pleas.

"No, no, no! Nee-san I'll—Just, just hold on! You’re going to be fine, I swear! We just, we just have to stop the bleeding—"

A choked sob tore through Shinobu’s throat as she frantically tried to mend what was beyond saving. And from there point on, it was all a blur— Or she fools herself to be.

The Kakushi arrived too late. They tried to pull her away, but she fought, clawing at the ground to stay by Kanae’s side. Even as her sister’s body was carefully lifted and carried away, Shinobu could only reach out with bloodstained fingers, her screams raw and strangled.

Shinobu squeezes her eyes shut, nails digging into her palms so harshly she felt them sting.

A sharp slap against her cheek snapped her back.

This was enough grieving. Enough brooding. Enough of her pathetic behavior.

She had wailed for days on end. Break as if this would bring back Kanae's soul. Be immature of her older sister's passing.

But now, the world is still turning. The demons never stopped their destruction. The patients never constantly healed on their own. The time continued on moving—and she was expected to move along it.

She exhaled shakily, sitting up. The room was in disarray. Papers littered the floor, glass vials knocked over, ink stains smeared across her desk—proof of her unraveling.

For a long moment, she simply sat there, staring at nothing and everything.

Then, with quiet deliberation, she swung her legs over the side of the bed and stood. Her limbs felt heavy, her body weighed down as if the grief itself had settled into her very bones. But she forced herself forward.

'Nee-san..'

---

The moment Shinobu stepped out of her office, something felt… off.

The estate was quiet, yet there was something unnatural in the air—one that didn’t belong. One that felt uncanny and eerie.

Then she heard it.

Laughter.

Not the soft, tired chuckles of those trying to heal, but a bright, full-bodied giggle. It rang through the halls like a melody, cheerful and warm. A sound she hadn’t expected to hear so soon. A sound that sent shivers through her spine.

Her brow furrowed as she curved a corner, stomping towards the familiar hallway.

The dining area was bustling, yet the atmosphere was something you could've expected. Grief still clung to the walls, to the people in it. Kanao sat stiffly at the table, her hands curled into loose fists in her lap, staring blankly at the bowl of rice before her. Aoi stood by the doorway, arms crossed, her expression in a tense scowl. The three younger girls, Sumi, Kiyo, and Naho, had their red-rimmed eyes fixed on the figure bustling around the room.

And at the center of it all was [Name].

You moved gracefully between the tables, setting down plates with an exaggerated flourish. Your voice was light, teasing, as you softly nudged Aoi toward a seat with a smile.

"You’ve been working too much, Aoi. Come, come, sit! You ought to try this soup. It's good for growing kids like you girls!"

Aoi frowned, staring at you as if you had grown a second head. "You don’t cook."

You giggled, a bright, ringing sound that made Shinobu’s stomach twist uncomfortably. "Well, there’s a first time for everything."

You turned next to Kanao, oblivious to the new figure that stood and stared at your act. Your voice softens as you pat Kanao's hair.

"Eat up, Nao. You need to keep your strength up."

Kanao blinked slowly, as if trying to understand the words. After a few seconds of silence, she slowly retrieved the heavy coin in her pocket. The one that Kanae had preciously gifted to her. You bit your lips as she took a shaky breath before successfully flipping the coin in her hands.

Her lips barely parted, voice hoarse from days of silence. "I’m.. not hungry."

Your smile faltered for the briefest second before you reached out, gently placing a piece of Unagi onto Kanao’s rice.

"I understand but you need to eat properly to keep yourself healthy, okay? Even just one bite is plenty."

Kanao hesitated, staring at the food, then at you. Something flickered in her dull eyes, and not long after, slowly, with stiff movements, she lifted her chopsticks and took a small bite.

Your grin widened as if Kanao had just won a battle. Perhaps she did.

"There you go, I'm proud of you Nao! It’s good, right?"

Shinobu’s fingers twitched.

Something about the scene made her deeply uneasy.

The exaggerated joy. The forced lightness in your voice. The way your hands trembled ever so slightly when you thought no one was looking. Your trembling lips as the younger girls, Kiyo, Sumi, and Naho, looking up at you with a conflicted expression.

You were trying too hard to be there for everyone.

And Shinobu hated it.

---

This pattern continued.

Day after day, you filled the Butterfly Estate with their endless soft energy, tirelessly caring for the others. You helped in the infirmary, giggling as you changed bandages. You cooked meals, telling jokes as you stirred the soup, the only meal you could pathetically prepare. You played with the children, twirling them around as if nothing in the world was wrong.

But Shinobu was no fool.

You were caring, indeed— But not in a cheerfully smiling way. Not laughing as you endlessly chatter towards the patients kind of way. Not in a forced exertion of energy kind of way. No, you were reserved and cold. Your lips pursed as you barely answer to people's inquiries. An awkward grunt when you're in a tight spot. A pair of observing eyes silently and keenly supervising over everyone else.

You weren't the radiant sun— seemingly filling up the room with your passionate enthusiasm. No, to Shinobu, you were the comforting moon that hovered over everyone when they needed it the most. When the darkness engulfed the surroundings, you were the one shielding them from the unknown.

And she had enough of your unnatural behavior.

---

The soft murmur of voices cut through the evening air, accompanied by the occasional burst of giggles that rang like wind chimes in the night. The engawa was bathed in the dim glow of paper lanterns, casting long shadows that danced gently across the wooden panels. The cool breeze carried the scent of damp earth and faint traces of the floral plants that you can occasionally spot from each corner of the garden.

Shinobu paused mid-step at the sight of you, fingers curling slightly at her sides.

Sitting cross-legged on the wooden porch, the three youngest residents of the Butterfly Estate nestled close to your side. Kiyo leaned against your shoulder, her small fingers absentmindedly fidgeting with the loose thread of your sleeve. Sumi had her arms wrapped around her knees, chin resting atop them as she gazed up at you with wide, eager eyes. Naho sat just a bit apart, but her expression betrayed how much she was hanging onto every word that left your lips.

