𝖑𝖆𝖚𝖗𝖊𝖓𝖙 𝖉𝖊 𝖗𝖊𝖛𝖎𝖓,

no, laurent thinks, i don’t.   but this isn’t his fight.   it had never been his fight.   from the moment he’d sensed animosity, sensed the beginnings of war over this human girl, laurent had decided that he would no longer put his life on the line for james’ little games.   it did not benefit him any longer, and to stay and declare himself on james’ side would be foolish.   and laurent is many things, but he is not foolish.

“this is not my fight,” he says.   he’s chosen his side.   “i understand you and yours have suspicions, but believe me, i am here to help.”

laurent remembers, suddenly, what it was like being human in the midst of such incredible power and strength.   how invincible he felt being around boris so long ago, but also how terrified.   quite often he’d felt a mix of both, but laurent could only imagine how it felt to be this human girl now, with james so ferociously hunting her.   in all laurent’s years, he had never seen a better tracker, and he can’t help but wonder just how this will end.   the cullens have the numbers, perhaps skills that he knows nothing of, but james and victoria… he’s never known them to lose a fight.

“i haven’t a clue what this girl means to you…”   he could see what the human was to edward—and again he likens it to himself and boris to perhaps make it easier to understand—but what did she matter to the rest of them?   why would they feel the need to protect her so fiercely?   “but i know very well what she means to james.   he will scour the earth for her.   he will not stop until he’s killed her and victoria will stay at his side no matter how costly it will be for her.   —   when they are together, they are lethal.”

laurent takes a cautious step forward then, further into the cullen home, and hopes they can see he means no harm.   he’s just so, so very curious... so many questions needing answers, so many puzzle pieces without ways to fit.   and again, seeing all these vampires so willing to fight no matter the odds—how will this end?

in my breaking dawn verse, laurent is with the denalis when they offer to be witnesses for the cullens in the volturi confrontation, so he’s there with them when caius kills her…. and give me laurent having to be forcefully held back like irina’s sisters were because this is the one moment where his heart rules him– and to avenge irina’s death would either start a war or a massacre. the shock of it after, the feeling that he’d lost everything because where does he belong in the denali coven without irina? struggling not to go on a killing spree because why does it matter now without irina?

who is he, now, without irina?

back in alaska, carmen’s constant trips out to laurent and irina’s favorite spot, where laurent has sat propped up against a tree for days on end, mourning by himself because he doesn’t feel as if he has the right to mourn alongside kate and tanya. he and carmen have long conversations during this time– about irina at first, but then about family, the past, etc. laurent, weeks later, finally coming around enough to come inside and all he has the strength to do is place his hand on tanya’s shoulder and vow his loyalty. he promises each of them that he will prove himself worthy of the love irina showed him.

there are a few times where the anger gets the best of him and his control slips a little too fast to save the victims of his own bloodlust. eleazar steps up to train with him– and “training” consists of whatever keeps their minds from irina’s death. laurent’s “slip ups” become few and far between. he and kate bond over a steady anger that never quite simmers no matter what they do or what they tell themselves. it’s talking with kate that shifts laurent’s views of the volturi being systematic rule enforcers. he begins to view aro as a tyrant.