take the long way home

me, with tears in my eyes: time to make a joke

This is exactly how physics does not work.

Why didn’t she just use the lipstick on the door? 

Dear soulmate, where the fuck are you

I often wonder what happened to authors of unfinished fanfictions.

I hope they’re having a nice life

we absolutely are not and that unfinished fic haunts us to this day

Whenever someone suddenly disappears online, but their accounts are still there, I just assume they’re in jail.

n nn nnn n,,

He’s insulting himself

you know that feeling when you’re out in nature at 5 or 6am and everything’s still quiet and the air still smells like night time and it’s fresh so you shiver a bit but then slowly the first rays of sun peak over the edge of the earth and everything is bathed in foggy, golden light and you just stand there watching the earth awaken.. if that’s not soothing idk what is