Your voice, so steady and warm, cut through the night like a lullaby.

"..And then—then the old man huffed and took the mean man by the arm and proceeded to slam him against the table! He really didn't need my help! Can you believe it?"

The three girls let out a chorus of laughter, their tired faces momentarily brightened by childish amusement. This sight should've normally warmed Shinobu's chest, no matter how much she may deny it. Instead, however she felt something gnaw at her insides.

It was clear in the way your shoulders tensed, the way your fingers twitched as you smoothed over Kiyo’s hair. The way your laughter rang hollow at the edges with lips curved into a smile that never quite reached your eyes.

This wasn’t you.

Not at all.

The moment the girls' laughter died down into sleepy murmurs, Shinobu took a deliberate step forward. Her presence made the children perk up but they quickly deflated at her next words.

"It's getting late," Shinobu said, her voice light but firm. "You three should get some rest."

Naho blinked up at her, still drowsy from the warmth of the evening. "But—"

"Goodnight." Shinobu pressed, her lips forming a small, tight smile.

There was a hesitation, a moment where Kiyo glanced up at you as if seeking permission.

You gave her a gentle pat on the back. "Come on now, listen to your Shinobu nee-chan. You’ve all had a long day."

Reluctantly, they obeyed. With murmured goodnights and small yawns, the three girls trudged off, leaving the engawa wrapped in silence once more.

Shinobu let it linger. Let the weight of the quiet settle in. Let the moment stretch until she finally turned her attention fully to you.

You, who were still stiffly sitting there, stared out into the moonlit courtyard.

"So," she began slowly, stepping closer. "How long do you plan to keep this up?"

You blinked as if pulled from a trance, tilting your head toward her with a bemused smile. "What do you mean?"

Shinobu’s lips pressed into a thin line.

"Don’t play dumb."

You let out a light chuckle, rubbing the back of your neck as your eyes wandered away from hers. "I really don’t know what you’re talking about, Shinobu."

The sound of her name from your lips, so casual, so teasing, made her hands curl into fists.

She exhaled through her nose, trying to steady herself. "You’ve been exerting yourself," she stated plainly, watching for your reaction. "Running around, forcing yourself to smile, to laugh, to take care of everyone else while pretending nothing is wrong."

Your expression didn’t change, but your fingers twitched ever so slightly.

"I'm just doing what I can to help," You replied casually, giving her a small shrug. "Is that really such a bad thing?"

Shinobu’s eyes darkened.

"It is when you’re lying to yourself."

You let out a shaky chuckle, shaking your head. "Shino, really—"

"Why are you doing this?"

The question was sharp, cutting through the tense air between you two.

You purse your lips, still acting oblivious to her implications. "Doing what?"

"This." She gestured at you, frustration clearly bubbling. "This ridiculous performance. Acting like everything is fine when we both know it’s not."

Your resolve, however, didn't waver. "I just want to make things easier for everyone."

A muscle in Shinobu’s jaw tensed. "By pretending?"

"By helping." you corrected, voice still infuriatingly chirpy.

And that was it.

That was the final thread as Shinobu snapped.

"Why are you trying so hard to be compassionate all of a sudden?!" The words came out harsher than she intended, her voice laced with something raw and desperate. "It’s fucking pathetic! You’re being pathetic! And I—I…"

Her breath hitched.

Your eyes, so impossibly gentle, met hers.

Slowly, deliberately, you reached out and took her hand.

Her fingers twitched at the warmth of your touch.

"Shinobu," you murmured.

"I just— I just don't get it why are you acting like this?"

You hum, and replied as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Someone has to fill your role of caring for everyone, you know?"

Shinobu trembled.

The anger in her veins bled into something heavier, something that settled deep into her chest like an unbearable weight. Her shoulders shook, her breath coming out in small, uneven gasps.

You didn’t say anything more, didn’t try to fix anything or offer empty words of comfort. You simply held onto her hand.

Shinobu let out a shuddering sob, her free hand coming up to cover her mouth as if that alone could stop the flood and it couldn't.

Tears spilled freely, trailing down her cheeks as she crumbled.

She buried herself into the warmth of your embrace, fingers clutching onto the fabric of your clothing as if afraid you would disappear.

You didn’t.

After what felt like an eternity, she managed to choke out a single, broken whisper.

"Y-You’re so stupid."

You softly exhale, stroking her hair in slow, soothing motions. Your chirpy persona seemingly melting away into the air and finally, it felt like Shinobu was actually talking to you. And not some pitiful performer.

"I know."

And in that moment, grief did not feel so unbearably lonely.

"Finally!"

You squished the demon's remaining ashes under your feet, successfully extinguishing whatever profanities it managed to scream at you. Not bothering to listen to any of them. You're just glad that after a week of overstaying yourself in this village, you've finally gotten rid of the reason you were here in the first place.

It wasn't a strong opponent by any chance but it sure was tricky and cunning. Using ways that even you, who usually just go for the head, think of your actions more deeply. After all, one mistake could lead to a terrifying massacre.

But you waved all of that away. You managed to slay the demon and save people in the process, that's important.

After a while of receiving the countless grateful thank yous, you passed everything else to the Kakushis that had recently arrived with a nod.

"Ame."

Your crow perches on your shoulder and you smile, patting her ruffled feathers as she caws loudly. "Rest! Rest! Rest!"

You chuckle, "Alright, I got it."

Your thoughts wander as you walk towards the direction your crow was guiding you. Warmth settled on your stomach when you realized the familiar pavement and purposely stationed planted flowers as well as the occasional flutter and waves of butterflies.

'Ah.' You fully relax your body, seemingly melting from the warmth on your face alone. You cannot deny that you've longed so much from your family and most of all, from your lover.

