Build a Better Baby - Through Boredom!
Let's face it -- your diapered kiddo is going to do whatever you say. Whether it's because they're your sweet, submissive angel (😇) or your freshly spanked brat (😭), your Little will be watching the baby cartoons you tell them to watch. They will play with whatever tinker toys you set in front of them. They will waddle off to bed at the early hour you choose.
But that's not regression. That's compliance.
If you want your pamper packer bouncing up and down at the idea of playing with their shape sorter and bead maze, you need to prime their brains with boredom.
Put them in a fresh diaper, plug in their paci, and lay them down for Tummy Time. Take their phone away. No screens, no books, no music, no conversation, no distractions. Your little one is just going to suckle and stare at the floor. They shouldn't be uncomfortable, but they shouldn't be cozy enough to nap, either.
Do you know how long 30 minutes feels when you have nothing to keep your mind occupied? They are going to be bored out of their mind.
Then, after a couple of weeks of this strange torture, you hand them a toy. Maybe a dolly or a stack of blocks. A spinny wheel that makes animal noises. A box of crayons and some paper.
You won't even have to tell them to play with it. Their starved, shriveling little brains won't be able to resist making their stuffies dance, or soaking in the primary colors of their 9-piece puzzle.
The fun part will come the next time they earn a punishment. Nothing devious or creative. Just say:
And they'll realize what all those blocks and shapes and dolls and crayons have come to mean for them. They might even start crying. They're back to staring at the floor, counting out an eternity of seconds, when all they want in the universe is their spinny wheel that reminds them that the cow says "Moo."
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