It was an unexpected development, you could admit. From close co-workers to friends and then something more. Shinobu captivated you in more ways imaginable and possible. So, imagine the loneliness that clouded you every day that you were away. Being a Hashira as well as her, duties were indeed more important. But sometimes you wish you could be selfish for once and stay one more day with her, free of any worries outside normal, mundane concerns.

Alas, duty calls and you had to be away for two whole months! Countless missions left and right, your recent being the longest you've ever had. It was exhausting and mentally taxing waking up and only having comfort from the frequently exchanged letters sent by the girls and Shinobu before you ready yourself for another night of demon hunting.

Though, you suppose none of those matters now as you stood at the sight of the Butterfly Estate with a tired smile. The sun had already retreated for the day and the bustling mansion was still up and lively, likely nursing after wounded slayers.

You didn't want to possibly distract them so you discreetly went inside and almost immediately bolted towards the work office Shinobu must be working herself on.

You weren't wrong as the clanks and light stomps become audible from behind the thin door.

You widely grinned, you didn't notify any of the girls of your arrival as even you weren't sure when you're free of the duties given towards you. So, you were giddy in your place to surprise Shinobu with your presence.

You raise your arm to knock.

-

Shinobu releases a tired exhale. After the seemingly endless hours stretching on, the beaker she held between her fingers made it entirely worth it. With this specific mixture, she should have a nicely prepared scabbard full of poisonous concoctions of wisteria enough to last a few missions.

'I shouldn't worry for a while.' Shinobu sets the glass aside but momentarily pauses when a knock becomes audible. However, before she could speak, the swish sound of the door harshly sliding enters her ears.

She inwardly sighs, "Aoi-chan, I greatly appreciate your concerns but didn't I-"

"Give the poor girl a break, won't you?"

Shinobu blinks, snapping her head behind. Gaping with widened eyes as your tired state emerged from whatever hell hole you came from.

She eventually snapped out of this quick trance, smirking as you walked closer towards her while she slightly leaned on the table behind. "Oh? Don't tell me you abandoned your missions to visit me? That's sweet but I'm afraid I have to report you to Master~!"

You chuckled, missing her soothing voice yet teasing tone. The two months away truly took so much precious things that you can't help but treasure everything you missed from Shinobu. As you got closer, you immediately pulled her in a tight hug, inhaling the wisteria scent that clung itself onto her and she giggled at your desperate hold.

Feeling you rubbing your head on her neck made Shinobu even giddier, "Now, now. Are you actually coaxing me into not snitching? How cunning of you, my dear."

Already used to this, you didn't mind her teasing behavior. You know just how you could shut Shinobu's mouth and she's well aware of your ability to do so. That in mind, you worked your magic as your hands slowly wandered around her body, while placing small light kisses on her jaw and neck below, grinning at the way she softly sighed as you did so.

Shinobu bit her lip, feeling herself immediately fluster at your touch. She cannot deny she longed so much from you. From your silent touches to the loving gazes. After all, work and research could only do so much to distract her from her aching yearning for you. She's just glad that you're finally free of your duties as much as she is currently too. Tilting her head, she hums at the way your lips last longer on her skin and your palms softly caressing her waist.

"Missed you." You grumbled, leaning away to face her before tilting your head.

"Don't you miss me, too?"

Shinobu chuckles, finding your pleading eyes adorable as she brought a hand to rub your cheek. "Of course I did, my beloved." Her reply easily gets a shy smile from you.

"Good," You sigh, pressing closer towards her again. "..because I missed you so much I could just die."

The Hashira pats your head, loving the way you leaned most of your weight onto her, "Hmmm.. so dramatic."

You completely ignored her words, rather continuing on complaining about your previous missions, grumbling and groaning as if Shinobu was giving attention to everything other than the way you twirled her hair around your finger or the way you lock your jaw the moment you recall something entirely embarrassing or annoying. She could just stare all day and not get tired of doing so.

"..'nobu, Shinobu.. are you listening to me?" She hums, licking her lips and bringing her eyes back and up to your own with a sly grin.

"Something about demons, yes?"

Yep, she wasn't listening. You shook your head. "Well, that's all from me, how about you? I trust that you've been taking care of yourself?"

Shinobu visibly beamed, "Of course, I have-!"

"Don't even lie."

You immediately deadpanned. "You have a futon in here, which you only bring out if you spent a few nights here again. And don't think I didn't notice your cold and untouched dinner set aside either."

Her smile tensed, her head tilting as her purple eyes seemed to glint with a single brow raised. "Well, what's the point of asking something you're already aware of?"

You roll your eyes, "I wanted to test you," You shrug, leaning away from her touch. "I guess you failed."

Shinobu didn't even let a single second pass without her arms tangled around your neck as she immediately pulled you in, her smirk widening.

"Don't think I would let you escape that fast~"

You giggle, easily balancing the two of you as you give her a short kiss. "I'd be saddened if you did." You give her hips a small squeeze, "After all, I wouldn't dream of letting you go."

She huffs in amusement, "My, what a sweet talker you are."

"Says you."

Shinobu laughs, slowly pushing you towards the conventionally placed futon on the side. The two of you immediately cling onto each other, with you burying your head on Shinobu's neck while she lovingly caress your hair, the warm blanket sat above you two.

Pure small moments like these, seemingly ordinary yet profoundly precious, are what Shinobu cherishes the most. Nothing else but love and care radiating from the two of you. How she wishes time could stop and stretch on endlessly just for the two of you to spend time together.

You soon break the long and comfortable silence. "Take care of yourself, will you? Not just for me but for the girls as well."

You take a small peek at her, pouting at the way Shinobu simply smirks with her eyes closed, your words seemingly entering and leaving one ear to another.

"I mean it, Shinobu. Don't push yourself too hard, you deserve a break too."

She sharply exhaled yet the smile plastered on her lips softened hearing your words and you snicker seeing it. You know she secretly likes being taken care well. Although, you doubt she'll agree hearing it.

You return to your supposed location, deep down her nape once again with a satisfied smile. The warmth in your stomach increasingly grows, content being beside your lover like this.

"I love you."

Shinobu feels the heat creep up her face and ears, her heart tug felt painful yet she loved every single beat of it because she knows it's all because of you. You always make her feel like she's floating, always without a single fail. And at that moment, she feels all the strain for the past weeks leave her body as her comfort fully and rightfully embraced her.

Words could never capture the actuality of her feelings and yet it easily left her mouth anyways.

"I love you too."

As she always had and always will.

shinobu secretly liking being taken care of is so so canon to me that i jst had to mention it as a small detail idk why

"Okay, can you stop that?!"

You sigh for possibly the 5th time this day and Aoi has had enough of your antics.

For the whole morning you've been gloomy, broody and absolutely pathetic, a stark contrast to your usual chirpy, mostly childish demeanor. She already does have an inkling of what could be likely upsetting you.. Well, more like who because there's only one person who could retract that much of a reaction from you.

Usually, she could not care less. Your relationship with Shinobu was not her business and never will be, she hopes. Rolling eyes thrown towards your direction when the two of you are acting unprofessional in front of patients, sure, that has happened and probably will more. But this? If she had to sit through your pathetic and absolutely not subtle way of sulking, she might just confront Shinobu herself.

Aoi pinches you and you recoil, snapping out of your trance before you eventually start tearing up.

"It's nothing, Aoi-chan.." You blink your blurred sight before looking down.

"It's just.." You bit your lip, "..she's been busy and I miss her, that's all."

The romantic development between you and Shinobu wasn't easy at all, never will be, you lament. She was a Hashira, a position many admired including yourself. They had many duties to attend to. Either slaying demons or patrolling in their supposed location. Not to mention the added work on your girlfriend, who had the proud title of the saviour doctor of the Demon Slayer Corps. Perhaps this was what attracted you the most.

She was selfless, caring, and endlessly talented. Catering to many, tending to their injuries and slaying demons along the way, all that with such a pretty smile. You've long accepted that there will be no such thing as endless peaceful days between the two of you as lovers. There will always be circumstances that need Shinobu and her limited attention.

But sometimes, you wish you could be selfish for once.

Make time pause or maybe just slower, so you could enjoy the moments you have with her and heal the longing you had in your heart. Wake up in the mornings with boring, mundane worries such as what to cook for your family, or how to stop Shinobu from being flirty in front of the girls. Not— worrying if you could see your lover be alive for another day after a hectic time at demon slaying work.

"You stupid girl, have you even talked about it with Shinobu-sama?"

You shrink in your place, silent.

Aoi shakes her head, scowling at you. "Well, you should! You should know by now that Shinobu-sama cares for you and would want you to open up rather than doing whatever it is you're doing!"

She takes the mountain of clothing on your side and glares at you. "So, go ahead and talk to her now!"

You flinch, heart tugging at her words. "Wha-what!? Now!? Aoi-chan, don't be ridiculous! With the amount of injured slayers this month, she's barely functioning as it is! No way, that's too much!"

Aoi rolls her eyes, "Fine!" She gives you an accusing point of her finger.

"But you better talk to her soon about it, okay!? Now, help me with these and quit sulking as well!"

"Ye-Yes!"

Aoi, as harsh her words are, she's a good kid you're glad to have as your family.

-

Aoi's words has stuck itself in your mind the whole day you did chores alongside the other girls and it wasn't long before night fell and you gathered the courage to talk to her.

As you heard a muffled, audible "Come in." You slid the door open and inhaled at the sight of Shinobu Kocho, in all her glory. She's still wearing her uniform despite it being already late into the night, she must have been too busy to change again.

You smile as you catch her eye, setting her warm dinner on her work table.

"Hey, beloved. I heated up your dinner."

She smiles at you and gives you a grateful nod. "I appreciate that, thank you."

You hum as you stood behind her, arms sneakily slithering around her head in a playful manner, lightly hugging her head from behind. You grin at the blush coating her cheeks.

"You've been here for so long. Why not take a break already after you finish dinner?" With me.

Shinobu seem to give it a thought, before glancing at the piling paperworks. She lightly grimace and you frown when she shook her head apologetically.

"Sorry, beloved." She spins around to give you a short kiss. "As much as I want to, I need some of these done tonight."

You nod grimly, trying to not make your disappointment obvious. "I understand, but don't you go overworking yourself, okay?"

Shinobu, who had always been good at reading you like an open book, caught on easily. She takes your cheek, caressing it with her thumb. You close your eyes, hand bringing up itself to clasp with her own. You take in the familiar aroma of wisteria that had always lingered itself around the woman and seem to ingulf you in her work office.

"[Name].. you can always talk to me about what's on your mind, okay?"

As usual, your composure easily crumbled under her intense gaze. Your shoulders drop and Shinobu stops the urge to coo at your protruding bottom lip.

"It's been lonely without you.."

Shinobu sighs, taking you in a warm embrace. She hears you sniff and her heart painfully tugs. Just as much as you, she's longed long for your presence as well. Wanting nothing more but to bask in the warmth and love you've always provided for her.

Alas, duty calls and instead she has to disconsolately spend her time away from you, who's usually busy with other chores as well.

Suddenly, your arms around her waist tighten as you rub your head further down her neck. Shinobu feels the bubble of laughter pop out, chuckling while stroking your flushed nape.

"You've missed me so much, huh?"

You groan, burying yourself even more. "Of course I do, Shino! I wanna cuddle with you so bad but you're always away.. it's so lonely!"

Shinobu pats your head sympathetically, "I'm truly sorry, [Name]. Y'know if you keep this cute act up, I might just ditch these and kiss you till sunrise."

You immediately recoiled from her touch, face flushed at the absurdity of her words. "Shinobu! That's too harsh! These paperworks are important for a reason!"

She weakly smiles at your words, well aren't you just confusing? She means that as lovingly as possible before giving up and teasingly gives your cheek a kiss. "Hm, you're right.. I'll continue.." She looks up at you expectingly and you redden more at the sight of her battling eyelashes.

"..with some motivation, perhaps?" You groan at her teasing tone, pushing her away and Shinobu simply giggles.

"But I know what might help you, [Name], sweets."

You hum, playing with her fingers and leaning onto her. "Help with what?"

"Your loneliness silly. I'm thinking of.. a friend maybe? I've seen that you.. don't really interact with anyone else other than the girls. That's not a good habit now, is it? You'll be totally friendless, [Name]~!"

You pout at her but nodded. She's right. Looking back, when you just started demon slaying, you preferred to keep things to yourself. Even Shinobu took time to fully invite you in her estate and become one with the family. After all, friendship was intimidating for you, especially in this kind of workplace where death is often the leading reason of friends separating.

The possibility of you having a friend outside of the Estate wasn't unappealing. Not at all. You guess you just don't know where to start and who to befriend.

As if reading your thoughts, Shinobu smiles and leans closer to your ear. Her warm breath worsens the red state of your skin. "Actually, I know someone you might get along with."

You perk up, tilting your head as you catch her purple tinted eyes. "Oh, really?"

Shinobu nodded, "Yes! Actually, they're a very open-minded individual. You'll get along just fine!"

Your eyes seem to sparkle and Shinobu giggles at this. "Okay, who is it? Can you introduce me to them?"

You blinked when your lover shook her head, the familiar grin stretching her lips easily inducing a whine from you.

"Shinobu..!!"

"Uh-uh," She takes your hand and brings it to her lips, trailing soft kisses on your flushed skin.

"You have to befriend them your own, I'm afraid. You need to be sociable, after all!"

You groan, leaning most your weight as you melt like a puddle beside her. "Ehh, but it would be easier-"

"Nope!" Shinobu chirps out and you sulk more.

She smiles and takes you by the cheeks, causing you to look back at her. "Just be yourself, okay? I'm sure the moment you two meet, you'll instantly gain a new friend!"

You sigh, tilting your head onto her hand. "Fine," You stare at her and her smile widens. "But in return, you gotta reserve some of your time for me okay?"

She chuckles at your cheeky words and nods, "Of course, I would want nothing more, my beloved."

-

You walk around the Butterfly Estate, visibly giddy on your feet.

Just not too long ago, you've finally finished all your assigned tasks! Although, double checking the patients was a bit difficult to do, since that roudy trio had invaded the rather peaceful environment of the mansion. Especially and specifically the two slayers, you grumble under your breath.

You've heard of these three, it seems that they occasionally get injured in missions a lot and it always happens when you're away. It wasn't a very good first impression, you concluded.

Actually it was a rather baffling situation to be in, in which one was asking for your hand in marriage despite your many endless attempts of saying that you've been spoken for. While, the other was as annoying as the former, firm on demanding a fight and trying to headbutt you. If it wasn't for the unbelievably patient third guy, you would've suffocated each of them, courtesy by their own pillow.

Either way, you're glad that was over. Thankfully, Aoi was there to save you and threaten them with no lunch, that seems to quickly shut the three up.

You hum a fun tune, thinking of ways you could somehow slither your way in Shinobu's lab, silently giggling at your thoughts.

Speaking of Shinobu, she was still pretty adamant on keeping the mystery person she told you about three weeks ago a secret. Simply waving your attempts of knowing more with a, "They'll visit soon!"

Heck, even the softest kisses wouldn't crumble her composure like it usually does. Gosh, that woman! She's so dreamy you might melt! You thought to yourself as you giggle more.

Although, slips still happened and you slowly knew more about your future friend. You assume they're a Hashira like her. Based on Shinobu's words, they often work together, that basically confirms it. And is in Shinobu's list of close friends as well. They also visit often and get along well with everyone!

You were pretty excited to meet them, they seemed fun to be around. Maybe they'll distract your simple mind for a while until you can't handle it anymore and scratch Shinobu's door until she stops working.

You really hope your desperation won't come to that point, fingers crossed.

You were fully immersed in your thoughts, occasionally chuckling by yourself. Well, until you swerved a corner and suddenly planted face first on something.

Or, wait.. someone?

"Oh, sorry."

You blink, taking a step back as the stranger spoke with a monotone voice. You bowed your head quickly, "I'm sorry for bumping you, sir!"

The man, who was notably a slayer like you was wearing a two-tone haori. One burgundy, the other yellow green with a unique pattern, with blue eyes and black hair tied up to a ponytail. He simply nod once and cleared his throat.

"It's fine."

You both silently stand still, facing each other and you sweat profusely under his intense gaze- or rather his blank one?

Seeing the man having no intention to move whatsoever, you cough to interrupt the silence. "So, uhm.. are you injured, just visiting.. orr??"

Seeing you tilt your head, the man blinks. "Ah," He slowly raises his arm and you suppress the urge to facepalm seeing the terribly bandaged bloody hand. How did you not notice that.

Immediately, you tell him to follow you and he does. You lead him into one of the more quiet rooms and gestures for him to take a seat. He silently did so and you secretly grimaced at the loud silence.

"So, uh.." You gulp, trying to see if smalltalk would work.

"You come here often?"

He blinks at you as your fingers did a quick work on his hand, untying the previous bloodied bandages.

"Sometimes."

You awkwardly give him a glance as he plainly replies, before you nervously chuckle.

"Right, so did this bad cut come from a mission?"

You look down at the wound and it wasn't exactly a very bad cut. It was thankfully only a bit deep and only seem to bleed a lot due to the poorly done wrapping. Still, your mouth involuntarily said so and the man didn't seem to really care much.

As blank as ever he replies, "Training. The wooden sword was a hassle."

You nod, taking the newly set bandages you set aside and started to wrap it around the cut after you thoroughly cleaned it. "Oh, yeah. Pretty relatable. I often get small splinters too, Shinobu always teases me for it. " You smile at the memory of her giggling at your misery while taking her time to slowly pick out the small wood on your skin.

You hear him huff, as if suddenly annoyed. You were confused but chose to focus on your current work. With quick precision, you softly tightened the white material and hum as you straightened yourself, facing the black haired man with a polite smile.

"Alright, that's all! Although, you need to come by often to get these regularly changed." You put away the previous bandages before continuing, watching him eye his hand. "Then, I'll give you a small cream which will help with the irritation afterwards."

He gives you a slow nod, "Thank you, I appreciate it."

Your smile widens and suddenly Shinobu's words enters your mind. Hey, isn't this a good opportunity to befriend someone? The guy looks nice, not one for conversations but you don't mind it! With a new objective in mind, you happily reply. "No problem! I'm [Name], by the way!"

He went silent for a few seconds, enough seconds for your heart to tug and for you to quickly regret saying anything.

"Tomioka Giyuu."

The man, now named Giyuu in your head replies. You nod, happy to get his name but your mind suddenly blanked in realization, the name suddenly being familiar to you.

Tomioka.. Giyuu? As in.. Water Hashira Giyuu?

Your eyes almost plucked out itself recognizing his name. Instantly, your gaze settles itself on his uniform and eyes widened even more seeing his golden buttons. In actuality, he is that Giyuu!

In a state of panic, you quickly bow your head. "Hashira-sama! I-I wasn't aware, I apologize!"

Giyuu was quick to be caught off guard by your sudden change. He stiffly sat still as you continued to deeply bow your head.

"Uhm.."

Finally, you straightened yourself to face him. "Uh, oh! Right, I'll get you a personal room..!"

The man sweatdrops and quickly interrupts you. "That won't be necessary, I'll be leaving soon."

You purse your lips, "Well, If you insist.."

How unlucky! To think the person you bumped into was a Hashira! Thankfully, it wasn't the Serpent Hashira or worse! The Wind! Those two didn't have the best reputation, especially with lower ranks. Although, you know Shinobu will quickly be by your side, you'd rather not get into that kind of situation.

As your lover easily resurface herself in your thoughts, you were quick to relax on your place. Seriously, you're grateful it was Giyuu who you met. What a nice pal.

Wait.

Wait...

A Hashira? Someone you could easily get along? Possibly friends with Shinobu?

"U-Uhm!" You, once again, break the silence making Tomioka look away from his hand, facing you with a small tilt of his head, indicating for you to go ahead.

"Do you.. happen to be close with Kocho Shinobu?"

Hearing her name, Giyuu visibly deadpans but you were too busy staring with sparkling eyes. He looks away and shifted around his seat in discomfort.

"Yes." Was his short reply and your eyes only shines more. He furrows his brows in confusion.

Meanwhile, you were inwardly celebrating. Thoughts all over the place. What an amazing coincidence! The Hashira you accidentally face planted into was Shinobu's mystery friend in the end! Isn't this practically a good sign that the two of you will be good friends after all? As always, Shinobu's right!

Giyuu instantly jolts when you took his hand, shaking it rapidly with a wide smile, "Giyuu-san!"

"Uhm, what is it?"

"Let's be friends, please!"

-

Shinobu breathes out a sigh of relief.

Finally, after the seemingly endless pile of paperwork overflowing around her desk, she has now finished reading over the last one. Just her signature and she'll get her well-deserved break.

And as the pen hovered above the messy sign, she immediately slammed it against the table, breathing out a tired exhale. Shinobu feels an exhausted smile stretch her lips. A week's worth of paperwork, ultimately finished. Unless there's more to come, maybe another order for a set of glass due to the mysterious broken window by the ward, perhaps? Highly likely knowing the current trio residing the estate. Aside from that, nothing else should come in for a whole week.

And she is beyond joyous.

Shinobu stretches her limbs, groaning when her back pops a satisfying muscle. Alright, now that she's free (from paperwork only) for the rest of the week, she contemplates what to do next. Thankfully, she expected this moment and have already requested a break from her demon slaying career. If everything is in order, her work should only consist of being the master of the house and doctor duties.

'Mm..' She looks over her window and sees the bright blue sky and white fluffy clouds hovering over them. 'I suppose it's a bit too early for sleep..'

The Hashira decidedly went out of her office to check on the other residents of the mansion to see if the girls were doing well and particularly, how you've been doing.

To be frank, you've been more distant for the last few days. Well, distant was a bit of a stretch. Shinobu thought while giggling. If she put it bluntly, you weren't as clingy as you usually were. Not that she's complaining since it did help with completing her work but it's just worrying that's all. She's aware though that this must be due to the friend you've gained a few days ago.

Truly, she was proud of you. While you were a friendly creature, often chatting with patients to ease their nerves, it never really went past acquaintances. So, imagine her happiness when you suddenly barged into her office, mindlessly chattering about your new best friend? My, what a surprise it was. Although, she couldn't even comprehend your babbles as you seem to talk faster than she could hear, she's still overjoyed for you.

Did she mention she was also surprised? Shinobu didn't know Mitsuri had already visited the estate. Seriously, that girl is hard to ignore, much less not notice. At the same time, she had to consider that she practically locked herself inside her office so it shouldn't be shocking she didn't hear the usual squeals and shouts echoing around the place.

Either way, she's still happy for you. She's been basically edging you on about your future friendship with the Love Hashira, staying rather vauge on her depiction on the pink haired woman. There were a few close calls but nothing she could easily wave away with a few tender touches.

She grins when the sound of laughter reached her ears, noting it was coming from the rehabilitation room. Maybe training with those troublesome trios?

However, just as she was about to step inside, someone suddenly collided all together onto her.

"Oh! Sorry, Shinobu-sama!" The triplets voiced out apologetically, looking up at her.

"Oh my, be careful girls. What's with the hurry?" Shinobu smiles at them, chuckling at the obvious dampness on their hair and clothes, the bitter aroma of brewed medicine surrounding the three girls.

"Ah, we were-!" Just as Naho was about the explain, your loud laughter suddenly cuts them off and Shinobu blinks when you were basically coughing and crying. She suppress a laugh of her own while the three girls didn't bother and laughed alongside you.

"We're actually just playing around right now! Kanao and Aoi are making lunch so we decided to enjoy ourselves a bit.." She thanks Kiyo for her explanation and was just about to send them off when, "Oh, and we're with Tomioka-sama as well!"

She tilts her head, looking at Naho. "Oh? Tomioka-san is here?"

The triplets nodded, "Yes! He visited earlier."

What a surprise indeed. To think that klutz visited without even bothering on greeting like a normal person should, he will never change, will he? Not very shocking knowing that aloof guy.

She inwardly sighs, letting the girls clean up after themselves and finally entering the room where she found you folded in the middle of the space, body uncontrollably trembling from laughter.

"G-Giyuu, that's- pftahah-!" She couldn't help but grin wider at your current state.

"Having fun, are we?"

You breathed out heavily and looked up before gasping outloud seeing Shinobu, weakly reaching out to her, "'Nobu! Ah- You can't believe what this guy said- pfttt-!" Once again, you fell into a shivering mess, coughing between your laughters.

Shinobu shook her head, walking towards you. She was about to tease your shameless act when she paused in her place, stunned at the sight of the man beside you, usually so reserved and stoic, firm on being by himself yet is currently smiling softly at you as if you've hung the moon and stars.

Suddenly, her chest tightens before an eye unconsciously twitches itself.

You continue to be all sprawled out on the floor, chest heaving and slowly riding out your giggles. Then, you shouted an exhausted cry. "Hah! Gosh, Giyuu! You could've worded that betteraAH-!?"

Both you and Giyuu blink when Shinobu instantly snatched you upright, sight dizzying and air being knocked out of your lungs from the sudden grab. "Mmf-! Shino..Shinobu?"

Her fingers hooked around your waist, chin planting itself on your shoulder as you hear her purr and you flushed almost immediately, especially when you were facing Giyuu who simply deadpans at the two of you.

"U-Uhm!? Sh-Shinobu, why are you..?"

"Hm?" She leans closer to give your cheek a kiss, eyes intentionally locking with Giyuu's before it catches your widened ones. She relishes on the red tint on your skin with a smile resembling that of a cunning cat. "Can't I miss you, my beloved?"

You bashfully looked away, "Well, you, you can but Giyuu is-"

"Oh!" Shinobu smirks. "You were here all along, Tomioka-san? My, I didn't notice! You're basically too plain to see, much less recognize! Now, that's just sad, hm~?"

"Mm." The guy simply hums, lips compressing in a thin line. Shinobu feels a vein popped when he basically ignored her to look at you, who's still as flustered as ever.

"Right, uhm. Me and Giyuu were just-"

Her hold tightens around your waist and you tilt your head in confusion.

"..me and Giyuu were just talking about Tanjiro and the others!"

She raises a brow, "Is that so?" Then she faces Giyuu again. "Well, why don't you go entertain the trio and give my wife and I some alone time, hm? Tomioka-san?"

You jolted, steam leaving your head. "W-Wife!? But we're not married..?"

She giggles and held you closer. "Not yet~!"

"Shinobu!"

You clear your throat, trying to keep yourself upright, quickly failing as Shinobu keeps you tightly in place. "Anyways, that's not how you should treat your close friend, right?"

Shinobu felt the urge to gag, "Friend? Tomioka? Him?" She points at the poor blank guy, who remained entirely unfazed until he realized what you said.

You nodded, "He's the friend you told me about right? You're right, he's really nice to be around!"

Giyuu blinked and tilted his head, "..you see me as your close friend, Kocho?" He was surprised that not one but two people actually became his friend.

Although, he was quick to take it back when Shinobu looked absolutely disgusted behind your back as you obliviously smiled and cheered their so called friendship, entirely missing the obvious hostility radiating from her.

"So, he's the best friend you've been telling me about, beloved?"

You nodded with a grin, "Yup! We've been hanging out these past days!" Your words worsens the brewing distaste in her stomach. If she found Giyuu to be someone she somehow tolerated, that's all gone now.

"Ah, is that so? A few days could hardly compare to our endless time together, right?" You tilt your head in confusion, of couse it was, that shouldn't be a question in the first place.

Shinobu gleefully smirked at the man's direction, "Did you hear that, Tomioka-san? You must be unaware of the years we've been together, huh? You can say you're jealous, it's fine!"

Giyuu rolls his eyes, sighing afterwards, "I don't care."

"Heyy, no need to bottle it up! You'll eventually find someone else, don't worry! You should worry about your lack of decor for now!" She giggles at his clear misery.

This goes on for about 20 minutes. A one-sided conversation full of verbal jabs from Shinobu and an occasional grunt from a tired Tomioka. You stood between them as they banter, growing increasingly confused before restless at the amount mean comments the woman had said that not even you can ignore nor wave as playful.

"See? Now, that's just-"

"Shinobu."

The woman paused, head snapping towards you as you frown at her. You sent Giyuu an apologetic smile, standing up at your place and taking Shinobu with you.

"Giyuu, can we excuse ourselves? I think we'll take lunch first. The trio might eventually come here for their training so you can spend your free time with them." The man blinks and stares as you immediately left the rehabilitation room, dragging an unusual quiet Shinobu.

"..did I do something wrong?"

-

The doctor pursed her lips, had she gone too far with her words? She inwardly sighed and cursed for allowing herself to let her emotions get loose.

In an attempt to stop your sulking state, she pulls you in the opposite direction causing for you to halt.

"[Name]-"

"Shinobu, what was that?" You questioned with furrowed brows. "I know you have tendencies to tease people but that was a bit too much."

The woman stayed silent in her place as you continued, slowly growing agitated. "You were being rude!"

"..was I?"

You scoff at her sarcastic tone, "Yes, Shinobu. I thought you would've stopped at the ninth insult but you didn't!"

You sigh before rubbing your neck,  you didn't wanna cause an argument right now. "I'm sorry for shouting but that was really an inappropriate behavior to show towards our friend."

You placed a hand on her shoulder, rubbing her tense form away. "But I know that you might just be tired, so go rest before we have this talk, okay?"

Before Shinobu could open her mouth, you spun and walked away. Not leaving any time for a counter argument. The woman hissed, brushing her bangs upward in distress.

She really took it too far, huh?

-

You placed your folded sheets aside, thoughts still lingering at your lover who you had been avoiding for two hours now. Although, it felt childish, you were truly upset at how mean she was. Was she not happy that you gained a friend after a while? You tisked, of course she is, you shouldn't think of that.

Letting out an exhale, you stood from your place and walked towards your door, wanting to take a fresh breather on the garden and stare at the koi pond as long as you possibly could.

But as you opened your door, you blinked seeing Shinobu with her arm raised, as if about to knock.

Before you could speak, she pulled you in an embrace. One, in which you almost immediately melted on. Curse muscle memory!

".. I did it, I apologized."

"Huh?" You unintelligently replied. Body as stiff as a rock, leaning most your weight on her.

Her arms around your neck tightened as the woman sighed on your neck.

"I apologized to Tomioka."

"Oh." You stayed silent before a smile slowly crept on your face, arms slithering around her waist as you tightly held onto her like she was your lifeline. She could be and she is.

Shinobu exhaled, almost sounding so lovingly, "Yes, I did." She left the hug to face you, pausing to stare at the goofy smile that stretched her lips with one of her own. "..now stop being mad at me?"

You giggled at her lowkey pleading and cute expression, it was so unusual on her and yet you loved it anyways. You pulled her by the cheeks to lock lips, instantly feeling her smile into the kiss as it slowly deepened.

She pulled away, slightly heaving. "Don't ever do that again." You tilt your head, grin widening.

"Be mad at you?"

"Make me apologize to Tomioka." Shinobu shuddered.

You snorted while Shinobu smiles, caressing your cheek in a way that instantly caused your skin to be tinted red.

"But that too." Again, she pulled you in a soft kiss, one that screamed nothing more but love and adoration you had for each other.

From the start, this is what Shinobu should've done, in order to immediately cease every occuring thoughts of you possibly straying away from her.

And it worked. She thought of nothing else but you and your warm touches as she pushed you further inside your private room and closed the door behind. Giggling at your stunned expression.

"I promised to reserve my time to you, didn't I?"

-

+BONUS SCENE!!

"Ah, is that so, Tomioka-san?" Tanjiro spoke while munching on some crunchy snacks given by the triplets and Aoi. The three of them were just about to start training but when they went inside the room, they were surprised to see Giyuu sitting alone in the middle of the space with nothing other than the table full of watered down medicine in front of him, in which he calmly stared at.

Zenitsu was immediately spooked at how eerie the guy looked when in reality he was just being lonely on his own. Meanwhile, Inosuke was instantly driven to win against him in a tea game and sat on the other side, demanding to fight but went out completely drenched in nasty medicine.

Thankfully, everything calmed down and they sat down together to eat for lunch as Giyuu retells the previous interaction that happened.

"They must have been hungry! Yeah, that must be it!"

Zenitsu sneers, looking smug as if he knew something that they don't. "You're so naive, Tanjiro. It is clear that you just got away between their romance!! Of course guys like you couldn't tell." He spat out some food from his mouth.

Giyuu and Tanjiro tilted their heads in unison and confusion. "Ehh, really?" Tanjiro said.

Inosuke scoffs, "What the fuck is romance?" He roughly shoved the food in his mouth.

Zenitsu huffs, ignoring the disgusting boar and pointing an accusing finger towards the three guys in front of him.

"Look! When two people are in a romantic relationship, they should only focus on each other! You getting in the way would only result to either getting beaten up in a pulp or rejected by the girl!"

Tanjiro pouts, "But Tomioka wasn't aiming for one of them romantically, right?" He looks at Giyuu and the man nods.

Zenitsu simply rolls his eyes, "It doesn't matter! That's why when trying to befriend girls, always check if they have a partner or not! You can't be too sure if their partner is terrifying and scary!"

He remained oblivious to the widened eyes of the other guys in front of him and confidently continued on relying his experiences.

"Especially someone pretty and nice like [Name]-san! Pretty girls always pair up with absolute maniacs, I swear! That's why you should be careful of them!"

"U-Uh, Zenitsu you should stop.."

He continued to ignore Tanjiro's pleas, only confused when it seemed like there was a shadow forming on him from behind.

"Don't deny the truth, Tanjiro! Do you know how many times I have been punched either by the gut or with words because of their awful partners!?! Shinobu-sama is pretty and all but she's absolutely frightening!"

"Oh, am I now, Zenitsu-kun~?"

A cold sweat dripped down Zenitsu's temple as a familiar chirpy voice rung. He started to tremble before slowly twisting his head and an absolute horrified expression etched on his face upon seeing Shinobu standing and looking down on him with a dark shadow on her face.

"Zenitsu!?"

Shinobu ignored the chaos that ensued when Zenitsu instantly fainted on his spot with Tanjiro immediately going towards him.

Instead, she strode towards Giyuu's direction who grew restless and uncomfortable at the way Kocho stared at him blankly.

Just before he could open his mouth, Shinobu cuts him off. "I'm sorry that I insulted you." Her tone was definitely far from apologetic.

And slowly, a polite smile reached her face as she patted Giyuu's shoulder. "You may continue being friends with my [Name], okay?"

Not bothering on hearing a response, she walked off the room, leaving the ruined peaceful atmosphere.